Because of social trends. No one wants to be seen as backwards or outdated, and female empowerment is the current trend. Wanting a powerful female, like one who makes a lot of money, or has a lot of friends, or is willing to go out of her way for the pleasure she wants, is viewed as a "progressive" thing, even when it is destructive in nature.
Meanwhile a woman wanting a strong man, and a man that shows his strength through those same means, is viewed as an outdated, regressive desire, even when it is a positive thing.
Both are simply fetishes, and have the same root, and have similar arrays of positive and negative qualities, but are observed through different lenses thanks to the prevailing views in society at large.