>>11662846>I failed every single fucking timeDude it didn't sound like you failed. To me it sounds like you put in more effort to help yourself than most people i know have (including my shit ass self). I know it sounds like fluffing but you really should be proud of the fact you put in so much effort.
>nuthousesThats mostly a temporary fix for when you feel most out of it as I am sure your probably already aware of.
>psychiatrists being shitthey can be a mess just like therapists you sound like you have gone through most of your options. I understand your reservations. Have you tried finding a therapist at least or some sort of therapy? Its honestly disgusting to me that they didn't refer you at least to someone who may be able to better help you then straight up telling you to get the fuck out (which is what my first therapist did btw)
>nuthouse turned you away even with noteHow the fuck is that possible? I've known people who got locked up for benignly mentioning hurting themselves or others.
>can't explain how I feel in my native languagewhats that? does your native tongue just not have a similar context of words?
>hobbyvideogames are good for a little bit but will eventually start to drive you stir crazy if your anything like me. Are you able to get up and go for a gentle walk. That usually helps me at least clear my head a bit because being inside with distractions lets the thoughts in your mind stew even if you think they aren't. Any sort of physical movement helps calm the screaming in my head in my experience.
>Stranger Thingsdo it. that show is fucking amazing. I also recommend west world if you haven't seen it yet
