>>222473361he's only 25 and a diabetic from all the alcohol, he went to rehab which was huge but after a week he was out and drinking again.
he keeps reaching out to me, he doesn't want to be alone but I just can't cope with all the stress, with all the grief, that I'm watching my friend kill himself- when he's drunk he doesn't even remember that we already had the same conversation twice already.
he goes into these paranoid anxiety induced hallucinations too, they're really hard to deal with, he'll be non-responsive and just start running away.
I have to be there with him- but it's all so hard and it feels so hopeless. like there's nothing anyone can do but watch and be there while he kills himself or suffers from withdrawal. he wanted me over but I just went home today after work and slept.
he could be dead tomorrow. that any of us live at all is nothing short of a miracle when we don't know when we'll go unless we so choose to pick the time.
