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Submission is Mandatory #75

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Sun 13 Dec 2015 23:14:41 No.25757388 View View Reply Original Report

Quoted By: >>25757424 >>25851339 >>25868568 >>25949146 >>25950311

Previous Thread: >>25600347 (archive link: https://desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25600347)

We're /STILL/ canon edition!

>What is this thread about?
This thread is dedicated to stories that have clear dominate and submissive roles; both with and without consent.

>What exactly is welcome in this thread?
A wide variety of stories are welcomed here; from non-consent and sexual slavery, to abusive manipulation and psychological domination, to maids and extortion, and even healthy consensual relationships with BDSM role-play elements. Most stories involve Anon, as well as sexual acts, although neither is required. Both maledom and femdom are welcome.

A few topics that are discouraged are gore, vore, scat, and other similar themes.

>Featured Story
A Royal Breaking
Enzeir
http://pastebin.com/E3K19yXe
The routine is broken one day as the rebels try to bring back light to the world. Under the orders of Nightmare Moon, Anon quickly finds the pony responsible - Princess Cadance, now it's time to make her into Anon's newest pet.

——————

New Pastebin list of all stories: http://pastebin.com/f8f09HB4
—
Old Pastebin list of all stories: http://pastebin.com/778zgnJ5

>SiM wiki page:
http://mulpwiki.org/index.php/SiM
Don't think you have what it takes to write a long greentext? Go here and fill in the pages!
>The current priority is updating the Archive Links.

——————
Historical Note:

This thread was originally founded to support the “Submission is Mandatory” story by MrNameless. While the story has gone on hiatus, it’s content is referred to by a number of stories in this thread.

Submission is Mandatory by MrNameless (Recommended)
Nightmare Moon summons Anon to defeat the EoH. In return, she grants him ownership of the Mane 6.
http://pastebin.com/ycY3zrvA

(Non-Canon SiM Expanded Universe Stories)
Octavia POV (Recommended) http://pastebin.com/Y2AahdQp
Other Stories - http://pastebin.com/3AFdqxvs

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 13 Dec 2015 23:17:51 No.25757424 Report

Quoted By:

>>25757388
>dat castle
>dat episode
>dat 'verse
All of my unf.

Fascist dubs for SiM'verse? Seems appropriate.

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Sun 13 Dec 2015 23:17:57 No.25757425 Report

Quoted By: >>25757446

>>25745262
>What happened next…
>You’ll never forget it.
>The lead stallion quickly approached you as Berry struggled to stand.
>His hoof was only inches from your body when you looked into his eyes.
>He wasn’t upset, or angry, or annoyed.
>He looked determined.
>…
>Then, he was dead.
>…
>From the corner of your eye you saw something long and silver plunge into the side of his head.
>As as quickly, a pink and red mist exited the other side.
>His eyes didn’t change.
>He just fell forward, and collapsed before you, entirely limp.
>You looked toward the wall on your left, and saw what appeared to be a long, slender metal rod, embedded into the brick.
>A small amount of blood and chunks of… other things… were splattered onto the wall.
>You looked up, and saw the two other stallions.
>They were looking at you; confusion and horror clear in their eyes.
>Then, they too were /gone…/
>Two more metal rods flew through them, and into the brick beside them.
>Closed your eyes and screamed.
>…
>A hoof gently fell on your shoulder.
>”Inside Ms. Octavia, we need to leave, /now./
>You opened your eyes and saw…
>Night Watch?

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Sun 13 Dec 2015 23:20:03 No.25757446 Report

Quoted By: >>25757459

>>25757425
>As you looked into his eyes, you instantly knew something was off.
>He looked… different.
>Determined.
>Dangerous.
>Somehow, your mind returned to Burr Berry, who was still on the ground.
>You Watched as he coughed, and a small amount of blood flew from his mouth.
“We need to-“
>”Get inside; I’ll take care of him.
>Looking back to Night Watch, you realized that it was not the time to question him.
>As you galloped towards the door, you saw three small holes torn into the thin metal screen; undoubtably from where he threw the rods.
>Entering the boutique once again, you took a moment to catch your breathe.
>Your mind was racing — frantically trying to take stock of the situation.
>You- you should be safe now.
>But what /was/ that?
>Celestia Royal Guard?
>Trying to foalnap you?
>And Night Watch…
>Your thoughts are interrupted by the sound of Night Watch and Burr Berry crashing through the door.
>Berry is leaning on Night Watch, who is doing his best to support the stricken stallion.
>Trying your best to help, you quickly walk behind them and lock the door, before trotting next to Night Watch.
”What /was/ that? Who were-“
>”Rebels, they must have figured out who we are…”
“But why would they attack us? We didn’t-“
>You’re interrupted by A heavy cough from Burr Berry.
>Night Watch, aware of the problem, looks over at him, and speaks.
>”Hold him for a second Octavia…”

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Sun 13 Dec 2015 23:21:18 No.25757459 Report

Quoted By: >>25757476

>>25757446
>You nod, and quickly walk around his other side, before crouching underneath him, and supporting Berry’s right foreleg on your whither.
>”I’m fine, you don’t need to hold-“
>”You’ve broken three ribs Berry, you aren’t /fine./“
>The boldness in Night Watch’s voice catches you off guard, but you push it aside.
”Is he going to be ok? We need to get him to a hospital…”
>Night Watch shakes his head.
>”We have reason to believe that the rebellions have connections in the hospitals, we can’t send him there…”
>Berry grunts, trying to stand on his own legs.
>”I’m fin-"
>His injuries betray him as he coughs, and places his weight on you once again.
“Well then where can we take him? We can’t just let him die here!”
>Night Watch pulls out a small piece of paper from his saddle bag.
>”He’s not going to die Octavia, those injuries aren’t life threatening…”
“Not life threatening? He’s coughing up /blood!/ He could have a punctured lung!”
>”He doesn’t have a punctured lung Ms. Octavia; he bit his tongue…”
”Wha…”
>You look up, and see blood pouring from Berry’s mouth.
“Berry…”
>He nods.
>”I told you Octavia… I’m fine, my side just … mmm... hurts….”
>As you open your mouth to reply, you hear another set off hoof steps from the hallway.
>Looking up, you make eye contact with Ms. Cherry, who is clearly frantic.
>”Berry!”
>She rushes over, and places her hoof under Berry’s chin.
>”Oh Berry! What happened?”
>Night Watch replies before you have the opportunity to respond.
>”A couple of ponies tried to break in and mug Octavia and Berry…”
>”MUG?!!? Oh Celestia! Are you OK Berry?”
>Berry grunts.
>”I’m /fine/ mom…”

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Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Sun 13 Dec 2015 23:22:47 No.25757476 Report

Quoted By: >>25757488 >>25764879 >>25765652

>>25757459
>You can tell he’s clearly still in pain, but trying his best to hide it.
>It dawns on you that he might not want to appear weak in front of you or his mother.
>Stallions and their egos…
>You slowly wiggle out from underneath his leg, and allow him to support himself.
>”Berry fought them off — they ran away before I could even see what happened…”
>”Oh Berry…”
>Berry makes eye contact with Night Watch briefly, before looking at his mother once again.
>Clearly he noticed the change of story as well.
>”Mom I’m fine… really…”
>Seeing that he’s able to at least stand by himself, you quickly walk around him, and to Night Watch.
>Turning away from the Burrs, you speak in a low whisper.
“What do we do Night Watch?”
>You see him quickly sorting through a number of papers, with Celestia’s Royal seal on them.
“What are those?”
>He quickly scans over them, befogging folding them in half, and placing them in his saddlebag.
>”Documents they were carrying with them.”
>”They were part of the DawnBringers…”
>You raise an eyebrow.
”DawnBringers?”
>Night Watch nods.
>”The Guard that escaped the initial return fled into Canterlot’s Lower, Market, and Noble districts, and have been forming a resistance force.”
>But…
“The Guard? I thought you said you didn’t know what happened to them?”
>He meets your gaze.
>Deep… intense…
>His eyes tell you everything.
>He was lying…

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Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Sun 13 Dec 2015 23:23:53 No.25757488 Report

Quoted By: >>25757554 >>25757828 >>25759083 >>25760787 >>25761218

>>25757476
Done. This post obviously changes a few things. feedback, comments, suggestions, etc are welcome.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 13 Dec 2015 23:30:06 No.25757554 Report

Quoted By: >>25757828

>>25757488
I like it. We haven't had some good worldbuilding in a while, and this does that.

Octavia doesn't do much, but there's not a lot for her to do in this scene. NW was interesting; it seems like there's more to him than he first presented of himself. Berry is dense, but seems to be a stand up dude.

I'm interested to see what happens next.

>to the thread
So who here thinks that NMM sent Octavia out to draw out the DG?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 13 Dec 2015 23:51:39 No.25757828 Report

Quoted By: >>25757884

>>25757488
Not what I expected, but entirely fine with me. NW being secretly a badass makes sense since he's charged with guarding Anon's pets.

Though I wonder if it's all him or if he has some of those scrolls helping him. Being able to easily one-shot-kill thee ponies in a row AND being able to use medicinal magic to immediately tell exactly how many ribs Berry broke, definitely moves him away from "actually he was a secret agent with professional training all along" category and moves him dangerously close to "my OC can beat Superman, everyone look how awesome he is" category.

>suggestions
Do what NW says, take the dress Berry made (If she hasn't done that already), and return to the castle ASAP.

>>25757554
>So who here thinks that NMM sent Octavia out to draw out the DG?
If she knew how much of a badass NW was, it sounds pretty reasonable.

Berry's pretty cool too.

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Sun 13 Dec 2015 23:56:06 No.25757884 Report

Quoted By: >>25757994 >>25758032

>>25757828
> Being able to easily one-shot-kill thee ponies in a row AND being able to use medicinal magic to immediately tell exactly how many ribs Berry broke
A /brief/ reply here. I didn't intend for it to be OP NW is OP. I tried to imagine NW did some basic medical eval outside when picking up Berry from the ground. Maybe knowing the exact number of ribs broken was a stretch, but it wouldn't be hard to quickly identify he broke a few.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 00:07:43 No.25757994 Report

Quoted By:

>>25757884
>one-shot-kill three ponies
Honestly, if he's half way competent that wouldn't be hard given the situation. He wasn't in a straight up fight with them, he more or less had the advantage of an ambush. Not hard to rack up a lot of kills that way.

>medcicinal magic
Eh, again not a huge stretch. If he just poof and healed him, that'd be bullshit, but assessing an injury? That has to be a pretty standard guard spell. For regular soldiers, learning to assess injuries is the first part of learning basic battlefield medicine.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 00:11:42 No.25758032 Report

Quoted By:

>>25757884
You do have a penchant for making 'slightly bad-ass' characters as over powered as possible. Maybe in the future (for any fight, not just NW), you'd want to show a bit more of a struggle, maybe have NW come away injured as well? Otherwise, pretty good update, I'm glad NW isn't going to end up Nightmare's latest victim.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 00:19:41 No.25758120 Report

Quoted By:

so when do we get the BB update?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 01:32:10 No.25759083 Report

Quoted By:

>>25757488
Well that was unexpected, but I liked it.

Obviously raises a lot of questions with NW.

>OP NW
This is kinda the interesting one. NW lying about the rebels is obvious, but was his abilities in dealing with them consistent with his story, or was that part of a lie too. It's not unreasonable to assume he has some training, and he did have the element of surprise.. but then it did seem a bit OP.. so I feel like it could go either way.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1449960284396.png, 650KiB, 1280x956

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 02:58:56 No.25760113 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 04:00:50 No.25760787 Report

Quoted By:

>>25757488
Regarding 'OP NW' - I'm honestly assuming those ponies weren't actually Royal Guard, because they behaved like a pile of retards and not professional soldiers. I'm betting they're just some ponies who got recruited into the Dawnbringers and decided that made them Royal Guard.

I am also assuming, of course, that Night Watch isn't as inexperienced as he suggested. Looking back, there are a couple of other hints he might not have been telling the truth either (would an ex-museum-guard really have thought about that business with the restaurant without a thought?). He may have played Octavia entirely.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 04:38:48 No.25761218 Report

Quoted By: >>25761331 >>25761362

>>25757488
>suggestions
This is more of a general comment and not really tied to the latest update.

It's been awhile since we've really had sub/dom elements in this story. Obviously this arc is light on them because they are away from the castle, and I'm enjoying the world/character building as much as anyone, but I'm starting to miss it.

Good of a character story as this is, I still come here for fetish-y stuff. I worry that the story is going to lose interest without a bit of it mixed in, especially as the story no longer has MrN's heavily fetish-y story running beside it.

To be honest, I'm curious how other readers feel about this, so I guess this is more of a discussion point than a suggestion.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 04:50:06 No.25761331 Report

Quoted By:

>>25761218
I think Olibird's cyoa has a chance to bring in some of that. There is also talk of merging with the slave auction general

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 04:52:40 No.25761362 Report

Quoted By:

>>25761218
It's definitely a thing I've noticed that our longest-running stories tend to turn into more drama than fetish material. Octavia POV, Bluebird, even MrN was slowly turning more dramatic than a constant chain of >rape

Speaking of Bluebird...

!sKAfVnup4Y

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!sKAfVnup4Y Mon 14 Dec 2015 04:54:30 No.25761380 Report

Quoted By: >>25761392

Continuing from http://pastebin.com/G97Nn1XW

"Define 'missing'?"
> "Uh-uh-uh, Anonymous. You wanted the hook, you got it - nothing more."
> Gritting your teeth at the Queen's tone, you squeeze the bridge of your nose.
> Returning Chissik now - while she was still accompanying Trixie - would force you to find another handler for the showpony if you needed to use her again.
> But that could be done, with some time.
> What Chrysalis offered seemed far more critical.
> A princess, missing?
> Why hadn't your ponies reported this - surely they should have gotten word through to you faster than it took to reach the Crystal Empire and then the Changelings?
"Fine. As soon as I can, I will make contact with Chissik and return her to your control. But, in accordance with our earlier agreement, if I need a task carried out you agree to still have her handle it?"
> "Of course, Anonymous."
> Her tone suggests there'd never been any question, prompting you to suppress a snort at the thought of the Changeling ruler being honest.
"Then you have my word - provided this is as good as you say. Talk."
> And talk she does, ignoring your demanding tone to get straight to the point:
> "Twilight Sparkle abruptly vanished from Ponyville two weeks ago and has not been seen there since."
> You're forced to admit - when you'd reached out to Rarity to negotiate the fillies' return, you had been told Twilight wasn't there first.
> At the time you'd thought nothing of it, but now...
"How do you know what's going on in Ponyville?"
> "Oh, Anonymous."
> An amused little titter issues through the speaker.
> "I might not be trying to conquer Equestria at the moment, but that doesn't mean I've told all my subjects to abandon their duty."
"Terms of your treaty with Cadance are that you keep your changelings out of Equestrian affairs, Chrysalis."
> "And I will respect the boundaries of the pink whore's domain. The rest of Equestria has no agreement with me, though."

!sKAfVnup4Y

!sKAfVnup4Y Mon 14 Dec 2015 04:55:44 No.25761392 Report

Quoted By: >>25761408

>>25761380

"Celestia and Luna won't see it that way. Or any of the rest of the government. You're inviting a conflict."
> The Queen's tone turns harder
> "You worry about yourself, Anonymous. I will keep my subjects safe."
> You're about to point out that your safety was as much dependent on her treaty holding, but squelch the words in your throat.
> No time for that argument now, not when something else was on the line.
> You'd deal with the loose cannon that the changeling queen was later.
"Go on, then. I assume there's more than her just not being home?"
> "Two days ago, one of my infiltrators positioned on the docks of Vanhoofer tasted a princess' magic being used - aboard a ship. The crew would not let him get close to investigate further."
"Tell me he didn't do anything rash."
> "Of course not. He told the dock guards that the ship was suspicious, but when they searched it, no princess was there."
"And your agent was certain?"
> "Absolutely. Less than three hours later, the Vanhoover guard suddenly turned out in force to hunt Sparkle. Apparently two ponies came running to the guard saying that she had secretly hired them to help her with something, then suddenly left them as well."
"Let me guess: The guard didn't get aboard that ship?"
> "Before they could reach it the ship suddenly cast off and departed. They chased it briefly, but suddenly came back without reaching it."
> Your brows knit tightly as confirms your suspicion.
> Well-trained guard pegasi, not checking a ship that had only just left port?
"You had the ship under watch the entire time, I presume."
> "Naturally. Just as it was departing, my agent tasted a princess' magic in use again. She was there."
"Those guards were told to stop. Someone didn't want them knowing she was aboard."
> "Of course. I'd love to have asked her hired help what she was doing, but they've suddenly decided to take a vacation to Canterlot - and even I do not risk going there again."

!sKAfVnup4Y

!sKAfVnup4Y Mon 14 Dec 2015 04:57:14 No.25761408 Report

Quoted By: >>25761424

>>25761392

> You can't help but feel a slight shudder at the was Chrysalis places such emphasis on 'love'.
> She wasn't supposed to be holding captives now, but you increasingly suspected that those two ponies would not have been returned from any interrogations.
> But - more importantly now - what would Twilight Sparkle be doing aboard a simple cargo vessel under such secrecy?
> And why hire help?
> Princesses could surely requisition the services of the most loyal of Equestria's guard?
"Well. I do think you've got something there. I'm wondering, though, what is she doing..."
> "That is not my concern. I am still under treaty, after all."
> You grit your teeth slightly at Chrysalis' continued disregard for your situation.
"...fine. Get a proper report put together, with all the information laid out. I'll check my sources. If they match your story, Chissik will be yours again."
> "Oh, excellent!"
> Her tone turns abruptly chipper as the changeling queen claps her forehooves together; you never could quite get those sudden emotional switches she went through.
> Yet, this time she for once sounds genuinely pleased to have her... servant? Subject?
> Whatever Chissik was to her, Chrysalis was glad to have her back.
> "I'm so very, very glad we've come to an agreement."
"As am I. I'll contact you again when there's word of what has happened."
> During the conversation, Dash has twisted herself around to fix you with a worried look.
> When you end the call, she speaks up at last:
> "Master? What's happening?"
"Twilight Sparkle's developed a sudden affinity for seafaring."
> Dash only looks confused at this, prompting a shake of your head.
"She's apparently decided to take a sea voyage without telling anyone, but with the backing of someone important enough to tell the Vanhoofer guard to ignore her presence."
> "Oh."
> Dash pauses, glancing out the window again.
> "Does this mean we're going to have to go soon?"

!sKAfVnup4Y

!sKAfVnup4Y Mon 14 Dec 2015 04:59:09 No.25761424 Report

Quoted By: >>25761478

>>25761408

"We should. It wouldn't have been much time anyhow - another orbit, and we'd have had to leave anyhow before night came to Equestria."
> With one last longing look out the window, Dash nods mournfully.
"Hey."
> You reach over to ruffle her mane lightly.
"Don't worry. There might be a chance to come up here again, and in the meantime I promise reentry will be worth it."
> Without a word, Dash follows close behind you as you start making you way through the weightless corridors.
"Say - I don't suppose you would know where Twilight might be going?"
> "No, Master."
> Despite her inexperience in null-G, Dash seems to have adapted well - keeping up with you while talking freely.
> "We've never really gone sailing. Never far, anyhow - there's rail lines far enough out to almost reach griffon territory, and we've never needed to go further."
"So, whatever she's going for, it's probably something she's never been to before."
> Rubbing your chin, you grimace - it was a fair guess that Twilight was looking for something to defeat you with, but what?
> Equestria was awash in artifacts of varying power already; which might she be seeking overseas?
> "Are you going to try and hunt her down, master?"
> There's a note of worry in Dash's voice.
> Another reminder that however much she might sympathize with you now, she was not yet ready to abandon her one-time friends entirely.
"Sort of. If I can, I will try and find out what she is doing and where... but I've no interest to actually attack her."
> With that you go silent again, left with your own thoughts.
> Even long after the shuttle has undocked itself and the 'Obstinance' carried itself away to an orbit invisible to Canterlot, your mind keeps swirving back to the same thoughts.
> While Dash was enraptured by the viewscreens' images of plasma flowing from the hull as you deorbited, they were barely noticeable to you.
> At a certain point you realize that you are almost certainly obsessing over this.

!sKAfVnup4Y

!sKAfVnup4Y Mon 14 Dec 2015 05:04:43 No.25761478 Report

Quoted By: >>25761518

>>25761424

> Descent had long since turned to flight; the shuttle had reached Equestria's coastline - gleaming waves below turning to trees made to gold by the evening's last light.
> Why were you so fixated on this?
> Equestria's rulers had been working against you for months now, after all.
> The answer comes a moment later, worming its way up from the depths of your mind no matter how stinging it is to admit it:
> You were fixated, because you were scared.
> On some level, being assaulted by three foals had shaken your confidence.
> Their invasion into your home had only been made possible by a fluke - a corrected one - but psychologically?
> Psychologically your home - your fortress - was no longer safe.
> A frown touches your lips as a result of that thought as the shuttle circles about for its final landing - the only outward sign of the discomfort you dare show.

