>>4512972Okay, just got finished listening to your read-through. Super stoked that you enjoyed it that much.
Also, you sounded a little hoarse. Feeling okay?
>that progression from "aww" to "wait, he's setting something up, isn't he?"I was cackling like a madman through the first half of your blind read; I knew you were too sharp to not see what I was doing, and hearing that process of understanding play out was just so satisfying.
>comments on the conciseness and how the ending reflects the openingYeah, originally I wasn't going to repeat the opening beyond the bit of him waking up, but when I realized how short it ended up being, it occurred to me that the reader would still have the opening prose fresh in their mind and I could pull off a moment of symmetry by exploiting that.
>discussing symbolism in the makeshift umbrellas/pots & pans, and Nick's stubborn doorI'm gonna be honest with you, those are "happy accidents". It didn't occur to me when writing this that the reader could take away that sort of impression from them; they were in fact, as Freud would say, "just cigars".
Also, his trouble with his door is based on me, as in every household/apartment I've lived in, there's always one wooden door that takes a great deal of force to open whenever it gets humid or damp in the weather.
>struggling to find suggestions of improvementI was actually on the edge of my seat for that; wondering if I should get the champagne poppers.
However...
>bringing back Judy's carrots countingYyyeeeeaaaahhhh... It occurred to me when I wrote it.
Came back to mind when I was proofreading and editing it.
But still I marked it finished without doing it, and I still don't know why, because you are correct, it's a call-back that seems like it should happen.
I'll probably do an edit later today and add it in, because it's driving me nuts how I could ignore my instincts in that case.
As always, it's a pleasure to hear you read my stuff.