--------

> You rub your chin, reading over the twin reports occupying your screen.
> One was the full version Chrysalis' spy had reported, while another was from a pony who lived in the city.
> Neither should have been aware of the other, but their reports corroborated enough.
> Clearly Twilight Sparkle had been in the city, doing something aboard a ship - and then abruptly departed when it seemed like she had been discovered.
> Departed, or been taken?
> It wasn't an impossibility that she might have been captured somehow, though it was deeply unlikely.
> No - if she had been actually kidnapped, the remaining elements would not have been so calmly living their lives in Ponyville still.
> They knew where she was.
> Then something was very definitely up.
> Briefly you wonder if Twilight would make an appearance at the next meeting you were scheduled to have between Dash and her friends.
> If not - well, that might be problematic in its own right.
> She was supposed to be the one who verified your continued 'treaty' with the elements; if not her...
> Hrm.
> One of the other elements, perhaps?

!sKAfVnup4Y

!sKAfVnup4Y Mon 14 Dec 2015 05:07:45 No.25761518 Report

Quoted By: >>25761542

>>25761478

> But they held no legal authority to deal with you.
> Maybe Cadance?
> The crystal princess had proven agreeable in the past; surely she'd see the benefit in continuing the peace between yourself and Equestria?
> Grumbling, you stand and return up the flight of stairs.
> Following the sound of your prisoner's voice leads you to the next set of problems on your mind.
> While you'd printed a fair number of Equestrian books - both educational and entertaining - the fact was you simply were not prepared to house and keep three fillies for any significant period of time.
> Already you could tell they were straining at the boundaries you had set down for them, and as time went on and you ran out ways to keep them occupied there was no way to be certain what would try.
> Of course the drones were keeping them contained, but accidental injury in an escape attempt was as much a reasonable worry as anything else.
> At the same time, however, releasing them early simply wasn't something you were prepared to do.
> Not until Rarity finished her work in Canterlot.
> At least that much you could safely verify, and give you that much more reason to believe she would uphold her part in refusing to wield her part of the elements against you.
> But until then...
> Pausing in a doorway, you lean against the doorpost and watch your slave and the three fillies as they sat close together on the floor.
> Dash had returned from your trip in a much better state of mind.
> And while you could still see the effects the rejection of her sort-of protege had on her - the little winces, the occasional bouts of morose sulking - you could also see her beginning to recover.
> Suppressing a soft chuckle, you watch Dash show the compass-watch you'd given her to the 'crusaders'.
> "...and when I push this thing on the back, it switches right back to the being a clock again. See?"

!sKAfVnup4Y

!sKAfVnup4Y Mon 14 Dec 2015 05:09:55 No.25761542 Report

Quoted By: >>25761584

>>25761518

> A small chorus of amazed noises meets her demonstration - the fillies evidently either ignoring or no longer distraught by the fact said watch was linked to the metal collar about Dash's throat.
> Only Scootaloo was still ignoring Dash outright, and you could see her shooting quick surreptitious glances at the watch when Dash isn't looking in her direction.
"Can't help showing off a bit, hmmm?"
> Dash nearly leaps straight into the air before bowing and shooting an apologetic smile in your direction.
> "Sorry, master. This thing is really cool."
"I'm not upset."
> Pushing off the wall, you approach the four.
> All of the fillies display varying degrees of hostility, from light fear to a glare that suggests the young pegasus would still throttle you if she could.
> Squatting down, you give what you hope is your best reassuring smile and put o the least-threatening tone of voice you can.
"Actually, I wanted to talk to you three, if I could?"
> No answer is forthcoming, but neither do any of the three visibly refuse.
"How about-"
> The unicorn had always been the most fearful of the three, and fear was easiest to manipulate.
"-Sweetie Belle, yes? Come with me for a minute."
> Waving off the other two before they can object, the little unicorn rises to her hooves and nods.
> "I'll - I'll be right back, girls."
> Two rooms is sufficient distance to be out of earshot, and the dining room seems to be a none-too-threatening space.
> Settling into a seat, you motion for Sweetie to take another.
> Casting a worried glance about, she leaps up into the chair and curls her tail protectively about her legs.
> "So - um - what - how can I, um, help?"
> Casting a hopefully-reassuring smile, you lean back and try to make yourself as non-threatening as possible.
"Just let me ask - before you came to try all of this, did any of you happen to notice if Twilight Sparkle had gone somewhere?"
> "Princess Twilight? Um, no. Not that we knew of."

!sKAfVnup4Y

!sKAfVnup4Y Mon 14 Dec 2015 05:13:07 No.25761584 Report

Quoted By: >>25761599

>>25761542

>>25761542

> Her hoof scuffs awkwardly at the chair's seat.
> "We actually had to be real careful sneaking out just because of that."
"Oh?"
> "Yeah. Well, her castle is kind of the tallest thing in Ponyville. And she has a lot of telescopes to see all kinds of things - stars and planets and the moon and stuff, but ponies too. If she'd seen us..."
> After a second Sweetie Belle builds up enough courage to look you in the eye:
> "Is she coming now, Mr. Anonymous?"
"Unfortunately, no."
> You shake your, frowning.
"In fact, I cannot say exactly where she is at all. I was hoping someone would know, since being able to reach her is very important to keeping everyone here safe."
> That gets their attention, leading you to chuckle softly.
"I don't foresee any problems yet - I'm sure your sister is still doing her best to set up your return, Sweetie Belle - but it is a... concern."
> Far more than you were letting on.
> "Um... Mr Anonymous, that we don't know where she is - is that bad?"
"Not for you - I just need to know if you have any idea of how I can reach her."
> "No. I can't remember anything; she was up in her castle the night we left. She hadn't said anything at my last magic lesson with her either."
"You take magic lessons with her?"
> You're unable to keep the surprise from your voice, or your eyebrows from rising.
> "Uh-huh. Miss Cheerilee's a nice teacher, but she's an earth pony and my parents didn't want to send me away from Ponyville, so Twilight agreed to tutor me."
> Hrm.
> Could their disappearance have provoked Twilight to some action, if she was that close to one of them?
> But she'd already been gone when you reached out to Rarity, with knowledge of the fillies' location.
> And that still didn't answer what the point of that ship was.
"You're certain she didn't say anything?"
> "Nuh-uh. Twilight can get... kind of focused when it comes to teaching. Like, sometimes she'll go on even though we're supposed to be done."

!sKAfVnup4Y

!sKAfVnup4Y Mon 14 Dec 2015 05:15:37 No.25761599 Report

Quoted By: >>25761611

>>25761584

"Did anyone else happen to know you were leaving?"
> For the first time the filly actually works up the guts to give you a look - one that says 'what, are you stupid'?
> Chuckling gently, you nod.
"Point taken. Okay. Thank you, Sweetie Belle. You can go back now."
> Picking through the other two fillies' responses is rather trickier.
> Applebloom's surety that you were some kind of comedic villain and Scootaloo's incessant vitriol masked most of the useful information.
> But in the end you were forced to confront the fact that none of them could give more than childish guesses about what Twilight might be doing either.
> "Master?"
> Dash's voice interrupts your thoughts, dragging you back to the situation at hand.
> You'd returned with Scootaloo, and now all four of them again sat in a close huddle - pairs of eyes peering up at you with a wide mix of emotions.
> "Are you alright?"
"Yes - just, thinking over what options I have."
> Pausing a moment, Sweetie sheepishly adds in a small voice:
> "Sorry..."
> "You don't have to apologize to him for anything, Sweetie!"
"You shouldn't be so hard on her, Scootaloo."
> Turning to the exit, you shoot what you hope is a reassuring smile.
"She's doing the best she can to protect you. Really."
> Giving Dash a brief nod, you slip from the room.
> As soon as you are out of sight, the smile fades from your lips.
> Two calls you would have to place now.
> One of them, to Chrysalis.
> She'd held her end of the deal up; you'd no reason to refuse your own.
> And then - Cadance.
> If Twilight truly had vanished, then your best bet at keeping yourself safe was the crystal princess.
> Slumping back into your seat back in the basement 'office', you feel a lance of pain run through your forhead.
> A vigorous rubbing helps alleviate it, but not remove entirely.
> With a sigh, you return to your business.

!sKAfVnup4Y

!sKAfVnup4Y Mon 14 Dec 2015 05:17:02 No.25761611 Report

Quoted By: >>25761622

>>25761599

> This time Chrysalis chooses to open a full video feed for your call, lounging atop what you suspect is a chaise lounge she wouldn't normally make use of.
> "Well, well. I hope you've found my information satisfying."
"Agreeably so, yes. None of my contacts would have known to make anything of this if they hadn't been tipped off. It'd have just been another 'princess sighting'."
> Hopefully a little buttering-up would do well to soothe the temperamental monarch's ego.
> "Good. Then, your end of the agreement?"
> She really wasn't going to wait at all, was she?
> Fine, then.
"I am, as always, a man of my word, Chrysalis. I will reach out to my contact in Manehattan, pass on the word to release Chissik from my service."
> And to start keeping an eye on Trixie in her stead.
> "Most excellent, Anonymous. We are very, very grateful for this opportunity."
"It has been a pleasure to do business with you again, Your Highness."
> Particularly the part where she didn't try and stab you in the back this time.
> A part of you briefly wonders whether Chissik would be punished for failing her original task.
> If so, it at least would not be on your head.
"Until next time, then."
> The second call you need to place goes to Cadance and Shining Armor.
> Neither of them is apparently around to answer, however, and so you leave a message instead.
> Short, simple, and to the point.
> Twilight is missing, and it is in both your interests to forge another agreement.
> Call back when possible, ta-ta.
> Leaning back in your seat, you can't help but feel a slight twinge of concern.
> What if they didn't respond?
> Could the other Elements continue your agreement on their own?
> Rising from the desk with a sigh, you decide to turn in for the night.
> No point in keeping yourself up over it.
> Ensuring the three filly guests are safely shut up in the rooms you'd set aside from them, you start to make the climb to your room.

!sKAfVnup4Y

!sKAfVnup4Y Mon 14 Dec 2015 05:18:21 No.25761622 Report

Quoted By: >>25761634

>>25761611

> Yet, even as you slip into bed, you find your own mind whirling - unable to so easily let of things.
> Sleep, it seems, is not yet ready to come for you.
> So distracted are you, in fact, that you do not quite hear the sound of hooves on the floor until the bed shifts.
> Rolling to face the opposite side, you find Dash eyeing you with a tilted head.
"Something the matter, Dash?"
> Pawing at the bed with one hoof, her eyes fall.
> "I was kinda gonna ask you the same thing, master?"
> The corners of your mouth turn up in a small smile.
> This kind of actual attention from Dash was a new development, but not an unwelcome one.
> You beckon Dash to come closer, and she sinks into a spot beside you, atop the covers.
"Is it that obvious?"
> "Well, yeah. I've been here long enough to know when you're thinking real hard, and this is even more."
"Hmm."
> Laying a hand on her back, you let your fingers stroke through her coat a few times.
"It's a strange thing to feel, Dash, but for the first time in a long, long while I am afraid."
> "Afraid?"
> She doesn't sound ready to believe her, and you cannot blame Dash for that.
> You'd done everything you could to present yourself as an impregnable bulwark to her.
"Yes, afraid. It is something new to hear me admit that, isn't it? But true - things are no longer moving in my control. It's not a pleasant feeling."
> "Like, being lost here again? After your thing blew up?"
"I suppose. When I first realized I was stranded here, fear never really entered into it; shock and depression yes, but not fear - it was too sudden. Fear... is something new."
> Rolling to rest on her belly, Dash lays one leg atop the other and her chin over both.
> Your hand again settles across her back, feeling the ridges of bone and muscle running beneath her coat.
"If being stranded struck me like a sledgehammer, then this is a gnawing, burrowing thing that worms its way into me."

!sKAfVnup4Y

!sKAfVnup4Y Mon 14 Dec 2015 05:19:26 No.25761634 Report

Quoted By: >>25761647

>>25761622

> "It's okay, Anonymous. It's... not wrong with being afraid, or showing it."
"...you say that, Dash, but have you ever faced true fear? To see your life as you knew it slipping from your control?"
> "Yes."
"Before you came to me, I mean."
> "Yes."
> Still not a drop of hesitation is in her voice.
> "I have. I've been - terrified. I've done crazy things just to stay 'in control', especially of how ponies thought about me."
> Like trying to end her life at the muzzle of your pistol, just to have made the choice on her own to do so.
> Was she trying to draw a parallel to your situation - how you carefully regulated and manipulated your relationships with others?
> Those were business, though...
"You've never been in control, though. Even before me, the princesses would put so many limits on your life, and-"
> "That's not the point, okay? I - I know how you feel about them, but that's not the point."
> Dash flinches as you give her a sharp, spearing glare.
> Helpful or not, she was not supposed to interrupt you.
> It is not one that can persevere, however, and as soon as it drops Dash resumes in a softer tone.
> "So what if I wasn't really in control. I still - I still tried to be, all the time. I fought everyone so I could tell myself I was in control. But... it wasn't needed."
> Breath rushes from your lungs as you feel a touch of a smile again appearing.
"Naive. I see what you're trying to do, Dash - you think if I can somehow stop being afraid, I'll somehow patch over my conflicts with Celestia."
> "Seriously. You're afraid of losing your ship, right?"
"That ship is my life. And, frankly, I have no illusions about what Celestia and Luna will do to me if I am captured either."
> "They - they wouldn't. I could speak to them, tell them -"
"Dash."
> Your smiles grows warmer, though you can feel it never quite reaches your eyes.
"It's appreciated, Dash. But I doubt anything you could say will stop them now."

!sKAfVnup4Y

!sKAfVnup4Y Mon 14 Dec 2015 05:20:40 No.25761647 Report

Quoted By: >>25761661

>>25761634

> Her head hangs somewhat, and your vision returns to the ceiling.
"Things are moving quickly now. Twilight has not gone on some journey for no reason whatsoever, and Chrysalis risks her treaty - our treaty. I feel she's planning something too, and my plans just are not moving fast enough."
> "Hey."
> In a reversal, a hoof comes to gently rest on your shoulder.
> "I'm still the most awesomest pegasus ever, and I don't wanna see this end with anyone more getting hurt either. I'll do my best."
> It's bluster, and the both of you know it.
> Without her flight, Dash wasn't much of a pegasus - let alone an 'awesome' one.
> But still...
"Appreciated, Dash. It is appreciated."
> Unexpectedly, she extends a wing across your chest.
> The fan of blue is still ragged and uneven from where she'd taken out the newly-grown flight feathers.
> Almost unconsciously you find your hands moving to stroke along the tattered span - stroking and adjusting, shifting the few fully-grown feathers she had left back into their proper places.
> A glance aside reveals a flush on Dash's cheeks as your fingers deftly do their work, but unlike so many previous times she does not hide her face from you.
> Instead she almost seems to be... accepting your actions, her head having fallen to rest on the bed and eyes regarding you softly.
> No more words are exchanged between you, and at some point you drift off into sleep with your hands still resting across Dash's outspread wing.
> With the next day's morning comes a pleasant surprise.
> Cadance had responded.
> Unfortunately you had missed her in turn, but when you try and send a message back you're instead met by a live signal.
"Ah, Your Highnesses! I hadn't expected to be able to speak to you directly!"
> "Neither had we expected to hear from you so soon again, Anonymous."
> You aren't quite sure whether that was a shrouded insult from the pink-coated alicorn.

!sKAfVnup4Y

!sKAfVnup4Y Mon 14 Dec 2015 05:22:28 No.25761661 Report

Quoted By: >>25761774 >>25761813

>>25761647

> From her husband you'd have been certain, but he'd fortunately opted to keep his mouth shut and simply skulk in the background of the image.
"Unfortunately, times have become turbulent for the both of us. I think cooperation might again be in our mutual interest."
> "So you have said."
"Twilight Sparkle is missing. I am sure the implications for my situation are not lost on you."
> Unfortunately neither Cadance nor Shining Armor give any indication of surprise at the information.
> Nor that you were aware of it.
> That alone is telling; though they must have expected you would find out eventually, they still felt the need to hide their true reactions.
"Without anyone to secure my ongoing peace with Equestria, I'm concerned that things might become... destabilized."
> A twitch in Cadance's face - though you can't tell exactly for what.
"If you'll remember, your last visit was aimed at being the first step in bringing relations between us to a less fearful state. This current situation puts me at a terrible risk, but it could be another opportunity."
> "I agree. But what do you do on your part? Just another visit?"
"On the contrary. I think it's time Dash was allowed to take a trip out to the real world."
> Two pairs of eyes widen at your words - and then go narrow wish suspicion.
> "What are your conditions?"
"There is a - a party, I suppose you'd call it, in Fillydelphia coming up. I've been invited, on account of recent actions I took to aid the city."
> "You want to take her for that?"
"Not just for the shoulder-rubbing, of course. The chance to be out in a city again - maybe even a meeting with her friends, face-to-face..."
> Now you've absolutely got their attention.
"You recognize, of course, the immense risk I take in doing this. I trust Dash understands the situation she is in - why she will have to stay with me. But, I'm also going to be trusting Equestria's government."

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 05:33:41 No.25761774 Report

Quoted By:

>>25761661
I'll assume that's all for now?

I'm /very/ excited to see this side of the story again. Personally speaking, while the outer-space scene was interesting, I think the diplomatic games between Anon and the Princesses / M6 are the meat and potatoes of this story. I'm really looking forward to how things develop from here, especially with this Twilight situation being so fluid.

!sKAfVnup4Y

!sKAfVnup4Y Mon 14 Dec 2015 05:36:35 No.25761813 Report

Quoted By: >>25761908

>>25761661

> "And all of this for us agreeing to provide cover for your imprisonment of her."
"Not really. I want to be able to go to this party as well - that is my gain. But, bringing Dash and allowing her to speak with her friends is a bonus for you. A step towards when negotiations won't be needed to let her do that."
> Cadance draws a deep breath, and nods.
> "You probably know that I don't think you should be allowed to leave that house until you see punishment for your crimes - but I see how your idea would be good."
> Rather than answer, Cadance glances aside to Shining Armor, who has remained pointedly silent.
> Some moment of unspoken communication passes between them, and then she turns back to you.
> "We are on our way to Canterlot. We'll bring up the idea with Princesses Celestia and Luna, and if there are no problems then this would seem to be a good next step."
"Oh? Well - I should say, the element of generosity - Rarity - is already in Canterlot. She's pursuing the same goal; you might want to have a word with her."
> Your voice has been kept steady and calm.
> Internally, though, you are seething.
> The two would have inevitably come into contact even if you'd not mentioned it, but either way it still complicated things.
> Cadance was unlikely to be pleased that you'd used the fillies for leverage, even if it'd been entirely justified.
> ...but at least letting her know ahead of time would make it seem like you were being 'honest' with her.
"Well - in that case, then, I will be waiting anxiously to hear back from you."

New Pastebin: http://pastebin.com/nCXLvr7s

Note that this is an entirely new pastebin, on account of Bluebird's first paste actually exceeding the filesize limits.

!sKAfVnup4Y

!sKAfVnup4Y Mon 14 Dec 2015 05:46:30 No.25761908 Report

Quoted By: >>25762054 >>25762077 >>25763572 >>25768088

>>25761813

>New pastebin
I phrased that badly. It's a -second- pastebin, as I couldn't fit this section in the old one without hitting the size limits. That old pastebin - the one I linked at the beginning of this section - will now no longer be updated.

>General thoughts, etc
I apologize again for the incredible delay on this section. More than anything, I think it's on account of Bluebird nearing its conclusion - this next Fillydelphia 'arc' is likely to be the second-to-last one - and I find myself writing and rewriting things to ensure they all fit when the conclusion comes together. Very often I feel just not capable of doing justice to all the plotlines I am trying to tie together here, or making sure nobody's acting too out-of-character.

It is around 50% longer than my normal updates, though - so hopefully that is at least something of an apology.

In terms of feedback, every bit helps, but I'm particularly interested in how people think I managed to get the negotiation bits down as I wasn't totally confident in my writing there.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 06:02:59 No.25762054 Report

Quoted By:

>>25761908
Oh god. So good. Your story is one of if not my favorite.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 06:05:10 No.25762077 Report

Quoted By:

>>25761908
Chrysalis is frustrating. It feels like something is off but that could actually be the feeling of Anon coming through, everything is less and less in his control is its frustrating. His position is more and more degrading as time goes on.

His ship is dying and the components he uses are too rare to make another base.

I'm worried he'll have to become more nomadic soon. His current situation is looking less and less secure.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 07:06:32 No.25762703 Report

Quoted By:

Bampper

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 09:32:46 No.25763572 Report

Quoted By:

>>25761908
I'm not a literary expert but your story is one of my favorite I've read. This update did not disappoint and I love the Dash affection. Just don't die like MrNameless or SepAnon (who's story is similar to yours).

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 15:08:58 No.25764625 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 16:12:38 No.25764879 Report

Quoted By:

>>25757476
It's funny. I always imagined Night Watch as a follower of Nightmare Moon. Part of a secret order that was waiting for her return to serve. Hence the position he earned when she came to power and the fact that NMM tends to always know what is going on.

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Mon 14 Dec 2015 18:25:52 No.25765652 Report

Quoted By: >>25765657

>>25757476
>You look back to Berry, who is saying something to his mother.
”The DawnBringers?”
>”Their tactics have been difficult to identify, although this is the first time we’ve seen them physically attack on a civilian…”
>Keen on his reference, you look back at Burr Berry.
“So… this is new?”
>He nods.
>”We don’t have time for this conversation now, we need to get you back to the castle before something worse happens…”
>Suddenly, you hear Ms. Cherry gasp.
>”Berry!”
>Turning around, you see Berry on the ground, coughing up a /lot/ more blood.
>Cherry is frantic.
>”I- I don’t know what happened! I just gave him a hug, and-“
>You rush over to Berry, and kneel on the ground beside him.
”Berry- what wrong?”
>He shakes his head, and gasp loudly.
>Instantly, you recognize what happened.
>That hug- she must have pushed one of his ribs into…
>Turning back to Night Watch, you frantically yell.
”Night Watch, we need to do something!”
>Ms. Cherry’s panicked voice fills the air, only adding to the stress of the situation.
>”I’ve already sent for backup, they should be here soon…”
>Night Watch quickly walks over to Berry, and steadies him with his magic.
>”We need to get him to the front, the guard will transport him to a safe-house and take care of him there.
>Ms. Berry, interrupts.
>”A safe house? What do you mean a /safe house?/ we need to get him to a hospital!”

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Mon 14 Dec 2015 18:26:53 No.25765657 Report

Quoted By: >>25765663

>>25765652
>You mentally curse to yourself.
>Burr Cherry doesn’t know what’s going on.
“Ms. Cherry, it’s ok, we can’t take him to the hospital so-“
>”What do you mean we /can’t/? We need to take him now!”
>Slowly, Berry’s body begins to levitate off the ground, picked up by Night Watch’s magic.
>”Get ahold of her Octavia, I’m moving him to the front room…”
>You nod, and quickly stand, placing a hoof on Cherry’s shoulder.
”Ms. Cherry, I don’t have to time explain, but Night Watch is a Royal Guard, and we need to be careful-“
>”Night Watch? Who is? Night Watch?”
>You rub your eyes, realizing your mistake.
”Estate - Estate’s real name is Night Watch, he’s my guard from the castle-
>”The Castle? What about the Castle?? We need to get Berry to the hospital, now!
>You sigh, realizing it would be impossible to explain everything quickly enough.
”I don’t have time to explain Ms. Cherry, please, just listen to what he has to say…”
>She shake her head, and tries to walk past you.
>”That’s my Berry, Octavia! He needs to get to a hospital!!”
>You hear the door bell jingle, signaling someone has entered the store.
>Turning, you motion for Ms. Cherry to follow.
“Come on Ms. Cherry, we don’t have time…”

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Mon 14 Dec 2015 18:27:55 No.25765663 Report

Quoted By: >>25765674

>>25765657
>As you enter the front room your stunned to see almost a dozen guards standing around Night Watch and Berry.
>”Take that bag there, and dispose of it once we’re gone... there are three more out back…”
>You look toward where his hoof is pointing and see a large pile of fabric on the ground, with a small, dark red stain.
>…
>It’s a pony…
>Ms. Cherry can’t see this.
>You quickly turn around, and block Ms. Cherry’s path, preventing her from entering the storefront.
”Stay here for a minute Ms. Cherry, they’re busy out front.”
>Yet again, she objects, and tries to push past you.
>However, she quickly sees the swarm of guards, and stops.
>”Why are all of those ponies in here…”
“I /told/ you Ms. Cherry, Night W- Estate is a guard, he’ll take care of Berry… please, don’t get in the way…”
>Looking over your shoulder once again, you see Night Watch finish speaking with the stallion across from him, before turning around and looking at you.
>Seeing your situation with Ms. Cherry, he quickly makes his way over.
>In the background, you see the other guards lifting Burr Cherry, who is frighteningly motionless, off the ground, and out of the front door.
>”Where are you taking my son! I need to go with him!”

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Mon 14 Dec 2015 18:29:03 No.25765674 Report

Quoted By: >>25765681 >>25765715

>>25765663
>Again you’re forced to hold Burr Cherry back.
>It’s… uncomfortable having to separate a her from her son like this…
>Finally, Night Watch speaks.
>”Ms. Cherry, my name is Night Watch, I’m with Empress Nightmare Moon’s Lunar Guard.”
>That catches her attention.
>”Lunar Guard? But aren’t you Octavia’s-“
>”We’re moving your son to one of our facilities in Canterlot to be watched over— given the situation. it would be best for you to stay here…”
>She shakes her head.
>”I /told/ you, I’m going with my foal!”
>Night Watch, with a surprising amount of composure, replies.
>”I understand Ms. Cherry, but the attackers didn’t get a look at you before, so they don’t know you’re connected…”
>”If we move you outside right now, they might still be watching, and see who you are…”
>”You’re /in danger/ Ms. Cherry, I’m trying to keep you safe.”
>Fortunately, that seems to ring a bell with her.
>”In danger?”
>Night Watch nods.
>”I’ll have a detail of guards stay with you here until it’s safe to transport you; you should be with your son in no more than a few hours…”
>He points toward the back room, where the dress and suit are being stored.
>”Octavia, move her into that room for now while I finish dealing with things up front.
>It takes you a moment to stop /watching/ Night Watch, but after a moment, you nod.
”I… yeah - ok.”

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Mon 14 Dec 2015 18:30:05 No.25765681 Report

Quoted By:

>>25765674
>Quickly, you escort Ms. Cherry to the back room.
>It takes a moment to get her settled, and grab the clothing the Berry made for you.
>By Celestia’s grace Burr Cherry was too concerned and flustered to ask questions, or notice as you hastily covered the Beast’s strange garment.
>After trying your best to calm the mare, a pair stallions arrived at the door, and inform you to report to the front.
>After kissing Ms. Cherry on the cheek, and trying your best to assure her Berry would be ok, you raced to the front room, with the clothing you ordered laid across your back in storage bags.
>”Captain, we’ve secured the parameters, but haven’t found any other DawnBringers so far…”
>Your ears twitch.
>Night Watch is a Captain?
>Replying the the stallion, Night Watch nods.
>”Keep looking, I don’t think they would have tried this without support.”
“I’m ready…”
>Your voice causes him to turn and look at you.
>”Yes… we should get going; is your business done here?”
>You grasp the hanger in your teeth, and pull the garment bag off your withers.
”Yeah…”
>He grabs the bag, forcing you to release your grip, before handing it to one of the ponies beside him.
>”Have them run these through inspection; I’m not having anything un-checked go into the Castle…”
>The pony quickly nods, before placing the bag into a small box, and locking it shut.
>”Yes Captain, I’ll see to it…”

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Mon 14 Dec 2015 18:34:54 No.25765715 Report

Quoted By: >>25765723

>>25765674
>Quickly, you escort Ms. Cherry to the back room.
>It takes a moment to get her settled, and grab the clothing the Berry made for you.
>By Celestia’s grace Burr Cherry was too concerned and flustered to ask questions, or notice as you hastily covered the Beast’s strange garment.
>After trying your best to calm the mare, a pair stallions arrived at the door, and inform you to report to the front.
>After kissing Ms. Cherry on the cheek, and trying your best to assure her Berry would be ok, you raced to the front room, with the clothing you ordered laid across your back in storage bags.
>”Sire, we’ve secured the parameters, but haven’t found any other DawnBringers so far…”
>Your ears twitch.
>Sire?
>Replying the the stallion, Night Watch nods.
>”Keep looking, I don’t think they would have tried this without support.”
“I’m ready…”
>Your voice causes him to turn and look at you.
>”Yes… we should get going; is your business done here?”
>You grasp the hanger in your teeth, and pull the garment bag off your withers.
”Yeah…”
>He grabs the bag, forcing you to release your grip, before handing it to one of the ponies beside him.
>”Have them run these through inspection; I’m not having anything un-checked go into the Castle…”
>The pony quickly nods, before placing the bag into a small box, and locking it shut.
>”Yes Sire, I’ll see to it…”

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Mon 14 Dec 2015 18:35:56 No.25765723 Report

Quoted By: >>25765747

>>25765715
>”Very well, prepare the escort detail outside; we’ll be out in a minute.”
>The ponies all nod, before quickly filing out of the door, leaving you and Night Watch alone in the storefront.
>H takes a few steps toward you, before placing his hoof of your shoulder.
>Perhaps out of uncertainty, you look down.
>”Are you ok Octavia?”
>You curtly nod.
”Yeah… I’m fine…”
>He pauses for a moment.
>”This isn’t your fault; things have been hectic since the Empress returned…”
”Yeah- I know, I just…”
>You look toward the body lying under the fabric.
>Four ponies /died/ here — possibly five…
>All because of you…
>You hiccup as you try to speak, and feel your eyes begin to water.
”I just didn’t expect…”
>Perhaps predicting the breakdown, Night Watch pulls you into an embrace.
>You burst into a small spurt of tears, which are quickly soaked into his coat.
>It’s… embracing; crying in the hooves of a stallion you don’t even know.
>...
>After a few minutes he pulls away, again holding you a leg’s length.
>He reaches for a handkerchief, and wipes the rest of the tears from your cheeks.
>”We need to get going, the quicker we’re back inside the castle, the better.”
>Nodding, you close your eyes for a moment to compose yourself, before replying.
”Ok… let’s go.”
>Night Watch nods in reply before motioning for you to walk outside to the awaiting escort.

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Mon 14 Dec 2015 18:40:15 No.25765747 Report

Quoted By: >>25766139 >>25768407

>>25765723
Done. Feedback, comments, and suggestions are welcome.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 19:40:36 No.25766139 Report

Quoted By:

>>25765747
GREEN FOR THE GREEN GOD, WORLD BUILDING FOR THE WORLD BUILDING THORNE

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 22:38:16 No.25767590 Report

Quoted By:

Up from 10.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 23:28:06 No.25768088 Report

Quoted By: >>25768116

>>25761908
>general delay
Dude, given the quality of this update and length I'd say you've got nothing to apologize for, this was really damn good.

>losing control
I found this really interesting, because you basically worked exactly how I've been feeling the last few updates into this one.

When this all started, it was Anon in his impenetrable fortress/mansion, with Twilight and friends occasionally making attempts that he didn't seem to concerned about. You managed to put him in a strong position without it feeling excessively OP (probably because while he was almost untouchable, what he wanted was entirely out of reach).

All good things must come to an end though. As fun as the story has been, Untouchable Anon fully breaking RD and living happily together forever wouldn't do the world you've built justice. There has to be change for the story to progress to an ending, and I think you've done a really good job (both in this update and the last one) of showing that happening in a realistic way.

I'm going on a hunch that an amicable resolution isn't likely, at some point someone has to lose.. what I find interesting is that you're essentially showing both sides as making progress. Anon is starting to gain a little sway, but evidently Twilight and friends haven't been sitting still either, and somehow even though you only now directly addressed that, I've somehow gotten that impression. We know they know things arn't right, and unlike Dash we know they probably are doing everything they can.

>story ending
Hugely mixed feelings on this. That you've got an ending planned I think is hugely good, as a lot of stories just kinda go on and on direction-less until the author/readers get tired of it. As much as I'll miss this story, I'm looking forward to seeing how it all wraps up.

That said, there's basically no realistic ending (that I can figure) that's not gonna be bitter as fuck (_maybe_ bitter sweet if we're lucky).

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 14 Dec 2015 23:30:58 No.25768116 Report

Quoted By:

>>25768088
(cont)

>Anon going out in public with Dash
This is a weird one.

First off, it seems dangerous as fuck, and I'm left wondering if this is something Anon actually wants to do, or something he feels he has to do in order to progress his goals. If I were Anon I'd stay holed up in my fortress, but I'm thinking Anon has realized he needs to build influence to have a chance of repairing his ship, and to do that he's got to take this step.

It also feeds on this actual peril vs safe and secure Anon having fun thing we started with. I felt kind of the same way when he did his little fake dragon thing, and this is like that except turned up to 11.

>CMC
I was surprised they were still there, I somehow figured it was just assumed that they'd been safely returned already. Anon nervously questioning them was really good character building. Gotta say you really did rattled Anon well.

>Negotiations
They didn't stand out to me as being unrealistic, though to be honest I was so wrapped up in everything I mentioned above I didn't really scrutinize them (especially the later ones with Cadence). I'll take a second read when I get a chance and try to give some feedback.

>Suggestions
Don't have much to offer unfortunately. I feel like you've already got a planned out direction, and things are so open with possibilities now that I can't even guess at where things are going.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 15 Dec 2015 00:01:55 No.25768407 Report

Quoted By: >>25769299

>>25765747
>Night Watch is commanding an entire unit.
>Other ponies address him as sire.
Yeah, going with what I said before. He definitely lied about being recently recruited from being a museum guard.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 15 Dec 2015 01:23:35 No.25769299 Report

Quoted By:

>>25768407
Or maybe he was a museum guard, but that was just a cover and he was part of a secret society.

Olibird

Olibird Tue 15 Dec 2015 02:16:24 No.25769882 Report

Quoted By: >>25769895

>>25690628
>The two of you wander through the wastes, running across a straggly bush here, a copse of trees (if they could be called that) there, and all the while the two of you run through Luna’s story.
>The version Cadance tells more or less matches up with what Luna told you.
>At least, superficially.
>Cadance’s version sounds like it’s straight out of a fairy tale.
>Luna’s jealousy from ponies sleeping through her nights attracted a monster that turned her into Nightmare Moon, leading Celestia to be forced to banish her…
>The whole thing was carefully crafted to absolve both sides of any blame.
>Despite repeated attempts to drill Cadance about it, she’s unable to offer you any insight behind her aunt’s motivations.
>The conclusion you’re forced to draw is, either Luna was telling the truth, and Celestia drove her insane, or Luna was lying to you and attacked Celestia unprovoked.
>Until you can tell how sneaky she’s being with you, you still don’t know where she stands.
>Then again...you’re still half expecting to wake up tomorrow with a knife in your back.
>On the plus side, however, you’ve gathered enough wood that you SHOULD be able to make some kind of door to block one of your captives in.
>Whether or not it’ll be sound proof remains to be seen.
>As far as food goes, you two find plenty of things that Cadance claims she and her aunts can eat…
>As for you?
>Aside from a few small, wild vegetables, it looks like you’re going to remain hungry tonight.
>Eventually, the two of you move on to more pleasant topics for your guest to talk about.
>She happily regales stories about her husband and the realm she rules over, where her castle is made out of solid crystal, and how she won it from a dark sorcerer with the help of her friends.
>Unlike most stories from newcomers, these tales aren’t tarnished by the knowledge that the storytellers will never see those things again.

Olibird

Olibird Tue 15 Dec 2015 02:17:25 No.25769895 Report

Quoted By: >>25769909

>>25769882
>It’s easily one of the best times you’ve had while foraging for supplies.
>Having company, even if it’s barely willing, is something you don’t want to give up again.
>After what you’d guess to be a couple hours, Cadance freezes, her ears standing at attention. “Do you hear that?”
>...
>She’s like a dog or something.
“No, I’m not hearing anything. What is it?”
>It sounds like…a foal? This way!”
>With a flutter of her wings, Cadance pulls the leash taut for the first time, causing you to stumble forward as she threatens to tear it from your hands.
>At least this time, you’re ready for it.
>You pull right back on it-not enough to stop the human sized alicorn, but enough to make her necklace slide up and dig into her neck.
>Approaching her, you ‘reel in’ the vine, not letting her pull away.
“Are you TRYING to get us both eaten?! Or do you really think your aunts would banish a foal to this place?”
>Her ears slink down, the hurt from your insinuation visible in her eyes, ”Of course they wouldn’t. But I know what I’m hearing! Couldn’t...couldn’t somepony be born in this place?”
>Ho boy.
>That’s never been a topic you’re comfortable thinking about.
>Especially when you think about what you’ve done to the ‘natives’ you’ve dealt with.
“I-well, yes, they can. But...”
>You trail off as it hits you.
>Yes, you know better than to fall for this...but this is exactly why you’ve taken her out here.
“Fine. Tell you what. We’ll check it out. But you NEED to stay quiet.”
>She raises an eyebrow. “Does that mean…?”
>She glances at the muzzle, the question hanging in the air.
“Nooo, not yet. I just meant that if you can hear it, it means others can, too. Lead the way, Cadance.”
>Lead you she does, down into what could generously be called a small canyon.
>Discord once told you that, from above, Tartarus looks as tortured as its inhabitants.

Olibird

Olibird Tue 15 Dec 2015 02:18:28 No.25769909 Report

Quoted By: >>25769926

>>25769895
>Jagged mountains are torn out from the surface, canyons and gorges split the ground, and the whole place is pockmarked with glowing lakes of lava that reflect off the hazy atmosphere, giving the realm what little light it has.
>Of course, you could have told him that, just from your years spent wandering.
>As Cadance leads you, her pace slowly increases until the two of you are running along, eventually you start to hear the echos of of child crying wordlessly.
>It isn’t too long before the only thing that’s keeping her from running off is the vine tied around her necklace.
>The two of you round yet another corner as the cries claw at your eardrums...with a glance, you see it’s right there!
“Stop!”
>You hiss out, digging your heels into the rocky ground and pulling hard on the leash.
>But the pink pony shows no sign of obeying-the sight of a foal in distress only exacerbated her own.
>In a contest of strength, the “harmless” alicorn soon proves to be the victor, your feet threatening to slip out from under you as she starts to drag you along.
>Shit, shit, shit!
>She’s going to run right into it!
>Just as you lose your footing, you swing your spear like a club in desperation, the shaft wacking her foreleg before you fall face first in the dirt.
>”Gahoww!”
>Cadance stumbles, giving you all the time that you need.
>Scrambling onto your hands and knees, you pounce on your escort, wrapping your arms around her as you tackle her onto her side.
>”Master let me go, she’s-”
>You slap Cadance across the face in a desperate move to shut her up.
>It works.
>She lays there, her jaw agape as she looks at you, stunned.
>Probably more from the fact that you just hit her, than from any actual pain.
“What the HELL are you doing?! Are you TRYING to get eaten?!”
>You whisper-yell as best you can, glancing up at the crying pegasus baby, your eyes wide.
>...Oh thank whatever, it hasn’t moved.

Olibird

Olibird Tue 15 Dec 2015 02:19:32 No.25769926 Report

Quoted By: >>25769942

>>25769909
>”You just hit me...” Cadance holds a covered hoof to her cheek, her mouth hanging open.
“Shh!”
>Taking another glance to reassure that outburst hasn’t compromised what little safety you have, you climb off her, yanking hard on her leash.
“Back. Here.”
>She slowly climbs to her hooves, shock plastered on her face as she numbly shambles back around the corner.
>Only once you’re reasonably confident that imminent doom isn’t about to befall the two of you, do you speak up, tearing into your guest.
“What did I say before we went out?! When I tell you to do something, you NEED to do it!”
>”You hit me...” Cadance mumbles again, her shock giving way to betrayal.
>Oh for fucks sake.
“You’re damn right I did! You were about to do something incredibly stupid. I thought you’d find it preferable to being EATEN.”
>That seems to shake Cadance out of her stupor.
>Rarely does anything good come from shaking things.
>”Stupid? Rescuing a foal is stupid?! Did you see her?! She’s crying, her wing’s caught under that rock, and she’s probably starving! We need to help her!”
“No.”
>Cadance jerks back as though you had slapped her again.
>”...Why? She can share my room if THAT’S what you’re worried about! Or is it because you only want to keep ponies you can torment? Is that the reason you had me stay with you? It’s just not my turn yet?”
>She tugs at the leash with a hoof...somehow...to emphasize that last point.
>With a deep sigh, you pinch your eyebrows.
“Cadance, how many ponies do you think your aunts have banished here?”
>”I...I don’t know. A dozen? How often did they banish creatures here? You’re avoiding the question!”
>You aren’t sure which is worse: the baby’s or Cadance’s crying.
>One of those two is starting to make your head throb.
“I’m not avoiding it, I’m answering it. And you were close, by the way. You were only off by about eleven.”
>She raises an eyebrow.

Olibird

Olibird Tue 15 Dec 2015 02:20:35 No.25769942 Report

Quoted By: >>25769958

>>25769926
“In the entire time I’ve been here, I’ve only ever seen one, single pony. He was a unicorn. Last I heard of him, he was some cyclops’s pet.”
>”Wh-what are you saying…?”
“What I’m saying Cadance, is THAT,”
>You jab your spear towards the source of the continued crying,
“Is NOT a pony. It’s not even a changeling. Ponies do not get sent here, Cadance. That’s a siren, it’s something that preys on newcomers.”
“That’s a lesson most people find out the hard way. I’m sparing you that pain.”
>”Master, that can’t be a siren, there’s no water around here, and they don’t masquerade as foals.”
>For a moment, you consider arguing the point.
>...You didn’t actually know that a siren was a THING in horse land.
>It was just a nickname you gave a certain type of creatures.
>But, rather than tempt the nearby monster, you decide that a demonstration will do a better job at convincing her.
>Even if it’ll be irresponsibly dangerous.
“...You know what? Fine. You win. Let’s go rescue the filly.”
>She hesitates for a moment, “Is this a trick?”
>You give her a dirty look.
“Do you actually want to help her, or do you just like arguing with me?”
>She continues peering at you, before a smile creeps onto her face.
>”I’m glad you aren’t a heartless monster after all. Master.”
>You bite your tongue, resisting the urge to comment on that.
>Instead, you wave your arms, wordlessly saying, ‘After you.”
>Cadance follows the silent command, walking back around towards the source of the ever-present crying.
>You follow close behind, keeping a tight hold on that leash.
>Your heart pounds as the ‘trapped filly’ comes into sight.
>This is a bad idea, this is a very bad idea.
>Trying to push those intruding thoughts out of your mind, you scan for a usable rock.
>It’s too late to turn back, now.

Olibird

Olibird Tue 15 Dec 2015 02:22:02 No.25769958 Report

Quoted By: >>25769969

>>25769942
>”Hey there! It’s ok, we aren’t here to hurt you,” Cadance calls out to the filly.
>The crying stops, the grey, dust covered foal opens her large eyes to stare at the two of you in wonder.
>...
>There!
>”Hi there! I’m Cadance. What’s your name, little filly?”
>Snatching up the roughly spherical rock, you clutch it as you prepare to pitch it like a ball.
>You’ve worked on your throw since the Cerberus incident.
>Cadance lowers her head and holds her hoof out in an inviting manner...perfect.
>Putting all your strength into it, you pitch the rock.
>It flies right over Cadance’s lowered form and hits the filly square in the face.
>”What-?!”
>Whatever your guest was about to accuse you of is cut off as the filly screams out, its back arching unnaturally.
>The ground erupts around the boulder ‘pinning’ the filly as gigantic, tapered legs emerge, each joint easily dwarfing you.
>That screaming takes on a beastial quality-no longer one of fear, but a scream of rage.
>The filly and rock lift up as the body of the creature begins to unburrow itself, revealing themselves to be a ‘lure’ on the beast’s back.
>You pull HARD on Cadance’s leash, not giving her any more time to process the scene.
>Tearing her away from the emerging siren, you scream out,
“Run like hell!”
>Letting out her own scream of terror-she must have seen its true face-Cadance thankfully obeys, her hooves digging into the ground as the two of you run for your lives from the emerging monster.
>It isn’t long before you find yourself having to once more tug on her leash, this time to keep her from knocking you off your feet.
>Even with all the supplies you two have found weighing her down, she’s still faster than you on four legs.
>Unfortunately, the monster with eight legs is faster still.
>Its pointed legs crash against the rocky walls of the crevasse as it gains on the two of you, its high pitched shrieking piecing your skull.

Olibird

Olibird Tue 15 Dec 2015 02:23:07 No.25769969 Report

Quoted By: >>25769976

>>25769958
>Stupid, stupid!
>There’s nowhere to hide, nowhere or you two to lose it!
>Of COURSE this would be a trap, how could Cadance not see it before?!
>...Worse yet, how could you let her walk right into it?
>You even sprung the damn thing.
>Frantically, you start reaching down, grabbing any rocks you can and throwing them behind you, not daring to look back.
>The occasional snarls interrupting your pursuer’s screeching is the only sign that you’re hitting it.
>But it doesn’t stop. It doesn’t slow down.
>Out of the corner of your eye, you see its foremost legs crashing down beside you two-it’s right there!
You aren’t going to escape it!
>...But you are not about to let this THING hurt your guest and ruin all your plans.
>Not without a fight.
>Whirling around, you heft your spear high, taking a split second to locate a weak point.
>One of its black, beady eyes, just above those clacking mandibles will do nicely.
>Locking on to your target, you let your spear fly, your weapon proving as accurate as the rock you had thrown earlier.
>The spear sinks right into the creature’s eye.
>Your pursuer rears back and screams in agony, swinging up two pointed legs to claw at its face.
>There’s no time to bask in your victory.
>The two of you continue sprinting away, the sounds of your pursuer fading as you soon leave the gorge behind, not slowing down for a second.
>You aren’t sure how long the two of you run for.

Olibird

Olibird Tue 15 Dec 2015 02:24:09 No.25769976 Report

Quoted By: >>25770995 >>25771543 >>25772536 >>25773366 >>25803869 >>25808811

>>25769969
>Eventually, Cadance stumbles before falling forward onto her belly, her sides heaving.
>”I can’t...I can’t keep going…”
>Hah!
>It’s good to know that you can hunt down the princesses...if need be.
>Well, you could have, if you hadn’t just given up your weapon of choice.
>...Fuck.
>You’re down to just your knife and the one you gave Cadance, aren’t you?
>The two of you are screwed if you run across anything you can’t outrun, now.
>But...you can’t turn back, can you?
>You still haven’t found a meal for yourself...
>Gulping air, you look back to see that there’s no sign of your pursuer...it probably gave up after the two of you made it out in the open.
“It’s alright. Cadance. Catch your breath. We lost it.”
>She doesn’t need to be told twice, her wings splaying out as she makes no attempt to stand.
>”What...WAS that thing? Sirens...are aquatic…”
“That, Cadance? THAT, is why you LISTEN to me, when I tell you something.”

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 15 Dec 2015 03:42:35 No.25770995 Report

Quoted By:

>>25769976
so good.
You do a great job with the descriptions too.
"Tartarus looked as tortured as its inhabitants"

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 15 Dec 2015 04:30:57 No.25771543 Report

Quoted By:

>>25769976
Other guy got here before me, but I'll echo that: There was some really good atmospheric writing in this.

Also, the idea of a lanternfish-like filly lure is pretty cool.

Anyhow, I get the feeling Cadance has taken in the lesson now. Give her the explanation, and the reiterate: That thing is the least of our concerns out here; it's at least nice enough to signal its presence and not come hunting us first. And to eat us quickly, for that matter. Other things... aren't so polite.

Caffeine 40k

Caffeine 40k Tue 15 Dec 2015 06:00:46 No.25772536 Report

Quoted By:

>>25769976
You're back! We missed you!

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 15 Dec 2015 06:35:32 No.25772859 Report

Quoted By:

Bump Before Bed.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 15 Dec 2015 07:34:52 No.25773366 Report

Quoted By: >>25775318

>>25769976
I love this. Both how descriptive you are, and how you manage to make Anon can be a badass and still be completely fucked at the same time. I think it shows just how bad this place is.

>Celestia and Luna being racist
I'm not even surprised.

>Cadance being naive and learning a lesson.
Mission accomplished I guess. Anon bitch-slapping her was satisfying and I hope it happens again soon.

>Anon loses his pear
That's a damn shame, but it's still better than being eaten. Also we should make it clear to Cadance that it's HER fault we lost our her weapon because of her being STUPID.

She disobeyed the rules we established by disobeying us, and we also clearly told her that “under no circumstances do you destroy any of the equipment, or let it be destroyed." Which she just did by insisting on checking up on that filly. Yes, technically it was us that threw it, but is she refuses to take the blame we won't be willing to risk our equipment to save her life again, so... it's her choice. (We should also take back the knife we gave her if she refuses to take responsibility.)

If she feels like she owes us something (her life and our spear) she should be much more cooperative in the future.

>what do
Head straight back home. Yes we didn't get any meat, but we're not going to hunt down anything without a proper weapon. We have a knife, wood and rope, so making another one shouldn't be a problem once we have the time to put those thing together. Meanwhile we can eat the vegetables, or the horses.

Actually, if we could find a way to plant some seeds, we should consider stepping up the civilization ladder by graduating from hunter-gathering to husbandry-farming, and putting our prisoners to work.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 15 Dec 2015 10:58:02 No.25774503 Report

Quoted By:

Page 10.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 15 Dec 2015 14:49:13 No.25775318 Report

Quoted By: >>25777449

>>25773366
>>Anon loses his pear
I don't think that fruit will be that useful to him in the long run.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 15 Dec 2015 18:20:25 No.25776338 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 15 Dec 2015 20:47:05 No.25777449 Report

Quoted By: >>25779165

>>25775318
Aren't pears supposed to be a fertility thing? Maybe he just wants to breed Celestia.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 906272.gif, 1MiB, 620x593

Anonymous Tue 15 Dec 2015 22:15:30 No.25778461 Report

Quoted By: >>25778492 >>25780469

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 15 Dec 2015 22:19:28 No.25778492 Report

Quoted By:

>>25778461
[unzips lizard]

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 15 Dec 2015 23:32:23 No.25779165 Report

Quoted By: >>25779602

>>25777449
I can't fault him for that. Breeding the princesses is 10/10 fetish.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 16 Dec 2015 00:07:20 No.25779602 Report

Quoted By: >>25780564 >>25782276

>>25779165
>Anon breeds the princesses.
>Eventually has a small army of hell-spawn satyrs at his beck and call.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 16 Dec 2015 01:26:12 No.25780460 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 0937994.png, 409KiB, 918x784

Anonymous Wed 16 Dec 2015 01:26:57 No.25780469 Report

Quoted By: >>25791353

>>25778461

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 16 Dec 2015 01:37:26 No.25780564 Report

Quoted By:

>>25779602
>Eventually bursts out of Tartarus with hellsatyr army at his command
>Twilight has won
>Didn't know how to trigger the rainbow power without Discord's assistance, though
>Instead it was a long fight lasting weeks and trashing large portions of Equestria
>Most places are barely hanging on
>And Anon's army is fresh for the fight

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 16 Dec 2015 03:20:43 No.25781600 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 16 Dec 2015 04:19:50 No.25782276 Report

Quoted By:

>>25779602
>pony succubus satyrs
Huh. New fetish. Neat.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 16 Dec 2015 06:25:57 No.25783996 Report

Quoted By: >>25784006

>Fleur cannot contain herself any longer and -with a scream muffled by her muzzle- sends a wave of her own juices streaming down the sides of the device.
>Lord Anonymous had a word for it, one she is well past incapable of remembering.
>She did know that it is something from his homeworld, a design recreated by memory and... tweaked.
>He never said how, but that was the farthest thing from the front of the trembling mare's mind.
>It has been hours since she was locked into her bindings.
>Her holes were filled with perfect replicas of her master's member, slowly sexing her in silent synchronicity.
>A low hum could occasionally be heard over the sounds of the normally quiet mare, a hum belonging to the vibrating pad teasing her teats and waiting in perfectly aligned ambush for her rapidly winking clit.
>She was exhausted.
>Her body had long-since surrendered to the agonizing bliss imposed upon it.
>For a time she had counted every orgasm.
>Usually Master was incredibly sparing in allowing them.
>But this... this was too much.
>She no longer dwelled upon the crashing waves of endorphins coursing through her system.
>Perhaps she wouldn't be able to sit for a day or two, but that wasn't on her mind.
>She did not think, as she arched her back in anticipation, about the soupy mess dribbling from her glistening marehood.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 16 Dec 2015 06:27:00 No.25784006 Report

Quoted By: >>25784021 >>25784040

>>25783996

>She did not think, as she arched her back in anticipation, about the soupy mess dribbling from her glistening marehood.
>It barely registered when, as her legs lifted her as far as they could, her teats gained a momentary reprieve.
>All that she knew, as another howling cry rang out through the room, was that her Master was very happy with her.
>After all, only good ponies are allowed to cum.

>After what seemed to be days, the machine slowed down, gently coasting to a complete shutdown.
>Minutes passed, and Fleur slowly regained her senses.
>She could feel every twitch- she was still very much over-stimulated.
>...and now acutely aware of that fact.
>She heard the door open, and hoofsteps.
>No... footsteps...and hoofsteps?
>Master must have Lyra with him.
>He was showing her the castle when he left.
>She squinted as the blindfold was removed, allowing her to confirm her last thought.
>Her Master removed the muzzle, while Lyra released her bindings.
>Scooping her up in his arms, Anonymous carried the exhausted mare to the bed, and laid her down.
>Too tired to be curious, Fleur lay there, content to listen to the sounds of Lyra cleaning up while a gentle hand caressed her back.
>She knew she was sweaty, undeserving of her Master's ministrations, but that was not her decision to make.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 16 Dec 2015 06:28:01 No.25784021 Report

Quoted By: >>25784035

>>25784006

>Besides, she appreciated his decision.
>His hand paused, and moments later she felt the magic damper removed from her horn.
>He always forgets it.
>Not that it's really necessary anymore. She was better than that.

>Only when Anonymous rises does Fleur lift her head.
>She stares after him, and watches him approach Lyra.
>The mare just about has the machine spotless.
>In her magic, she floats a jar of a slightly golden liquid to him.
>He grasps it, examining the contents curiously.
>Opening the jar, Anonymous sniffs the contents, before dipping a finger into it.
>Whatever it is, it's strong, based on his reaction.
>He replaces the lid, and sets it on his workbench, then grabs an empty one from a box.
>Crouching down, he places it in a door Fleur hadn't noticed on the device.
>He says something, and Lyra's eyes dilate to an unbelievable size.
>Fleur can't help but giggle at the poor girl's reaction.
>Someday Lyra will share her foresight, but it's cute how she doesn't yet know how to read their Master.
>On go all the restraints, the muzzle, the damper.
>She'll need it, until she learns to control herself.
>With eyes full of lust and fear, Lyra looks up at Anonymous, who only smiles back.
>Stepping behind her, Fleur can hear the barest whimper across the room as her Master reaches under Lyra's tail.
Fleur lays back and waits, ears perked up.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 16 Dec 2015 06:29:02 No.25784035 Report

Quoted By: >>25784120 >>25785080

>>25784021

>A moan tells her that the first rod is in place.
>A yelp assures her the second one is in as well.
>A low hum, a moan, and footsteps.
>Her Master should be back any-
>Ah! He's back!
>The bed sags beside her, and she's gently pulled up beside him.
>For such a large, strong creature, Lord Anonymous is always careful and gentle.
>She muses that most ponies he encounters don't know this side of Him.
>Fools, all of them.
>They could have such a better life if they knew to accept the natural order.
>"The Beast" they call him, ignorant to all the great things he's done.
>"Fleur?" he asks "Are you alright? Your heart's started beating faster."
>"I was... thinking." she admits cautiously.
>"Oh?" he presses "What are you thinking about that has you all worked up?"
>"About the common ponies" she elaborates "How stupid most them are... "
>"And this is news to you how?"
>"It's not that...it's just, that, it is absolutely infuriating the way they speak of you!"
>"Ah. Don't let it bother you- I dont'." he assures her. "Just more rewards for good ponies like you."
>Any response Fleur might have made is cut off by the muted cries of Lyra as she crests her first peak.
>A hand finds its way into Fleur's mane, accompanied by a low, masculine chuckle.
>"Sleep, Fleur. You deserve some rest. Lyra's going to be a while."

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 16 Dec 2015 06:29:17 No.25784040 Report

Quoted By: >>25784120

>>25784006
Oh, shit. Is that you, Hawkeye?

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Wed 16 Dec 2015 06:34:36 No.25784120 Report

Quoted By: >>25785080 >>25786487 >>25920313

>>25784035

Just a short bit for now. I have 9 pages written to be dumped in the not-too-distant future.

I've been away from the thread for quite a while, how is everyone.

Did Nameless ever return?

>>25784040
I'm surprised anyone remembers me. Hell, I left almost a year ago.

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Wed 16 Dec 2015 08:32:55 No.25785080 Report

Quoted By: >>25786117 >>25786628

>>25784120
Wow. It has been... forever since you've posted. I'm excited to see an older writer like you popping his head back into the thread.

As for >>25784035, upon first read-through. I'm not sure who the POV is from. Perhaps that could be clarified? Also, I'm not entirely sure if this is a continuation of an older story, or something new. But with that said, I'm /very/ much looking forward to whatever content you have prepared for us.

>MrNameless
No, he has not. Unfortunately, I've lost the e-mail which I used to contact him, so my "backdoor" method of reaching him is actually gone. Perhaps he still lurks the thread? I doubt it, but there's hope.

>MrN, if you're here, drop a reply?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 16 Dec 2015 12:23:06 No.25786117 Report

Quoted By:

>>25785080
>tfw for all we know, he still lurks here periodically, he's just afraid of the shitstorm that'll ensue if he ever posts.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 16 Dec 2015 14:36:02 No.25786487 Report

Quoted By: >>25786628

>>25784120
I don't forget a writefag that fast, and Mouth of Anonymous was a story that really stuck in my head. Good to see you back and writing!

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Wed 16 Dec 2015 15:14:14 No.25786628 Report

Quoted By: >>25793764

>>25785080

Guess I'm a bit rusty. I'll take a look at it and see if I can clarify POV.

This will be a continuation of the Fleur story, and as far as I have written so far it remains in her POV. It is possible that Lyra's POV may begin appearing in the future, but for now the focus is solely Fleur.

>>25786487
It's good to be back, though I had forgotten what it's like to have expectations on my shoulders.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 16 Dec 2015 17:57:17 No.25787532 Report

Quoted By:

Up from 10.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 16 Dec 2015 20:14:16 No.25788567 Report

Quoted By: >>25790554

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 16 Dec 2015 21:29:53 No.25789333 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 16 Dec 2015 23:24:11 No.25790554 Report

Quoted By:

>>25788567
submit

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 16 Dec 2015 23:26:39 No.25790576 Report

Quoted By:

butts

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 75822.png, 355KiB, 532x617

Anonymous Thu 17 Dec 2015 00:49:49 No.25791353 Report

Quoted By: >>25798128

>>25780469

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 17 Dec 2015 02:45:12 No.25792679 Report

Quoted By:

>baaammpp

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 17 Dec 2015 02:46:56 No.25792688 Report

Quoted By:

hump

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO mlp_fim__excited_fluttershy_by_h (...).png, 165KiB, 800x1000

Anonymous Thu 17 Dec 2015 04:24:25 No.25793764 Report

Quoted By: >>25795581

>>25786628
Welp, now I've got to go back and re-read your story..

Seriously man, awesome to see more of this! My reaction when reading this was basically

>no..
>no it can't be
>...
>sweet fuck it is!

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 17 Dec 2015 07:46:10 No.25795581 Report

Quoted By:

>>25793764
bump

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 17 Dec 2015 11:05:30 No.25796621 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 17 Dec 2015 13:13:42 No.25797026 Report

Quoted By:

Bump

Anonymous

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Anonymous Thu 17 Dec 2015 17:28:32 No.25798128 Report

Quoted By: >>25801027 >>25802837

>>25791353

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1037658__twilight+sparkle_blushi (...).jpg, 904KiB, 1200x1200

Anonymous Thu 17 Dec 2015 17:29:32 No.25798140 Report

Quoted By:

Found some new art for you guys.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 17 Dec 2015 20:38:21 No.25799614 Report

Quoted By:

Up again.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 17 Dec 2015 22:16:02 No.25800511 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 17 Dec 2015 23:09:11 No.25801027 Report

Quoted By:

>>25798128

Sauce?

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 18 Dec 2015 00:57:27 No.25801996 Report

Quoted By: >>25802075 >>25802123 >>25804282

Im a bored writefag with a few minutes spare time on my mobile. Im willing to try an ultra-short one shot. Topics?

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 18 Dec 2015 01:04:25 No.25802075 Report

Quoted By: >>25804282

>>25801996
Anon shows AJ what kind of 'magic' fingers can do, when it comes to ropes.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 18 Dec 2015 01:08:41 No.25802123 Report

Quoted By: >>25804282

>>25801996
Anon loves applesauce and is vocal about it. Everyone in ponyville assumes he's using innnuendo.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 11870.png, 519KiB, 1280x1280

Anonymous Fri 18 Dec 2015 02:20:55 No.25802837 Report

Quoted By: >>25803657

>>25798128

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 772575.jpg, 265KiB, 900x2250

Anonymous Fri 18 Dec 2015 03:47:33 No.25803657 Report

Quoted By: >>25817728

>>25802837

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 18 Dec 2015 04:14:52 No.25803869 Report

Quoted By: >>25806854

>>25769976
there a pastebin for this story, cant find title or beginning.

Almost, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Almost, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Fri 18 Dec 2015 04:53:20 No.25804238 Report

Quoted By: >>25804243 >>25974189

>"Here's your dinner honey; I made it medium rare, just like you asked..."
>The forced smile is clear on Rarity's face.
>You know better than to honestly believe she enjoys making you steak dinners, but her she also knows that it’s one of your favorite meals.
"Just set it down on the table, I'll eat it in a moment."
>She nods, before setting it down, and crawling into the couch beside you.
"So... How was work today?"
>As usual, she tries to start a conversation.
>For any normal couple, this would be entirely routine behavior, but for you, it's just more evidence how badly things have gotten.
"It was fine."
>A long, stale moment of silence lingers as she waits for you to continue.
>You don't.
>"So... Did you make any big deals?"
>/Big deals./
>That's the full extent of her knowledge about what you do for a living.
>It doesn't surprise you.
>Rarity isn't exactly known for her brains.
>You sigh.
>Her renewed interest in your profession is far from genuine.
>"I don't make "deals" Rarity, I manage a hedge fund."
>She giggles awkwardly.
>"Oh... Haha... Well, did things go well today?"
>You take a sip of your wine, and flip the page of the financial report in your lap.
"As good as any other..."
>You aren't in any mood to actually hold a conversation with the mare beside you.
>Lord knows she couldn't wouldn't understand half the words that left your mouth anyways.
>Instead, you decide to at least /act/ interested her by asking some random question.
“How was the bouquet today?"
>She smiles hesitantly.
>"Oh... It went well; we had a few new customers..."
>You can't help but roll your eyes.
>You'd /hope/ she'd have some customers; she does run a business after all.
>Clearly noticing your disinterest, she tries her best to reel you back in.
>"The Canterlot Chronicles stopped by today; they want to interview me about my new spring lineup!"

Almost, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Almost, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Fri 18 Dec 2015 04:54:21 No.25804243 Report

Quoted By: >>25804254

>>25804238
>Her forced excitement let's you know that even she doesn't think that's a major achievement.
>No one reads the Canterlot Chronicles; it's practically discount wrapping paper.
>You don’t smile, and reply with a clearly unconcerned tone.
"That's exciting."
>…
>Taking another sip of your wine, you speak.
"I'm going out tonight."
>Her ears drop, and she sets her fork back into the salad she was eating.
>Both of you know exactly what “going out” means.
>"Oh..."
>Perhaps out of denial, she replies.
>"Is it a business meeting?"
>Shaking your head, you set the wine glass back into the table next to your meal.
"I'm meeting with a mare."
>You can practically see the defeat overtake her body.
>Her eyes begin to water.
>"I... I see..."
>Anger overtakes you at the sight of her despair.
>/She's/ upset?
>She /literally/ invited a stallion into /your/ house, and fucked him on /your/ bed, but /she's/ upset?
>”What time will you be getting back?”
>Closing the report, you check your watch for the time.
>It's 8:30pm.
"Don't know exactly, but it's time about to pick her up; I should get going."
>She leans forward.
>"But honey, you haven't even touched your dinner yet..."
>You stand.
"I didn't ask you to make dinner tonight Rarity, I'm going out to eat."
>"But sweetie, I made your favorite meal..."
"A meal which I didn't ask for."
>Your cold tone makes it clear this isn't a point of debate.
>She closes her eyes, trying her best to keep herself together.
>You stand up, and straighten your jacket.
"Make sure you have my suit ready for work tomorrow; you know I hate having to do that in the morning."
>She doesn't reply, only giving a slight nod as a tear falls onto the cushion below her.
>As you take a final sip of your still full wine glass, she manages to sputter out a few words.
>”Who… who are you going to see?”

Almost, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Almost, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Fri 18 Dec 2015 04:55:22 No.25804254 Report

Quoted By: >>25804282

>>25804243
>You pause.
>She’s never asked /who/ before.
>The simple fact that you were opening having an affair was enough for her suffer through.
>But asking for the mare’s name?
>This is… new.
>You think carefully about how to reply.
>Sure, you could tell her who it is.
>It wouldn’t hurt; it’s not like she could stop you from going anyways.
>But if she wants to know, that enough reason not to tell her.
“It doesn’t matter, you wouldn’t know her.”
>That of course, is a lie.
>She knows exactly who the mare is.
>…
>As you make your way out of the room she interrupts.
>”I’ll… I’ll be waiting for you to come back…”
>”Maybe we could… spend some time together?”
>You turn around.
“You mean you want to have sex.”
>She hates when you’re so overt with it.
>It makes her feel cheap, which is exactly what you do it.
>She nods.
>You snort, before turning around.
“I wouldn’t bother, I’m sure I’ll be getting home pretty late as it is; I’ll probably just go straight to bed…”
>She doesn’t answer; her eyes locked, simply staring into her salad.
>Her Tears stain her white fur cheeks.
>It gives you a moment to think, and for a split second, you almost feel guilty.
>…
>Almost.

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Fri 18 Dec 2015 04:58:20 No.25804282 Report

Quoted By: >>25804444 >>25804966 >>25805155 >>25807217 >>25974189

>>25804254
Done.

>>25802075
>>25802123
This (>>25801996) was me. I took an honest look at those prompts, but I'm terrible at comedy, and the magic fingers left me with a blank. so this "Almost" is what I came up with.

Comments, reviews, critiques, feedbacks, etc are welcome.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 18 Dec 2015 05:13:48 No.25804444 Report

Quoted By:

>>25804282
Well written but honestly not my brand of vodka. Still always nice to see something different.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 18 Dec 2015 06:14:27 No.25804966 Report

Quoted By: >>25807217

>>25804282
That was... painful to read. Not painful as in, it was bad writing so much as painful as in it was emotionally rough. Reminded me of a BAD END version of Empty Mansions to some degree. So short it's hard to form a more complex opinion, though.

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Fri 18 Dec 2015 06:40:32 No.25805155 Report

Quoted By:

>>25804282

I don't need this while I'm proofreading, Escapade.

What I do need now is a stiff drink. That was beautifully written in a heart-wrenching sort of way.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 18 Dec 2015 10:01:32 No.25806341 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 18 Dec 2015 12:00:41 No.25806854 Report

Quoted By:

>>25803869
Here you go, Anon: http://anonpone.pineapplecomputing.com/punishment/25552804

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 18 Dec 2015 13:06:54 No.25807217 Report

Quoted By:

>>25804282
seconding >>25804966, that was a rough exchange

Anonymous

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Anonymous Fri 18 Dec 2015 17:08:52 No.25808110 Report

Quoted By:

Olibird

Olibird Fri 18 Dec 2015 19:03:19 No.25808811 Report

Quoted By: >>25808827

>>25769976
>Once you two have recovered from your flight, you set out in the direction of your cave.
>Your sudden lack of a proper weapon means continuing your expedition is a bad idea...and you’ve already had enough bad ideas for one eternity.
>Even if it means you'll go hungry.
>At least you still have that pear you found. That fruit will be very useful in the long run.
>Cadance stays relatively quiet as she trudges along at your side.
>Apparently a brush with death kills her good mood.
>That’s something she’ll have to get used to, if she’s going to be with you for a while.
>As you two are about to crest a jagged hill, she finally speaks up,
>”So...you said there were changelings in this place?”
“Hmm?”
>You jerk out of your stupor, having been walking and scanning the skies on autopilot.
>”Back there...before the...thing attacked. You said there were changelings here? How can you tell if something’s a changeling? We’ve never been able to get a detection spell working.”
>You chuckle.
“Hooo yea, there’s two competing hives in this place. One was here before I was, and the other started when a new queen was banished a few centuries ago. She and I were actually a couple for a while.”
>Cadance gives you a dirty look, “How could you associate with those things? One of them tried to kill me, my friends AND mind controlled my fiancé!”
>You grin.
>Apparently a talkative Cadance is an argumentative Cadance.
>...There’s a sexist joke in there somewhere, but you’ll be damned if you can’t remember it.
“Well, by ‘couple,’ I mean she fed off me for a few decades and then laid eggs inside of me. Apparently that was enough of a turnoff to ruin my ability to be a food source.”
“But, to answer your question, typically you can tell by the way they...gryphon! Move!”
>Your eyes lock onto the silhouette above you.
>With a yank to Cadance’s leash, the two of you make a mad dash towards a nearby pile of rocks.

Olibird

Olibird Fri 18 Dec 2015 19:04:41 No.25808827 Report

Quoted By: >>25808837 >>25974189

>>25808811
>It’s not much, but hopefully it’ll keep you two from being spotted.
>Peaking out from behind it, you see the catbird circle rather close to you, before gliding down towards an oasis at the bottom of the hill.
“Oh no…”
>”What?” There’s a tinge of panic in Cadance’s voice, “What is it, Master?”
>Hey, there wasn’t any hesitation that time.
>Once the gryphon’s below your altitude, you give her leash a gentle tug.
“Come here, Cadance. It’s safe, but you need to be quiet.”
>With great trepidation she obeys, almost leaning against you as you bring her over to a rocky ledge.
>Crouching down, you point at the gryphon’s haggard form, just as it touchs down before the pond.
“See where he’s landing?”
>Your guest nods, her eyes the size of dinner plates.
>...You think anyway. It’s been a long time since you’ve had dishes of any kind.
“There’s a pack of Orthruses that live by that oasis. That’s why we’re going around. And they know he’s there...see? There’s one right there, one there, and one behind that bush. He has no idea…”
>You point out each of the shadows.
>”We can’t just let them attack him! We have to help!” She stage-whispers to you, panic gripping her every word.
“With what WEAPON, Cadance? I had to give up my spear the LAST time you wanted to help something. Which, by the way, unless you know of an unguarded source of obsidian around here, I’m not replacing any time soon.”
>”Why don’t we warn him? He can fly away!” Cadance opens her mouth and takes a deep breath.
>Shit!
>In a rather ungraceful move, you dive towards her, shooting out your hand and grab her snout, forcing her mouth closed before you land belly first before her.
>Pretending you didn’t just almost fall off the cliff, you pull her head down to you.
“Are you stupid?! Or is it just that we’re STILL NOT DEAD, and you just want to finish the job you started earlier?”

Olibird

Olibird Fri 18 Dec 2015 19:05:44 No.25808837 Report

Quoted By: >>25808849 >>25974189

>>25808827
“You call out, they ALL hear you, and they come right after us. I KNOW you can’t outrun an Orthrus.”
>Climbing to a squat, you pull out the gag you had made earlier, still holding her mouth shut.
“Muzzle. Now.”
>You glare at her, making sure she understands that there will be no discussion on this.
>Tears well up in her eyes, but she nods her head, the look on her face reminiscent of a child being scolded.
>Replacing your hand with the rawhide muzzle, you begin tying the straps to the back of her head.
“There is NOTHING we can do here, Cadance. Nothing we can do for anyone. The best you can ever hope for, here, is to learn the traps and be left alone.”
>With the muzzle secure, Cadance reluctantly nods, the unfortunate truth settling in her mind with each movement of her head, and stands up.
>Her hooves are heavy with dejection as she starts trudging away to continue your journey.
>You, however, make no motion to follow, her leash soon pulling taut.
>”Mm?” Cadance looks back at you questioningly.
>You shake your head and point at the ground by your side.
“Sit.”
>She looks back, her eyes wavering.
>She obviously wants to say no...but the last time she refused an order is still fresh in her mind.
>The stern expression on your face helps her recent trauma win out.
>With her head low, she returns to her previous position, sitting next to you like a dog.
>Looking down, you see the Orthruses are closing in on the gryphon, who’s too busy greedily gulping down water to recognize how much danger its in.
>You grab Cadance by her horn and pull her head down, making sure she’s looking at the scene that’s about to unfold..
>She whimpers and tenses up, her sides quivering.
“I want you to realize something, Cadance. If you didn’t have a guide, there’d be nothing stopping this from being you.”
>Squeezing her eyes shut, her horn pulls against your hand’s firm grip as she tries to shake her head no.

Olibird

Olibird Fri 18 Dec 2015 19:07:04 No.25808849 Report

Quoted By: >>25808860

>>25808837
>You stroke your hand over her furred cheek as you watch the pack of monsters ready their attack.
>Three…
>Two…
>One…
>With your hand still resting on her cheek, you use two fingers to pull her eye open.
>Cadance tenses up hard against you, pulling to try and free her horn, to look away.
>But you’re unyielding, forcing her to watch as...there they are!
>The trio of beasts leap out of the bushes down below and pounce on the unsuspecting gryphon.
>”Hrrrrrmmmhh!” Cadance’s scream of horror is dwarfed by the gryphon’s screech and the canine barking echoing off the hills as they start to play with their food, having already mangled the gryphon’s wings.
>You look away and instead concentrate on holding your guest still as her hooves scrabble at the rock, her wings flapping, and all the while she keeps screaming.
>Yea, you’ve seen this happen more times than anyone ever should, but that doesn’t make it any easier.
>Plus...you still haven’t gotten to the bad part.
>Your guest eventually stops struggling, having realized just how futile it is, when she’s being held this way.
>You make sure to occasionally ‘blink’ her eye for her...you don’t want anything to distract her from what’s coming.
>Sure enough, it soon starts.
>”Help! Someone, please! Someone! Help meee!”
>The gryphon screams out below, having been cornered.
>Cadance’s ears press to the back of her head, and she looks at you out of the corner of her tear filled eye, begging.
“You were about ready to abandon him, Cadance, and NOW you want to help him? Even if I had my spear, we missed our chance. It’s too late, now. There’s nothing we can do.”
>”Anyone?! Help! Please! Help!”
>Turning Cadance’s head slightly so she can’t peek at you anymore, you look away, partly in shame.

Olibird

Olibird Fri 18 Dec 2015 19:08:16 No.25808860 Report

Quoted By: >>25808868

>>25808849
>Despite spending the past millennium or more, here...that part of you that wants to do the right thing, that wants to help someone in need has never died.
>You just know better than to listen to it right now.
>The gryphon’s next call for help is cut off by a primal scream as the Orthruses properly attack, tearing into him.
>Cadance screams again and again as she’s forced to watch every last detail, the muzzle keeping her horrified vocalizations relatively quiet.
>Eventually, their screams stop, for two vastly different reasons.
>Cadance’s devolve into wordless sobbing and she presses into your side.
>Letting go of her, you wrap your arms around her withers, hugging the pink pony the best you can.
>You don’t offer any verbal comfort.
>It’s not like you can tell her things will be ok.
>While she leans into that hug, still crying, she doesn’t look away...is she still obeying your command, or is this the pony equivalent of rubbernecking?
>Eventually, the monsters below finish their meal, leaving...not much left of the gryphon.
>Cadance looks at you, having cried herself out.
>Her bloodshot eyes beg you to let her leave.
>You shake your head.
“Not yet. Keep watching.”
>With great reluctance, Cadance tears her head from you to look back at the mostly skeletal remains down below.
>The gryphon moves.

Olibird

Olibird Fri 18 Dec 2015 19:09:18 No.25808868 Report

Quoted By: >>25809329 >>25809916 >>25810261 >>25810531 >>25811007 >>25819293

>>25808860
>The bones of its foreleg, held together only by bits of sinew, claw at the ground, pulling what’s left of the gryphon along.
>”Mmmmmmmrrrr...” Cadance moans out, her quaking forelegs wrapping around you.
>She keeps watching, obeying your command.
>Down below, the gryphon uses its only other ‘intact’ limb to aid its foreclaw, helping to push it along.
>Your guest continues to whimper wordlessly, soon turning her head away, burying it in your chest.
>Checking first to make sure your guest’s continued crying hasn’t attracted any unwanted attention, you undo the muzzle.
>”Why is he…how is...” She can’t bring herself to finish the question, instead just burying herself against you.
You stroke a hand over her mane.
“Still alive? It’s because he’s not ALLOWED to die. None of us are. Celestia and Luna took that privilege from each and every one of us.”
>Gently, you guide her by her snout until she’s looking at him again.
“He’s going to regrow everything. It’ll be excruciatingly painful, it’ll take a year, if not more, but it will. I know from experience. And you can thank your aunts for that.”
>She pulls away from your touch, covering her face with her hooves.
>”They-they wouldn’t-couldn’t, they-they don’t know!”
“But they do. Remember the chat I had with them, when you landed here? They weren’t surprised. The only thing they didn’t know was how long I would have otherwise lived for.”
>Gingerly, you go back to stroking her mane.
“This is why I’m protecting you. You’re innocent. You’re as much of a victim as the gryphon.”
>Her hooves slowly lower and she looks up at you, her eyes betraying her tortured psyche.
>The reality of just how horrible the situation is finally hitting her.
>It’s a look you’ve seen countless times.
>”Thank you...m-master. I won’t...I...I’ll do whatever you want me to. I’m sorry for...arguing before.”
>You pull her against you and squeeze her in a bear hug.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 18 Dec 2015 20:07:38 No.25809329 Report

Quoted By:

>>25808868
W-we did it? Holy shit we sorta did it. Also we should find something for cadance. She may understand now but we're also torturing her with her aunts cries. This will lead her to fight back again. We need to get her ear muffs or something for when we have sessions. Also what should we do now? Do we have food for ourselves or shit what do we do?

Our spear is gone, We are devoid of food right now for ourselves

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 18 Dec 2015 21:21:38 No.25809916 Report

Quoted By:

>>25808868
Score one for the home team.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 18 Dec 2015 22:00:01 No.25810261 Report

Quoted By: >>25810332

>>25808868
This is good.

Cadance has finally learned her place and knows that nothing we do is be worse than what others /will/ do to her if we kick her out, so it's safe to assume that she won't be trying to run away any longer.

What worries me is the impact it will have on her. She might become suicidal after a trauma like this. Sure, she can't actually kill herself, but she might become careless because "things don't matter to her anymore" and get the rest of us in danger.

She will also most likely stop protecting Luna and Celestia, or at least do it with much less force. The problem is... how will Luna see this? Celestia already hates us so it doesn't matter.. But from Luna' PoV we left the cave with her beloved innocent niece, niece and came back with a broken shell of a pony.

She's going to blame us for that. Whatever progress we had with Luna is now gone, and even if we get Cadance to blame it on Luna for creating this place, instead of blaming it on us for showing it to her, Luna will feel like we stole her niece from her, and she's going to side with her sister against instead of us. Yeah, she might feel partially guilty about it too... but WE are the one's who made it impact Cadance so we'll be the bad guy in her eyes.

I think we should talk with Cadance about how we want to break the news to her aunts in a way that will cause the least collateral damage. Also, we should use this opportunity so establish a new, firmer and stricter set of rules for Cadance to obey. Her shock is not going to last forever, and we need to strike the iron while it's hot.

>what do
If the Orthruses are gone, we should go get what's left of the gryphon. Bone marrow is edible (and delicious) and bones can be made into tools, including brand new spears. Just make sure that Cadance understands that we're doing this to protect her from meeting the same fate, and that the fault for it is on her aunts, for creating a place like his.

After that, go home, It's been a long day.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 18 Dec 2015 22:07:17 No.25810332 Report

Quoted By:

>>25810261
Also, don't take the whole gryphon, but leave the head there (I'm assuming that that's the part from which he's going to regrow), we don't want anyone to know where we live.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 18 Dec 2015 22:27:35 No.25810531 Report

Quoted By:

>>25808868
Dayum. I'd completely forgotten about the whole can't-die-in-Tartarus thing until Anon brought it up again. Pretty damn brutal.

Well, I think we've driven home that point now. Time to get home and - at the least - drop her off before going out and looking for some supplies for us.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 18 Dec 2015 23:11:58 No.25811007 Report

Quoted By:

>>25808868
"It's not your fault Cadance. You just didn't understand before."

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Fri 18 Dec 2015 23:56:33 No.25811452 Report

Quoted By: >>25812948 >>25813203 >>25816574

I /might/ have a /brief/ AnoNMM one-shot coming up here.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 19 Dec 2015 01:41:52 No.25812496 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 19 Dec 2015 02:25:33 No.25812948 Report

Quoted By:

>>25811452
>hype

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 19 Dec 2015 02:46:32 No.25813203 Report

Quoted By:

>>25811452
We will be waiting.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 19 Dec 2015 04:31:50 No.25814273 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 19 Dec 2015 06:04:35 No.25815266 Report

Quoted By:

>Olibird posts and upcoming NMM from Escapade
what a lovely day

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 19 Dec 2015 08:11:49 No.25816574 Report

Quoted By:

>>25811452
oooh

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 901469.jpg, 349KiB, 1932x2183

Anonymous Sat 19 Dec 2015 12:32:17 No.25817728 Report

Quoted By: >>25818031 >>25827455

>>25803657

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 19 Dec 2015 14:07:28 No.25818031 Report

Quoted By: >>25822137

>>25817728
>magical breast growth
>inflicting lactation on ponies
>forcing them to become reliant on you for release
Uhhhh. . . Wow. That's an unexpected boner.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 19 Dec 2015 16:44:08 No.25818827 Report

Quoted By:

Olibird

Olibird Sat 19 Dec 2015 17:52:29 No.25819293 Report

Quoted By: >>25819309

>>25808868
“It’s not your fault, Cadance. You just didn’t understand, before.”
>You simply hold her, letting her process the fate she’s been condemned to.
>At the same time, you keep an eye on the gryphon’s path...just in case your next hunt goes as badly as the last two.
>However, there’s no reason to keep Cadance out here with you any longer, and you’ll be able to hunt more effectively without something escorting someone with big, noisy hooves.
>Just how exposed your position is, is starting to bug you.
>Placing both hands on her withers, you take a step back.
“You feel alright enough to head home?”
>She slowly nods, her eyes looking through you, rather than at you.
“Alright. Come on, then.”
>You give a gentle tug at her leash, prompting her to shamble along beside you.
>Heh.
>If you weren’t guiding her, she’d probably just keep walking until she hit a wall.
>As the two of you slowly but surely make your way home, she eventually speaks up, asking the question that’s on the mind of every single being sentenced to Tartarus,
>”Why did aunt Celestia and auntie Luna do this…?”
>Despite knowing it was coming, you let out a harsh laugh.
“You have no idea how many times others have asked me that same question...minus the ‘aunt’ bits. But...you might be the first one who ever gets an answer. Just uh...I want to be there when you do.”
>”Ok, master.”
>That quiets your guest again, allowing you to complete your journey in peace.
>Once you’ve navigated through your trap field, you stop your companion again, kneeling down to meet her at eye level.
“So. I’m giving you a job, Cadance. I just want you to watch this time, but from now on, when I go out, I’m going to need you to cover my tracks. Do you think you can do that?”
>She nods, her eyes still gazing past you, more than they are at you.

Olibird

Olibird Sat 19 Dec 2015 17:54:05 No.25819309 Report

Quoted By: >>25819332

>>25819293
>You know there’s no way she'll absorb this right now...but it’s another one of those things she has to learn.
>Opening the ‘door’ and retrieving your rake, you get to work, while still making sure your guest watches you.
>Once more, you find your thoughts wandering.
>With Cadance...complacent, there’s nothing to stop you from getting to work on ‘educating’ her aunts as you had originally planned.
>But showing her off to them right now would be a bad idea.
>It could ruin any progress you’ve made with Luna...and Celestia would probably try and dislocate her spine to get out of the cage to ‘murder’ you.
>Perhaps you’ve reached the step in your recipe where you let everything rest.
>With your work completed, you guide Cadance into the cave, your companion having remained immobile where you left her.
>Relieving her of her physical burden, you finally untie the leash.
“We’ve had a long day, don’t you think? I’ll distribute what we've gathered tomorrow, you should go rest in your room.”
>”O-ok master,” comes her far off reply, her hooves shuffling under her to obey your command.
>You, in turn, get to work on freeing the net from the fruits of your labor, literal and metaphorical.
>You can’t fix the thing if it’s still being used, after all.
>When she reaches the turn-off for her room, Cadance looks back. “Thank you, master. For rescuing me and...taking me in, and everything.”
>You give her a warm smile, standing up from your work.
“I do what I can. Besides, you’d do the same for me, wouldn’t you?”
>She pauses for a moment.
>She obviously realises the significance behind your question...but the gears in her head are a bit jammed at the moment.
>When she responds, the words come slowly, “Of...course I would, master. You’ve done so much for me, even after I fought you…”
“All’s forgiven Cadance.”
>She starts shuffling around that corner.

Olibird

Olibird Sat 19 Dec 2015 17:56:26 No.25819332 Report

Quoted By: >>25819339

>>25819309
>Only her rear is visible when it hits you.
>The question you had PLANNED to ask her, before.
>The question that would verify every word that's came out of Luna’s.
“Oh! Hang on, before you go.”
>You jog over to her, your guest looking up at you, “Yes, master?”
“Earlier today, back in front of Celestia, what did Luna mouth to you? I was at the wrong angle to see.”
>Your guest averts her deep purple eyes, looking down at her hooves.
>“She said...I think she said something like, ‘not without magic, Cadance.’ I think she was talking about turning back intto Nightmare Moon?”
>...Well then.
>That answers that question.
>Luna claims she asked Cadance to play along, Cadance claims Luna was all but turned.
>Somehow you doubt Cadance is still lying to you, after what she just went through.
“Thank you. She said the same thing to me.”
>You bend down and hug her.
“Let me know if you need anything, alright?”
>”I-I will...thank you again.”
>You turn your attention back to what you’ve gathered, soon freeing your net and the few small victuals you’ve found for yourself, and, after attending to the fire, bring them to your room.
>Sitting down on your mat-bed, you get to work on repairing your net, sacrificing a few lengths of your vine.
>You’d LOVE to grab ‘materials’ from the other princesses, but you don’t have the inclination to have a ‘proper’ session with them, after earlier.
>While you managed to avoid showing any major sign of weakness in front of your guest, you’re still dead tired.
>After all, this was your SECOND excursion in one day.
>You never do that.
>Tying the lengths of vine into your net, in a way that won’t cause them to break the moment they’re stressed, is slow, careful work.
>It’s nothing physically demanding, so there’s nothing to break the wave of weariness as it washes over you.
>Your eyelids feel heavy as you near completion.
>You just need to tie a few more strands…

Olibird

Olibird Sat 19 Dec 2015 17:57:36 No.25819339 Report

Quoted By: >>25819346

>>25819332
-
>The sound of hooves tear you from your dreams, your eyes snapping open.
>Something made it inside your home!
>Abandoning whatever it was you were working on, you scrabble around, looking for your spear.
>...It’s gone.
>Ooohh, that’s not good, you’re in trouble.
>They already found you...but you aren’t tied down?
>Running your hands over you, you find your knife, still tied to your thigh.
>Good...whoever this is, they’re an idiot.
>With a quick check to see if they’re alone, you see they’ve inexplicably closed the door behind them.
>Nothing about this makes sense,
>You creep down the cave, towards the sound of hoofsteps, your heart pounding in your chest.
>Let's see...particularly dumb changeling, or centaur?
>It’s gotta be one of those...anything else would have disabled you properly.
>Whatever they are, you aren’t about to let them take YOUR cave from you.
>You’ve put too much hard work into this to give it up to one monster,
>You approach whatever’s wandering through your halls as it nears the back of the cave.
>Clutching your knife, you raise it high.
>You’re going to FEAST, today.
>Whirling around a corner you see the back of...a pink pony?
>...Oh.
>Oh!

Olibird

Olibird Sat 19 Dec 2015 17:58:40 No.25819346 Report

Quoted By: >>25819558 >>25819634 >>25819727 >>25824472 >>25824546 >>25854410

>>25819339
>The events of the past day hit you like a rock to the face.
>Right!
>That’s not an intruder, that’s Cadance, your hostage-guest!
>...You were about to flay her alive.
>That...that probably wouldn’t have helped your case with her at all.
>You clasp your hand over your face.
>You really are a paranoid idiot sometimes, aren’t you?
>...Where is she going? She passed the stream a while ago.
>Well.
>You’re already shadowing her. May as well see what she’s up to.
>Your guest continues heading down the back of the cave, hanging a left to head towards...Luna’s room.
>Trailing her, you stay just around the corner as she enters her aunt’s room.
>You really should stop her.
>If Luna sees her like this, it could undo the progress you’ve made with the elder alicorn.
>”You...told me you wanted to see me, Auntie?’ Cadance’s voice is still as traumatized as earlier.
>...Then again…
>This might be the only way to figure out what Luna’s game is.
>Is this a gamble you want to make?

Caffeine 40k

Caffeine 40k Sat 19 Dec 2015 18:26:27 No.25819558 Report

Quoted By: >>25854599

>>25819346
I have no idea what choice we should take.

What it probably is that Luna is probably trying to play us.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 19 Dec 2015 18:37:20 No.25819634 Report

Quoted By: >>25819663 >>25819917 >>25820356 >>25854599

>>25819346
Shit. hm....
We don't actually know that we've made ANY progress with the Alicorn.
Second, we could easily make the comment that with 4 mouths to feed, we needed another person to help with the gathering. It wasn't optional. Did they think Cadence would be here? HERE??? in hell and never see what lies here?

They insult Cadence's strength of will, and their own intelligence. We are not wondering the waste for days at a time making multiple trips to gather enough foliage, and THEN doing the energy intensive hunt for food.

If Luna wants to give us shit we can shut her the FUCK down. We should be worried about Celestia. We still want to break her, and she's still unreasonable right now, we don't need to give her ammo to shore up her obstinance.

It should be a concern that Luna could have telepathy, cause how the fuck did Luna call Cadance over?

Also this entire thing could be a ruse as well.
We need to walk a fine balance of healthy suspicion and relaxation. We'll wear ourselves thin with this. We need to listen in.

We only gain, but for the love of fuck stay back enough that they can't hear us. Those god damn sensitive ears man. The only reason we might be safe right now is because Cadance is recovering mentally and probably doesn't care that we are following or isn't paying attention.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 19 Dec 2015 18:41:38 No.25819663 Report

Quoted By: >>25819699 >>25819917 >>25820356 >>25854599

>>25819634
We cannot let Luna hear though. Activate the god damn stealth mode, but also when Cadence is coming out depending on how it goes what we want to do may change.

But we should be casual, don't scramble away or try to hide as she comes back out. We can't display that kind of patheticness. Stay there casually as if you had all the right in the god damn world, which we do its our house and we were concerned what might be the matter with our guest.

Also did we ever tell her she can't meet them without us present? We should really start hashing out rules. Its something we'll have to get back to in the morning or when she's more herself.

We also need reasons behind these rules.

Caffeine 40k

Caffeine 40k Sat 19 Dec 2015 18:47:02 No.25819699 Report

Quoted By: >>25820356

>>25819663
The thing is we only planted the seed of doubt into Cadance, but have yet to actually secure her unquestionable loyalty.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 19 Dec 2015 18:49:20 No.25819727 Report

Quoted By: >>25819917 >>25854599

>>25819346
This is a straight risk-reward scenario, and for my money the greater return is to listen in as opposed to breaking it up. Even if we were to break it up by making noise and "accidentally" walking in on them, it'd still make them skittish.

Better to listen in unobserved, and let them begin to build thier confidence. This will allow us to hear what Luna has to say to Cadence, which hopefully will give us an idea on how to proceed ahead with both of them.

Sure, we may suffer some kind of setback with Luna once she sees Cadence and observes her behavior, but it's worth it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 19 Dec 2015 19:16:50 No.25819917 Report

Quoted By: >>25820330

>>25819634
>>25819663
>>25819727
These are smart suggestions and I'm on board with them. We need to listen in, but be careful.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 19 Dec 2015 20:23:43 No.25820330 Report

Quoted By: >>25820356 >>25854599

>>25819917
Yo thanks anon. Oli's cyoa is the first one i've been super active in. I usually make 2-3 suggestions a post (except for last one)

Its really validating to hear you think well of them.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 19 Dec 2015 20:26:37 No.25820356 Report

Quoted By: >>25854599

>>25819699
Also me again>>25820330
>>25819634
>>25819663
You make a good point. We should hold off on the rules. I really like that she's kinda the closest thing we have to a friend right now. How it developed on our excursion with her was really nice. She should continue to join us, life and death situations tend to bond people.

We can't just hole her away forever like her aunts.

The dynamic is so interesting!

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 19 Dec 2015 21:44:54 No.25821077 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 19 Dec 2015 23:36:48 No.25822137 Report

Quoted By: >>25822829

>>25818031
I want it

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 00:42:38 No.25822829 Report

Quoted By: >>25822954

>>25822137
The story or my boner; I can only give you one. And it ain't green.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 00:52:32 No.25822954 Report

Quoted By:

>>25822829
I feel the wrath of the green weenie quite often thank you.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 02:15:43 No.25823830 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 03:10:06 No.25824472 Report

Quoted By: >>25854599

>>25819346
Stay quiet and listen. Luna lied to us anyway, so she's already not on our side, so we can't loose her. If she later blames us for what we did to Cadance, we can simply say that /we/ didn't do anything, we merely showed Cadance what /she/ did to everyone in Tartarus. Funny thing is, we are a murderer, but we still have moral high ground over Luna.

Also, we /did/ tell Cadance that we want to be there when she asks her aunts why they did this, and I think that that's exactly what she's going to ask her so... we're just doing what she agreed to.

That said, I think we have really underestimated Luna. She played us to get us to treat the nicely. All the talk we made about Celestia being willing to abandon Luna? Hah! Luna has been doing that the whole time, throwing all the blame on her sister, knowing that Celestia hates us too much to tell us anything. Luna knew exactly what she was doing when she sent us here, it wasn't "I was obeying my sister", she told that lie so that we would punish her with spanking instead of breaking her legs.

So, engage sneak mode, and listen in. We'll make a new plan what to do once we know where each of them stands.

Also, about Cadance. Assuming she really is as innocent and shocked as she appears. I think we should invite her to sleep with us... non-sexually, of course. Yeah i know we're paranoid, but it would be nice to cuddle with someone that won't try to lay eggs in us when the're done.

Yeah I know she has a husband, but wouldn't he want her to stay safe and close to someone that can protect her? It's not cheating, to admit that she needs someone right now. Shining is not here right now, and her aunts are bigger monsters than Anon is. It's only logical for her to cuddle with us.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 03:15:19 No.25824546 Report

Quoted By: >>25824756

>>25819346
Is there a pastebin for this? (I've been away for awhile, just catching up now)

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 03:35:05 No.25824756 Report

Quoted By: >>25824874

>>25824546
I'll do you one better.
Check it
http://anonpone.pineapplecomputing.com/punishment/25552804

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 03:46:07 No.25824874 Report

Quoted By: >>25824953 >>25825030 >>25825090

>>25824756
I legitimately don't get the point of this site. Seems actually somewhat less convenient then just reading through the archives (and far less so than a pastebin).

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 03:53:17 No.25824953 Report

Quoted By: >>25825030 >>25825110 >>25825226

>>25824874
>I legitimately don't get the point of this site.
It lets you see the responses to the posts and if it was a CYOA with art, it'd show each picture that the posts, without having to dig through bumps and other discussion.

That said, here's the pastebin: http://pastebin.com/uY83evb2
He's just been a lazy fuck and hasn't added the updates from this thread, yet.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 04:00:08 No.25825030 Report

Quoted By: >>25825226

>>25824953
>>25824874
Yeah sorry man. The discussion has been where its at. That's why I gave you that one. Lets you be a part of what lead to this.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 04:05:56 No.25825090 Report

Quoted By: >>25825226

>>25824874
This was my initial impression as well. Having to click/press the arrow key for every new post is a huge pain in the ass if you're just looking to read the story. It does have some merit if you want to kinda re-live the whole thing (i.e. the discussion).

That said, it does have the ability to dump everything as text. It's a bit hidden, but click on the "downloads" link, then CYOA TXT (or just go here: http://cs.pineapplecomputing.com/files/thread/punishment?type=text

And if you're a linux nerd, you can use something like the following to make it a bit more readable: sed -i -re 's/^\[[01-9]*\]$//g' <the file>

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 04:07:21 No.25825110 Report

Quoted By: >>25825226

>>25824953
>It lets you see the responses
>without discussion.
This is literally the most useless site in all of known universe.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 04:18:31 No.25825226 Report

Quoted By: >>25854264

>>25824953
>>25825030
>>25825090
>>25825110
I can _kinda_ see the point, but honestly this isn't AoE, it's easy enough to read through the archives if you want to see all the discussion.

I mean it's a cool concept and all, but doesn't do much for me.

Also I have no idea how this would handle cases where the author forgets to trip or similar (I'm guessing it doesn't).

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 06:55:54 No.25826706 Report

Quoted By:

Emergency Bump

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 633022.png, 210KiB, 425x724

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 09:01:52 No.25827455 Report

Quoted By: >>25830250

>>25817728

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 13:12:06 No.25828340 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1440531286951.jpg, 105KiB, 800x798

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 15:52:01 No.25829025 Report

Quoted By: >>25831090

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 17:31:58 No.25829542 Report

Quoted By:

>bampsies

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1450299093947.png, 656KiB, 1000x749

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 19:05:24 No.25830250 Report

Quoted By: >>25837967

>>25827455

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 877993__solo_monochrome_solo+fem (...).png, 1MiB, 1024x768

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 20:59:32 No.25831090 Report

Quoted By:

>>25829025
Ah, that one. One of my favorites. Have another of Sunnybuns.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 703134__solo_queen+chrysalis_pix (...).jpg, 833KiB, 1840x2472

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 22:07:11 No.25831751 Report

Quoted By:

Found an image of bugbutt I haven't seen yet, and it's a damn good one.
>But leash in a situation where she can't stand up makes no sense
...shut up, a boner is a boner.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1033017__solo_solo+female_clothe (...).png, 545KiB, 1233x1024

Anonymous Sun 20 Dec 2015 22:28:50 No.25831990 Report

Quoted By: >>25835179 >>25835479 >>25839183

>Posted the wrong picture.
Let's try this again.

Found an image of bugbutt I haven't seen yet, and it's a damn good one.
>But leash in a situation where she can't stand up makes no sense
...shut up, a boner is a boner.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 21 Dec 2015 00:15:37 No.25833075 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 21 Dec 2015 01:42:21 No.25833966 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 21 Dec 2015 02:46:36 No.25834676 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1390343620815.jpg, 178KiB, 1600x1067

Anonymous Mon 21 Dec 2015 02:47:56 No.25834694 Report

Quoted By:

bump

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 21 Dec 2015 03:34:24 No.25835179 Report

Quoted By: >>25836433

>>25831990
>But leash in a situation where she can't stand up makes no sense
She can still crawl. That's good enough.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 21 Dec 2015 04:04:53 No.25835479 Report

Quoted By: >>25836433

>>25831990
>But leash in a situation where she can't stand up makes no sense

Obviously she's begging her master to take her for a walk.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 21 Dec 2015 05:33:58 No.25836433 Report

Quoted By:

>>25835179
>>25835479
>Tugging the leash to make Chrysalis squirm across the floor towards you.
As if I needed to be any harder...

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 21 Dec 2015 06:35:13 No.25836986 Report

Quoted By:

One last bump before bed.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1048148.png, 437KiB, 1280x1247

Anonymous Mon 21 Dec 2015 09:35:53 No.25837967 Report

Quoted By: >>25838744

>>25830250

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1025892.png, 914KiB, 3000x4458

Anonymous Mon 21 Dec 2015 12:11:25 No.25838744 Report

Quoted By: >>25852274

>>25837967

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 21 Dec 2015 14:17:13 No.25839183 Report

Quoted By: >>25974189

>>25831990
We need a continuation of the Chrysalis slave story, the one where Anon kept her alive by feeding her untargeted Love Poison before getting her to break herself and drink Love Poison with Anon as the target, thereby ensuring she would never be able to betray him.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 21 Dec 2015 18:07:24 No.25840345 Report

Quoted By:

Emergency bump.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 21 Dec 2015 20:22:19 No.25841247 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 559021__solo_monochrome_solo+fem (...).jpg, 55KiB, 384x500

Anonymous Mon 21 Dec 2015 22:01:41 No.25842144 Report

Quoted By:

Up we go again.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 21 Dec 2015 23:25:35 No.25842880 Report

Quoted By:

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Mon 21 Dec 2015 23:39:53 No.25842987 Report

Quoted By: >>25843811

>Update
Did a near complete re-write of the AnoNMM one-shot, but I'm confident it's near completion now. It's short, but it should be posted later tonight.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 22 Dec 2015 01:08:30 No.25843811 Report

Quoted By:

>>25842987
>hyped

Tarnished Flowers, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Tarnished Flowers, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Tue 22 Dec 2015 01:50:35 No.25844174 Report

Quoted By: >>25844188

>You are Nightmare Moon.
>Empress of the Equestrian Empire.
>…
>Currently, you find yourself sharing a simple dinner with your Brute in your sitting room.
>Such opportunities have become rare in recent weeks, given the increase in rebellious activities in Manehattan, and the Baltimare.
>However, earlier this evening, you received official word that the regional rebel leader, Burning Torch, was captured, and is being transported to the castle as you speak.
>In celebration of this minor triumph, your Brute has ordered a roast from the kitchen’s chiefs.
>To smell the aroma of cooked meat as you entered your apartments, and to see your Champion waiting for you…
>It was difficult to suppress your excitement.
>Your Brute’s simple mind did not normally permit him to make such nuanced, supportive gestures.
>To think he had seen your stress, and taken steps, however minor, to comfort you…
>It was truly appreciated.
>…
>Sinking the sharp blade into the flesh snaps you back to reality.
>Cutting yourself a lean slice of meat, you pierce it with your fork, and lift it into your mouth; placing it onto your tongue.
>The juicy, cool flesh lays on your tongue; it’s savory favor instantly filling your mouth, and nearly overburdening your senses.
>Meat was a delicacy that you were rarely permitted to enjoy.
>Excluding the occasional Griffon, or other immigrant community, meat simply was simply not part of the average Equestrians’ diet.
>…
>You look across, and see your Brute who is consuming a much thicker slice flesh.

Tarnished Flowers, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Tarnished Flowers, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Tue 22 Dec 2015 01:52:30 No.25844188 Report

Quoted By: >>25844195

>>25844174
>With the arrival of your Champion and his more… carnivorous tendencies… you’ve had many more opportunities to enjoy roast, and other similar meals.
>He, after discovering your own enjoyment, occasionally shared such meals with you.
>On this particular evening, he went so far as to personally prepare the food.
>With these small testaments of... courtship, you couldn't help but feel desired - wanted.
>To think that your Brute was so loyal, and so dedicated to your will…
>It pleased you greatly.
>…
>Your mind returns to the present.
>Using your napkin, you gently clean your snout, before speaking.
”Tell us Brute, how come the preparations for the Monument in Ponyville?
>Being back into the routine was quite relieving.
>Having conversations over dinner was always a relaxing affair.
>Swallowing his food, your Brute replies.
>”It’s coming along well; I think we’re about two weeks from the event if I recall correctly…”
>You smile, and retrieve another morsel of meat.
“We’re trust that it is moving along according to schedule?”
>He sighs, placing his fork down.
>”For the most part; although some of the locals are being problematic.”
>You raise in eyebrow.
”Oh?”
>He nods.
>”The local mayor - Mayor Mare - has been collaborating with some local businesses, and delaying progress on a few of the lesser projects.
>He waives his hand in the air.
>”Flowers — food — those sorts of things.”
>Intrigued, you reply.
“We assume you have some scheme to correct these… deficiencies?”
>He nods.

Tarnished Flowers, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Tarnished Flowers, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Tue 22 Dec 2015 01:53:31 No.25844195 Report

Quoted By: >>25844204

>>25844188
>”Of course, I’m probably going to order someone down there tomorrow to make a visit, and “encourage” them to complete what they were instructed to do.”
>You giggle, before taking another sip of wine.
>His finger motions upon saying “encourage…”
>You believe he called them "air quotes.”
>Clearly “encourage” is quite an understatement.
>”But other than those few areas, things are coming along nicely; the statues we commissioned are almost done, and should be completed this week.”
>…
>You smile.
“Tell us Brute; who do you intend to communicate your concerns?”
“If you wish, you may utilize one of our younger diplomats or guard officers; certainly they could learn from the experience…”
>He shakes his head.
>”I already have someone in mind.”
>Your ears flick forward.
>He has already made a decision?
“Pray tell Brute, who have you appointed?”
>He chuckles, and sets down his wine glass.
>”I /was/ going to send Octavia; but I’m sure you’re aware of the fact that she’s been quite busy recently.
>You snicker at the thought of Octavia.
>For the last few weeks, you’ve instructed her to… oversee the evaluation of your Royal Guard.
>”So instead I’m going to send Fleur-de-Lis, and see how she handles it.
>Fleur-de-Lis?
“That’s a... peculiar choice…”
>He shrugs.
>”I’ve used her to the run occasional errands around Canterlot, so this is really just the next step.”
>You reply, a tinge of concern in your voice.
“Do you believe her to be… suitable?”
“After our brief time with her, and your use of her form, she is far from the civilized mare she once was.”
>You chuckle.
“It was only last month you informed us that she would nuzzle your loins as you slept; hoping to inhale your scent, and provoke your carnal desire..”

Tarnished Flowers, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Tarnished Flowers, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Tue 22 Dec 2015 01:54:33 No.25844204 Report

Quoted By: >>25844212

>>25844195
>He laughs.
>”You really do remember everything I say, don’t you?”
>You return his joyful gaze.
“We wish to know that you enjoy our gifts; and after her time with us, we are pleased to see you found her useful.
>He replies.
>"I appreciate getting your sloppy seconds Nightmare..."
>His words surprise you.
>/Sloppy?/
>Waiving your hoof dismissively, you reply.
"We assure you Brute, our little Flower was most reverent of her place before we released her to your care..."
"It was /you/ who perverted her mind and body, and transformed her into a common stable whorse."
>Anonymous rolls his eyes.
>"It's an expression Nightmare..."
>You snort, and lift your knife to cut another slice of roast.
"Your foalish humor are lost upon our ears..."
>Anonymous takes a moment, and consumes yet more flesh before replying.
>”I don’t know exactly what you did to her, but she’s been /more/ than eager to have some fun in the bed....”
>You take a small sip of wine.
"After being reminded of her family's estate, and of her proper place, she was quick to our heel."
“We have no doubt that, being aware of your rank and title, she lusted after your form.”
>You snort, suppressing a laugh.
"To think that she believed herself above serving as our hoof masseuse..."

Tarnished Flowers, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Tarnished Flowers, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Tue 22 Dec 2015 01:55:34 No.25844212 Report

Quoted By: >>25844221 >>25844235

>>25844204
>There is a low in the conversation as you and Anonymous both finish the last of your meal.
>With a quick note, and a puff of magic, two maid quickly arrive at the chamber entrance, and bow, before retrieving the tray before you.
>You can’t help but notice their clear fear and discomfort, even if they’re attempting to suppress it.
>Upon seeing the juices, and scraps of reddened meat their eyes l wet wide, and bounced back to and forth between yourself and Anonymous.
>Of course, displaying your fangs did little to calm their fears, and their eyes were forced closed as they placed the plates onto the cart.
>One of them even managed to clang a knife carelessly against your empty wine glass, nearly shattering it’s delicate form.
>…
>No doubt this misconduct must be discussed with Octavia.
>…
>After quickly placing coffee and a two small slices of chocolate cake onto the table, the maids once again bow, before quickly departing the room.
>Upon hearing the door close, you casually pour yourself a cup of coffee, while your Brute taste his cake.
”This… little Flower of yours… do you intend to have her replace our Octavia?”
>Removing the fork from his mouth, he chews, before swallowing as she shakes his head.
>”Of course not; Octavia is much more…
>He rubs his chin.
>”What’s the word…”
>”Calm?”
>”With Fleur, she’s always trying to get your attention, or just talking too much…”
>”Octavia on the other hand — she knows when to talk, and when to keep her mouth shut.”
>Taking a sip of your coffee, you smile, and nod.
“We’re pleased to see that Octavia is still your maid of choice…”
>He nods.
>”Of course she is; at this point, it's almost difficult to imagine this castle running without her..."
>You notice a pause.
>Perhaps as he things to himself.
>"But ever since Octavia's absence, Fleur seems to be /very/ eager to talk about her position.”
>That, catches your attention.

Tarnished Flowers, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Tarnished Flowers, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Tue 22 Dec 2015 01:57:03 No.25844221 Report

Quoted By: >>25844302

>>25844212
”Oh?"
"Please, do explain Brute.”
>Swallowing another bite of his cake, he replies.
>”Well, I was talking to Night Watch, who was telling me about the gossip between the castle staff.”
>”He said that Fleur seemed to have a pronounced ego - being the “personal assistant” of Lord Anonymous.
>This... Concerns you.
”Your Flower, she believes herself to hold a position of authority?”
>He nods.
>”Night Watch mentioned how she ordered him to get her lunch, since she was famished from serving “Her Lord.”
>…
>You another sip of your bitter drink.
>You’re hesitant to say it, but this news almost… angers you.
>Not two months ago she was at your hoof, proclaiming herself lower than the floor you stood upon.
>But now…
>She believes herself to be the favored servant of the Crown?
>If this is true…
”Have you yourself witnessed this behavior Brute?”
>He shakes his head.
>”Personally? No, I haven’t; although I don’t see why Night Watch would make a story like this up.”
>This, of course, is true.
>After the purging of disloyal, short-stay guards, your proper Night Guards have proven themselves to be a most dependable source of information.
“We wish for Night Watch to submit a formal report to us by morrow’s eve, before Fleur-de-Lis departs from the Palace.”
>Your Brute nods.
“This… servant… of yours shall learn that she is not above her peers, and certainly not the preferred maid of the Crown.”
>A snort leaves your nose.
“To think — she believes herself to be of equal rank and position to our Melody…”
>Your Brute holds up a finger.
>"Well... Actually, Night said that she claimed she was /replacing/ Octavia, and believed that she was fired for some sort of failure..."
>If you were not angered before, you most certainly are now.
>”Something to do with being a "lowly earth pony."

Tarnished Flowers, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Tarnished Flowers, Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Tue 22 Dec 2015 01:58:04 No.25844235 Report

Quoted By:

>>25844212
>Your blood nearly freezes.
>You try your best to remain calm; so as not to ruin this rare dinner celebration prepared by your Champion.
>Exhaling slowly, you reply.
"We wish for you to personally confirm such behavior Brute; this mustn't be tolerated."
"Coax her vanity; and if she has become ignorant of her rank, she shall be corrected most firmly."
>Your Brute replies.
>”Fair enough; I’ll be sure to keep an eye on her during her trip to Ponyville.”
>”If she acts up, or does something questionable, I’ll deal with her once she gets back.”
>You shake your head.
“Neigh Brute — if she truly believes her lowly position gives her special access to her Lord’s will, and rank among our ponies, /we/ shall correct her unruly behavior.”
>You notice Anonymous lean back, and smile.
>”I’m surprised this is so upsetting to you…”
>You nod.
”If your little Flower sees herself to be above our most loyal of servants, then she is delusional, and disrespectful.”
”We shall make her submit to, and humble herself before our maid…”
“She shall know to /fear/ her earthen Mistress, and once again understand her place within this Empire.”
>You notice your coffee, warm only moments ago, has now lost it’s steam.
>A thin lair of ice coats its surface.
”For Octavia is amongst the most loyal of our ponies -- Fleur is nothing more than a sullied, tarnished Flower.”

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Tue 22 Dec 2015 02:07:07 No.25844302 Report

Quoted By: >>25844979 >>25845612 >>25852737 >>25920439

>>25844221
Done.

As I'm sure a few people have already noticed, this a prelude to Hawkeye's "Mouth of Anonymous." I've always wondered how, if "Mouth of Anonymous" was canon, how Fleur would fit into the Castle's hierarchy, especially in comparison to Octavia.

Feedback, suggestions, comments, and reviews are all welcome. Forgive me Hawkeye, hopefully I didn't destroy your character or head-canon.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 22 Dec 2015 03:24:48 No.25844979 Report

Quoted By:

>>25844302
So, this was better than I had hoped. I always look forward to these AnoNMM scenes, as they seem to drop a good amount of character insight and world building. The discussion of castle hierarchy and Ocatvia's place in it was great. Bringing up Fleur and the Mouth of Anonymous story was welcome as well, as I'm a fan of that one.

Seeing what NMM thinks of Anon, and how she takes pleasure in the little things he does is tons of fun. These are always so good that I want more, but I don't want to be pushy about it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 22 Dec 2015 04:31:43 No.25845612 Report

Quoted By:

>>25844302
Liked it. Obviously no action, but nicely done dialog and some world/character building.

Also nice to see Octavia get a little recognition in whatever timeline this is.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO rarity holy fuck.png, 205KiB, 930x826

Anonymous Tue 22 Dec 2015 05:20:27 No.25846179 Report

Quoted By: >>25846540 >>25846679

Man, I'm two threads behind, and I've been two threads behind for weeks. I kind of dropped away from the thread for the past month and a bit.

It's a bit of a slog getting through some of the older stories that aren't that gripping, but I don't want to skip content.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 22 Dec 2015 05:45:01 No.25846540 Report

Quoted By: >>25846679

>>25846179
I haven't read anything since MrNameless left. I stop in occasionally to see if he came back.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 22 Dec 2015 05:54:11 No.25846679 Report

Quoted By: >>25850409

>>25846179
Yeah, was just there. Sucks once you get a thread.

>>25846540
Hardcore

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 22 Dec 2015 06:43:39 No.25847245 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 22 Dec 2015 07:57:24 No.25847964 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 8854__pinkie+pie_princess+luna_q (...).png, 863KiB, 1705x1065

Anonymous Tue 22 Dec 2015 12:28:12 No.25849376 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 22 Dec 2015 16:29:35 No.25850409 Report

Quoted By:

>>25846679
>Tardcore
FTFY

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 22 Dec 2015 16:29:36 No.25850410 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 22 Dec 2015 18:39:55 No.25851339 Report

Quoted By:

>>25757388

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 22 Dec 2015 19:37:45 No.25851806 Report

Quoted By: >>25852561

>rereading Nameless' stuff and Esc's stuff with an eye on AnonxNMM interaction bump

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 967323.png, 2MiB, 2500x2000

Anonymous Tue 22 Dec 2015 20:31:43 No.25852274 Report

Quoted By: >>25859365

>>25838744

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Tue 22 Dec 2015 21:07:35 No.25852561 Report

Quoted By:

Checking in. I'm not going to give responses for Tarnished Flowers yet, in case other people still have opinions.

>Pastebin Updates:
Almost - http://pastebin.com/5qCEqrRh
Tarnished Flowers - http://pastebin.com/my9D7fcp

>>25851806
>AnoNMM.
I don't have the exact lines for MrN, but I should be able to help with my AnoNMM content. From my Pastebin:
(http://pastebin.com/u/mendicant)

>More dialogue-centric, with both characters "on-screen."
(COMPLETE) Meet the Parents
(COMPLETE) Meet the Parents - Epilogue
(COMPLETE) Tarnished Flowers
(COMPLETE) To Protect an Empire (At the end, very brief AnoNMM.)

>Stories from either NMM or Anon's POV, thinking about the relationship, or it's dynamics.
(COMPLETE) 1000+1
(COMPLETE) Cookies and Milk
(COMPLETE) Coffee and Tea - (Cookies and Milk II)

>"Less canon" stories:
(COMPLETE) The Scent of Fear

>Stories I no longer considered "canon"
> (COMPLETE) Celestia's Foal

Hopefully that helps you out, since my pastebin is surprisingly full of stories, and it's easy to get lost in there.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 22 Dec 2015 21:31:12 No.25852737 Report

Quoted By: >>25854000

>>25844302
The bits between Anonymous and NMM were more interesting to me than the connection to Mouth, and within the latter the internal politics was more interesting than the direct connecting bits. I wonder if Nightmare realizes Fleur is only apeing her own views on race - possibly even saying things she doesn't entirely believe herself just because it will help her 'fit in' with the new regime? Nightmare strikes me as one who'd be blind to some of the implications of her own actions and doesn't quite realize she's sending terribly mixed messages to Fleur.

I'm also having a bit of fun trying to establish a bit of a timeline between all your stories, mostly based on how Nightmare thinks of Anonymous. For instance, I'd say this sits somewhere before CaT and 1000+1, but after most other of their interactions.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 22 Dec 2015 23:57:42 No.25854000 Report

Quoted By:

>>25852737
It seems like an good idea to make a timeline. As anyone tried this before with all the SiM stories?

Amm !!XCseBsZCpzB

Amm !!XCseBsZCpzB Wed 23 Dec 2015 00:27:24 No.25854264 Report

Quoted By: >>25854599

>>25825226
It doesn't do a lot for Proportional Punishment. The design is intended to solve problems that this particular quest doesn't have, so of course it'll be that way. There's no harm in having it archived in another spot though.

>Also I have no idea how this would handle cases where the author forgets to trip or similar (I'm guessing it doesn't).
If I notice it or someone informs me the missing posts it can be remedied.

I'm always open to ideas for improvement if anyone has any.

Olibird

Olibird Wed 23 Dec 2015 00:43:03 No.25854410 Report

Quoted By: >>25854420

>>25819346
>...If you weren’t a gambling man, you’d have dug yourself a grave and laid in it centuries ago.
>Still...those ears are DAMN sensitive.
>If you don’t do something, and soon, they’ll hear you breathing.
>”Yes, my niece. I was hoping we could coordinate a strategy for dealing with our captor. I have a plan, but it will require your cooperation.”
>Making sure your footfalls line up with Luna’s words, you creep away from the room, cupping both hands to your ear to keep their words sharp.
>You’d probably look ridiculous if there was anyone around TO see you.
>”O-oh,” Comes Cadance’s curt reply.
>”Has he struck you? Hurt you, or...touched you?”
>...Shit.
>You might be in trouble, here.
>Depending on how much of an imprint you’ve made on your guest.
>”I…No, auntie. He hasn’t done anything like that. He’s...actually been kinda nice...”
>You bite the inside of your cheek to keep from sighing in relief.
>Cadance’s smart enough to not bite the hand that feeds her.
>Or she’s so traumatized she doesn’t remember.
>Either way, you’re in the clear for now.
>”Good. I am glad to see the creature can be reasoned with. Now then, I have a plan to control him, and ensure that your and my sister’s stay will remain as painless as possible.”
>Luna pauses, obviously waiting for Cadance to respond.
>When no response is offered, Luna continues anyway.
>”As I have said before, he is much like I was, upon my return as Nightmare Moon. Full of anger and hate, with the objects of his hatred before him. Having been in that position, I know exactly how to manipulate him.”
>Luna’s chain rattles as she continues to speak. She must be pacing.
>”When I was in the throes of my madness, one of the few things that would have tempered my fury, would have been for the object of my ire to have...admitted fault.”

Olibird

Olibird Wed 23 Dec 2015 00:44:28 No.25854420 Report

Quoted By: >>25854442

>>25854410
>”To have her...them prostrated before me and accept that their crimes were greater than any punishment I could deal while begging justice. I will fulfill that role, and take the brunt of his rage. I am no stranger to pain, it is nothing I cannot handle.”
>“The important thing, my niece, is for you not to intervene. I am going to tell him many a disturbing tale, implicate my sister and I in horrendous things, perhaps even pretend I am descending once more into madness.”
>The rattling stops.
>“But I want you to know that nothing I say will be true. By the time Twilight comes to free us, he will be wrapped around my hoof, without having laid a claw on you or Celestia.”
>There’s a pause before Cadance finally speaks up, ”But it IS all true, isn’t it?”
>”Whaaat?! My dear niece surely you must-”
>”Don’t touch me!” Cadance screams out, her hooves clacking.
>You close your eyes, lamenting your inability to see what those two are doing.
>You’d kill for a mirror or a peephole, right now.
>A metallic clanging rings out from Celestia’s room-that shout was loud enough for her to hear.
>You inch back towards the two speaking alicorns, crouching down to keep listening over the noise from your third prisoner.
>”Cadance...surely you don’t think I could be turned once again, do you? I created a failsafe, the Tantabus, to ensure I COULD never even THINK of-”
>”I don’t care if you turn back into Nightmare Moon or not! You’re just as horrible as Luna! I-I saw…”
>She trails off, her voice quivering, “I saw a gryphon get eaten alive today. And then it..it crawled away! It was still alive!”
>Cadance breaks down sobbing, her cries echoing throughout the cave.
>You can barely make out Luna’s response,
>”What has he done to you…?”
>”He saved me from the things YOU put here! Twice!” Cadance sobs out, her tears flowing freely.

Olibird

Olibird Wed 23 Dec 2015 00:46:31 No.25854442 Report

Quoted By: >>25854454

>>25854420
>When Luna speaks, her voice is downright frigid. “He put you in harm's way? Cadance, I forbid you from leaving this cave again. I will not allow whatever threats he has made to come to pass.”
>”He didn’t-” she hiccups, “make any threats! He wanted help finding you and a-aunt Celestia something to eat!”
>”...Cadance,” Luna’s voice has warmed, but there’s still a bit of frost clinging to her words,
>“I have gone a thousand years without eating. A few days will be nothing to me...and it may do my sister some good, to remember what it is to want. You did not need to do that.”
>”...Why, auntie? Why did you send so many things to this place? What did they all do to deserve this?”
>Your breath catches in your throat.
>This is it.
>The question to the greatest mystery of Tartarus.
>”...Truthfully Cadance, I do not remember. You would have to ask Celestia.”
>She’s lying.
>There’s no way both Celestia AND Luna managed to conveniently forget something that huge.
>Does she know you’re here?
>”Much of what I once was, many of my old memories were locked away when the Elements sealed Nightmare Moon. I can only vaguely recall my sister saying that it would be a mercy.”
>Cadance voices almost the exact words that spring to your mind.
>”Mercy?! Auntie this isn’t mercy! It’s torture! This place is...is worse than anything anypony imagined!”
>”He is showing you the worst of it! To steal your heart from us!”
>”There shouldn’t BE a worst of it!” Cadance is sobbing again. “The o-only difference between you and Sombra is that he didn’t hide what he’s done, isn’t it?”
>”Cadance...please…”
>Your guest continues to sob wordlessly.
>The quiet clinking of Luna’s chain is all you need, to know that she’s trying to comfort Cadance.
>Dammit all, YOU should be the one she’s taking comfort in, not her aunt.
>You’ve only just planted the seed of doubt in her, you haven’t had time to tend to it yet.

Olibird

Olibird Wed 23 Dec 2015 00:48:06 No.25854454 Report

Quoted By: >>25856942 >>25881684

>>25854442
>Any concern you had regarding Luna disrupting your bond with your guest is soon brushed aside.
>”I said don’t touch me!” Cadance roars, the only warning before a slap rings out.
>...She didn’t just do what you think she did, did she?
>Even Celestia stops her clanging.
>If it wasn’t deathly silent, you’d have missed Luna’s next words, barely above a whisper,
>”...He’s poisoned your mind…”
>”He saved! My life! From the place YOU made! You said before that the proof you aren’t Nightmare Moon is because you aren’t wearing a helmet and your fur isn’t black! That’s the only difference, isn’t it?”
>”I see he is moving faster than I had expected,” Frost once more spills forth from Luna’s mouth, “Leave. I need to reevaluate my strategem. But I expect to see you here tomorrow night.”
>The echoing clip clop, accompanied by a loud snivel, alerts you that Cadance is doing as she’s told.
>You stand up and nonchalantly lean against the wall.
>That should be enough to let her know you were listening, without destroying what little dignity you have.
>Cadance is staring at the ground as she turns the corner, her eyes as red as they were back when she had seen the gryphon, a few hours ago.
>She stops with a jerk and looks up at you, “M-master?”
>...Whelp. If Luna didn’t know you were listening before, she sure does now.

Olibird

Olibird Wed 23 Dec 2015 01:00:37 No.25854599 Report

Quoted By: >>25855064 >>25855774 >>25856305 >>25857264 >>25857610 >>25857957 >>25858335 >>25862106 >>25863650 >>25871148

>>25819558
>>25819634
>>25819663
>>25819727
>>25820330
>>25820356
>>25824472
You know what? I'm going to be a gigantic faggot and say that all you guys are amazing. You've turned this story into something much, much larger than I ever thought it could be, and faster than I ever thought I could write. So...I'm going to say thanks, for the interest and the input so far.

>>25854264
I couldn't have picked a better picture for Punishment myself. I don't know how prestigious the CYOA archive is, but...either way, I'm honored you thought it was good enough to be in it, so thanks for adding my weirdo story to it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 01:47:09 No.25855064 Report

Quoted By:

>>25854599

Started reading a few hours ago.
Finished just now.

Man.
You do some shit.

Out of the many i've met, t's the very first Cyoa i've read like a story, non-obtrusive and all.

That's really something. Please keep it up.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 02:53:51 No.25855774 Report

Quoted By: >>25856305 >>25858540 >>25862106

>>25854599
I've been around since the first post and its so rewarding to see your story.
I love you too Olibird

Now my fellow faggots.

Wut do?

Its time to be proactive, but now we have Celestia and Luna both dead set against us. Celestia does not know Luna is pretending we can still use this.

But Luna....oooooh luna.

First, the only honest individual we have met since our brothers, is crying. Kneel down in front of her, look in her eyes, and ask if we can hug her.

"Thank you."

Cause honestly....I mean she's not blinding herself. Luna and Celestia both, completely see themselves as in the right. It'd be saddening if it weren't so disgusting. How do we show them?

To them if we took them out to tartarus they'd probably see nothing more than criminals hurting criminals, rather than the true horror it actually is.

If we super want to fuck with Luna, we should motion Cadance to follow with a fingertip to our lips to signal silence. Let Luna grow frantic while we converse and comfort Cadance in a hug. Still no sex guys, seriously bad idea.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 03:45:16 No.25856305 Report

Quoted By: >>25856611 >>25860271 >>25867889

>>25854599
>I'm going to be a gigantic faggot and say that all you guys are amazing.
You are a gigantic faggot. But you're awesome, too. I enjoy reading and contributing to your story.

>>25855774
I agree, Cadence is our move. I'm sad to see that Luna is going the way she's going, but it'll be fun to work against her.

As for Cadence, I say escort her back to her room and ask her if she'd rather be alone or if she'd like to talk. Respect her decision either way, and then call it a night. The following morning let her know how much it meant to us that she understands how horrible this place has been to us, then share the pear with her. She understands how precious food is, so she'll understand how important a gesture that is.

At the end of the game, our play is to not play Cadence and just be open about how hard the experience is in Tartarus and how much we appreciate having someone we can work with and lean on. Temper that with a joke about how she's got a lot to learn, though.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 04:10:29 No.25856611 Report

Quoted By: >>25860271

>>25856305
>share the pear with her. She understands how precious food is, so she'll understand how important a gesture that is.
This is perfect.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 04:40:18 No.25856942 Report

Quoted By: >>25857610 >>25857627

>>25854454
Olibird, are you gonna finish Safeword later? or are you done with it?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 05:06:32 No.25857264 Report

Quoted By:

>>25854599
Damn. And my suggestion was going to be do nothing, let Luna try to play her game... oh well, I guess that was too much to hope for.

Anyhow, we need to do something about cutting off communication between Celestia and Luna. Celestia's still unaware of what transpired, but Luna could still try and communicate with her (despite the punishment she knows we'll inflict on her). The more we can keep them isolated, the better.

Some of the other suggestions here regarding Cadance are good, though.

Lastly, there's one other thing we need to consider: Earlier on, Cadance said Luna told her:
>"...‘not without magic, Cadance.’ I think she was talking about turning back intto Nightmare Moon?”
But, now Luna told Cadance that:
>" I am going to tell him many a disturbing tale, implicate my sister and I in horrendous things, perhaps even pretend I am descending once more into madness."
The 'relapse' into NMM was going to be a cover for her.

So then, my question is, which one is accurate? What else might Luna be planning - was she merely telling Cadance not to try and intervene until she could put her wider plan to get inside our head into action? 'Don't try to fight him without magic, I have another plan', etc?

Caffeine 40k

Caffeine 40k Wed 23 Dec 2015 05:42:45 No.25857610 Report

Quoted By:

>>25856942
I think since he is on a roll with PropPun, he will go as far as he can with this one first before moving on to Safeword.
>>25854599
We should be the ones thanking you.

Olibird

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Olibird Wed 23 Dec 2015 05:44:43 No.25857627 Report

Quoted By: >>25857764 >>25857870

>>25856942
Safeword has one last update in store. I honestly had planned for Punishment to be a short diversion so I could finish it right...Obviously, that's not what happened. I promise, though, it's coming, and hopefully on New Years. Maybe.

Caffeine 40k

Caffeine 40k Wed 23 Dec 2015 06:00:43 No.25857764 Report

Quoted By:

>>25857627
Now it is a insatiable monster out of your control.

We shall have more.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 06:10:46 No.25857870 Report

Quoted By:

>>25857627
That's a common thing with CYOAs. Urban Survival was meant to be short. 5 month, 1089 posts, and 281,433 words later...

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 06:18:27 No.25857957 Report

Quoted By:

>>25854599
You're really nailing the CYOA aspect of this... stopping at appropriate points, letting us give direction while still driving the story and building the world.

The whole world and concept is also really compelling.

As to what to do, I kinda see two main directions:

- continue playing a house of cards-esq game of manipulation and lies upon lies, which could be fun.

- jam the breaks on, directly confront, let Luna know you're not buying it and punish accordingly... which could also be fun.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 07:04:49 No.25858335 Report

Quoted By: >>25858463 >>25860271 >>25867889

>>25854599
Offer Cadance a hug, offer her half your food, and let her share room with you. Be nice, be honest, be friendly. She's the only one that's to trying to play us so i think that we can open up to her. It will feel good to let some of that anger and hatred that's boiling inside of us out. And I don't mean in a violent way. Tell her stories of what happened to us, and how it felt. She will understand and have compassion for us, and fear us less if she understands who we are. It will get her on our side.

Yes she will most likely retell that information to Luna, yes, but when Cadance sees Luna exploiting the information we entrusted her with. It will make Cadance feel bad about herself and consider that Luna be a dick. We are her only possible friend down here now and she is ours. Let's built on that, while not letting her forget she are also her master.

As for Luna... Fuck her... metaphorically. She is playing a game and she might very well be better at this than we are. She was in the same situation as we were and she might understand us better than we understand ourselves. Tirek was the master planner, not us. I honestly don't think there is a way for us to turn Luna on our side without breaking her, and that would destroy our budding relationship with Cadance.

That said, we hold the power here, and the only reason Luna can play a game is because we let her. So let's stop that. Gag her, and isolate her. Whatever plans she has, she won't be able to outsmart us if she can't do anything at all. Don't punish her, don't talk to her, don't let Cadance talk to her. We will return to her sooner or later, but for now, the best thing we can do is put her out of the game until the situation if firmly under our control.

(cont.)

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 07:22:44 No.25858463 Report

Quoted By: >>25858583 >>25867889

>>25858335
Instead and playing with Luna, we can play with Celestia. as unlikely at it looked on the first glance, I think she is the easier one to deal with right now. She is angry and not much else right now. That anger blinds her and whatever machinations she would come up with otherwise will be null.

Actually, why don't we let Cadance be there while we do this? Cadance has seen this place, and after we explain to her how we feel, she should be sufficiently on our side to understand our anger. Bring Cadance with us, ungag Celestia and ash her why did she create Tartarus, and why did she banish us and so many others so cruelly. She is self righteous and truly believes what she says, but we are in the right here, and should be able to hold our moral high ground. We killed three ponies, yes, a fair punishment would be spending three lifetimes in this hell. But how many more have we been here for? five? ten? more? Those were taken unjustly from us. and she deserves to be punished for them. Five lifetimes... how many years is that for alicorns? How many is that times ten thousand... once for every creature that she sent here, that has already served their due? She is the biggest monster here, not us. No matter if it's true or not, it's a position we can defend.

IF Celestia does not accpet our point, Cadance will see and undestand our anger and understand why we yearn to hurt her aunts. If Celestia admits her fault, however unlikely that is, she will basically give us a free pass on punishing her, effectively silencing any protests Cadance might have had. Yes Cadance might want us to be merciful and forgiving, and we might get to it eventually... but instead of trying to fight us, she will be trying to temper our rage. Even while opposing us, she will still be on our side.

(cont.)

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 07:33:23 No.25858540 Report

Quoted By:

>>25855774
>If we super want to fuck with Luna, we should motion Cadance to follow with a fingertip to our lips to signal silence. Let Luna grow frantic while we converse and comfort Cadance in a hug.

Cadance just disappears around the corner without any more sound. I love it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 07:37:47 No.25858583 Report

Quoted By: >>25860255 >>25867889

>>25858463
Also, I've been thinking how to get some Lewd going. Not that this story needs it... but seriously, we have three pony princesses and I'll be damned if we don't get our dick wet in some of them.

Right now, the two options we have with Cadance is either raping her, or stressing out how lonely we are and getting some pity sex out of her... neither of which I'm hungry for.

With Luna, if we don't let her play her games in other ways, she might be willing to step down so low as to use sex as a way to manipulate us. I think that hate sex, combined with the look of self-disgust and regular-disgust in Luna's eyes while we fuck her, would satisfy our urges excellently.

Celestia... Instead of just devising new ways to torture and punish her, we could also be thinking of ways she could make up to us for what she did. One of which could be sex. Though some good old rape as a way of asserting dominance would work for me as well in this case.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 09:39:43 No.25859365 Report

Quoted By: >>25864678

>>25852274

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 12:44:46 No.25860068 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 14:13:18 No.25860255 Report

Quoted By: >>25860357 >>25860399 >>25864865

>>25858583
Actually. Oh dear god guys. We've been given the key.

> Celestia could stand to learn what it is to want.

Do not feed her as punishment. If there is any sweets in the plane, find it whether it be fruit or whatever and use it against her.

As for Luna, quite simply let's sleep deprive her. Every time she goes to her dreams she can conjure up comfort from the dreamscape maybe even escape and plot with her guard or other dreamwalkers.

She is the nightmare. Mare of dreams. Let's take that from her.

Let's also blindfold celestia.

Take dreams from the mistress of sleep, and sight and food from the goddess of light.

Meanwhile, none of this is so bad that it will alienate cadance. And we can explain their punishment is linked that is why we are not feeding celestia

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 14:19:56 No.25860271 Report

Quoted By:

>>25858335
>>25856611
>>25856305
I like these options

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 14:46:53 No.25860357 Report

Quoted By: >>25860368

>>25860255

I like what these dubs say. Maybe minus blindfolding Celetia, that's not really necessary right now, as neither you nor Cadance visits her.

How about putting some food in her sight, but out of her reach instead?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 14:49:37 No.25860368 Report

Quoted By:

>>25860357

Forgot to add.

Guys. I vote for tha sleep deprivation also dur to the fact that Luna can contact the other Princesses in her sleep.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 14:56:59 No.25860399 Report

Quoted By:

>>25860255
>she can conjure up comfort from the dreamscape

Hang on a minute...

>I created a failsafe, the Tantabus

This is the S4 finale, so she's still dealing with this thing. What if being awake IS her comfort from the Tantabus? It could explain why she's not afraid of us. Do you guys think we could exploit it somehow?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 16:37:23 No.25860862 Report

Quoted By: >>25860891

OK, i have an idea, but I've never wrote a story in English before.
So who would be interested in a story about anon being able to mind-control pony?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 16:42:37 No.25860891 Report

Quoted By: >>25860913

>>25860862
That's very broad description, could you be a bit more specific?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 16:46:22 No.25860913 Report

Quoted By: >>25860952 >>25974956

>>25860891
i don't have a clear idea so far, i haven't slept in a long time and my brain is currently running on E-Drink and coffee.
My idea so far is that Anon got those power either by founding some kind of magical item or by winning a bet against Discord.
And he use is new found ability by having a little "fun" with the mare of ponyville.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 16:54:01 No.25860952 Report

Quoted By: >>25860968

>>25860913
Yeah, I would be interested in that. As long as you don't make it a complete power fantasy with Anon being able to to use his new found powers on anyone and anything with no consequence, a story like this could be a great read.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 16:58:27 No.25860968 Report

Quoted By: >>25974956

>>25860952
I already tough about some limitation he's going to have. I'll start writing tonight after work. Except my around midnight.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 20:40:54 No.25861849 Report

Quoted By:

Up from 10.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 20:41:06 No.25861852 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 21:15:28 No.25862106 Report

Quoted By: >>25863569 >>25867889

>>25854599
>>25855774
We need to double down on Cadence. Make her our ally by sharing food, as other Anons have mentioned, and having her help us hunt and scavenge. When we're out of the cave, as much as is possible, safety first, we need to show her the various atrocities in Tartarus to help push her farther away from the Sisters and toward us.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 22:59:42 No.25863034 Report

Quoted By:

Up again.

Caffeine 40k

Caffeine 40k Wed 23 Dec 2015 23:52:28 No.25863569 Report

Quoted By: >>25866228 >>25867889

>>25862106
We should make her our friend.

Admit to everything, and apologize for trying to use her against the princesses because it has been a long time since we trusted anyone.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2015 23:58:06 No.25863650 Report

Quoted By:

>>25854599
I love dis. All of dis. World building and all.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 01:24:40 No.25864678 Report

Quoted By: >>25894442

>>25859365

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 01:40:58 No.25864865 Report

Quoted By: >>25865190

>>25860255
Sleep depriving Luna is near impossible. We'd need to be awake the same amount of time.

Caffeine 40k

Caffeine 40k Thu 24 Dec 2015 02:10:57 No.25865190 Report

Quoted By: >>25866110 >>25866228 >>25867093 >>25867889 >>25974956

>>25864865
Chinese Water drop torture?

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 03:29:18 No.25866067 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 03:33:10 No.25866110 Report

Quoted By:

>>25865190
Anon has trouble coming up with materials to build and maintain a net, and you want him to build a torture apparatus?

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 03:44:51 No.25866228 Report

Quoted By: >>25866833

>>25863569
>We should make her our friend.
Yes.

>Admit to everything
Fuck no. This is a horrible idea.

>>25865190
This is a similarly terrible idea.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 04:37:02 No.25866833 Report

Quoted By: >>25866846 >>25867084 >>25974956

>>25866228
Admitting to everything is indeed a bad idea.

However. The chinese water torture might work with an alteration. If we have a spot where water drips down near the stream we can restrain her there perhaps? I really think we need to sleep deprive Luna. Food water deprivation, pain. She's been through it all, but she's never been deprived of her dreams.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 04:38:31 No.25866846 Report

Quoted By: >>25867084

>>25866833
maybe switch out Luna and Celestia? The flight response with something dangling from the bars such that is caresses against her every now and again?

Startling her and allowing her response to rouse her.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 04:57:40 No.25867084 Report

Quoted By: >>25867285 >>25867301 >>25867523 >>25868878

>>25866833
>>25866846
Neither of these really speak to the characters you're trying to break, though.

Luna turned into NMM because she wasn't loved. Or something to that effect. So, lean on that old wound. Move Luna somewhere where she can see Anon and Cadence interacting, but ignore everything she says. Treat her like a piece of scenery.

For Celestia, allow Cadence to visit her from time to time and let Celestia see how much closer Cadence is to Anon than her. Set the scenario where Cadence is the one to condemn Celestia on Anons behalf.

Physical torture isn't going to be shit for either Cel or Luna. Though Luna's suggestion that privation might have an impact on Cel is probably spot on.

If you torture them, though, and use pain and violence to get revenger not only will you likely lose ground with Cadence, who is the biggest advantage in this situation, but you'll also be wasting time. Celestia and Luna need to be outplayed, not teased like dogs on a leash.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 04:58:49 No.25867093 Report

Quoted By:

>>25865190
Why do you namefag if you produce no content? That's just trash.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 05:13:18 No.25867285 Report

Quoted By: >>25867523

>>25867084
Absolutely this. We have neither the means nor the power to physically torture them. If we break them, it will be by getting inside their heads.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 05:14:43 No.25867301 Report

Quoted By:

>>25867084
On that note, if we do punish Luna for this transgression, we shouldn't inflict her punishment on her. She wants that - for us to inflict pain on her because she can take it. Instead, much like we did with Celestia for breaking our net, we should inflict the punishment on the other.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 05:32:36 No.25867523 Report

Quoted By: >>25867889

>>25867084
>>25867285
Finally, anons that get it. Trash-tier edge torture porn won't work. We need to leverage their centuries of baggage against them.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 05:33:23 No.25867530 Report

Quoted By: >>25867595 >>25867889

I'm completely going against the hive mind on this one, but we've admitted we arn't the con man, and playing mind games is probably not our strength.

A little manipulation and careful calculating makes sense, but I'd love to see a more direct Anon and a less chess grandmaster style anon.

Punish the sisters directly and openly while letting Cadence come to her own conclusion about the horrors of this place and the ethical implications of being sent there. Maybe reel in the punishment enough not to overly shock Cadence.

I'd even go so far as to not come across as too welcoming to Cadence. Play "hard to get" so to speak. Let her come to us for comfort rather than us trying to compel it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 05:39:37 No.25867595 Report

Quoted By: >>25867889

>>25867530
(cont)

As to what to actually do with the sisters, I agree that going all slasher on them is probably not the way to go, but it seems a shame to have this interesting world with cool mechanics like not being able to actually die and just play head games, and it's been awhile since we've had some good-ol-fashioned physical stuff.

I mean I like the elaborate mental fuckery as much as everyone, but sometimes it's nice to see some proper bondage.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 05:59:50 No.25867816 Report

Quoted By: >>25867845

What are some stories that contain slut training?

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 06:01:53 No.25867845 Report

Quoted By: >>25870696

>>25867816
Ask the bimbo thread.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 06:04:52 No.25867889 Report

Quoted By: >>25868036

>>25856305
>>25858335
>>25858463
>>25862106
>>25867523
Yes to these.

>>25867530
>>25867595
>>25865190
>>25863569
>>25858583
No to these

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 06:16:48 No.25868036 Report

Quoted By: >>25870043

>>25867889
While I agree with it on a logical level, if feels like most stories here turn into these deep multi-level games of strategy and manipulation with lies building on other lies... would be nice to see something different is all.

The plan doesn't have to be this complicated and perilous. Tartarus is real and horrifying, the princesses really did send us here, and for once we've arguably got the moral high ground.. there's no need for a complex web of lies and deceit.

I'd say hold off on punishing Celestia and Luna, for awhile at least. Maybe come up with something token to show our resolve to do it but that we know won't be effective and won't be too unreasonable to Cadence. Mean time, let Cadence experience more of the horrors of Tartarus.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO What the fuck I don't even anymo (...).png, 1MiB, 2718x1278

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 07:16:27 No.25868568 Report

Quoted By: >>25868887 >>25869774

>>25757388
Hey faggots, not sure if I'll be back for real or not as my IP has been falsely permabanned for something I didn't do, but I updated the archive links in the wiki page.

Some Anon will need to take on the job of keeping them updated.

Good to see you fags still alive and kicking after almost 2 years!

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 07:55:00 No.25868878 Report

Quoted By: >>25870043 >>25870449 >>25975765

>>25867084
This is horrible idea..

Luna is playing us and you want to let her watch what we do with Cadance? Seriously? The more she knows the easier it is for her to play her games and turn Cadance against us. And how exactly are you going to stop Cadance from interacting with her?

Trying to get Cadance to condemn Celestia is not a bad idea, but making her intentionally jealous is only going to strengthen her resolve against us, and we shouldn't be using Cadance so dieectly, or we're risking her realizing that we're using her and hating us for it. Sleep deprivation won't work either because it requires us to be awake too.

And contrary to what you said, Physical torture might be the only form of torture that Cadance would accept us using. Why? Because she saw that gryphon so she knows that it's something that Celestia and Luna did to others, and therefore could be considered proportional punishment.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 07:55:51 No.25868887 Report

Quoted By:

>>25868568
Had that happen to me once. Was weird. I just kept typing the story up and posting with my phone when the next parts were posted in the pastebin.

If you do that, I'm sure some kindly anon would be willing to post your new content for you.

That's assuming you are a writefag of course.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 10:44:00 No.25869774 Report

Quoted By:

>>25868568
hopefully that can be fixed

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 11:50:01 No.25870043 Report

Quoted By: >>25870449

>>25868036
>>25868878
That's an interesting idea. I would actually ask Cadance as time goes on. See if we can't get her involved by asking, as our guest, you can't stop that I'm going to punish them, but I will let you have a say in how.

The iron is hot and we need to strike.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 13:46:58 No.25870449 Report

Quoted By: >>25974956

>>25870043
>See if we can't get her involved by asking, as our guest, you can't stop that I'm going to punish them, but I will let you have a say in how.
I can see that working, in time, if it's framed right. But honestly I think its better to build on our successes with Cadence first. Make a point of gathering more often than necessary to show just how much of a struggle life in Tartarus is, and casually expose her to more and more of the terrible things in Tartarus and, by extension, the horrible things C and L have put the inmates through.

>>25868878
>muh edge
>muh torture
Keep trying, kiddo.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 15:21:06 No.25870696 Report

Quoted By: >>25870715

>>25867845
All the stories in the bimbo thread skip the whole "training" part and every character goes straight to the "cockslut" part. There should be some stories with some more "physical" or "mental" training.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 15:28:55 No.25870715 Report

Quoted By:

>>25870696
Aside from the main story in the op, you may like Rarity's Debt. It does, however, have some foalcon elements:
http://pastebin.com/HXtRQpUs

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 17:03:10 No.25871148 Report

Quoted By: >>25872124 >>25881750 >>25974956

>>25854599
I like this anon. I like that he's smart and this isn't some stupid rapetrain story. I'd like to see him continue to be sly about things.

Any idea on when or if we'll hear more about what Tirek and Discord are doing topside? If I were anon I'd be irritated if I wasn't getting at least semi-regular updates.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 19:06:53 No.25872008 Report

Quoted By: >>25874890

Emergency nog and bourbon filled bump

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 19:18:52 No.25872124 Report

Quoted By:

>>25871148
It's been years since both of them disappeared and neither of them contacted us once before dropping the princesses in front of us.They either can't contact us or they don't care enough to do so.

If I was anon I'd be irritated too, but he can't really do anything about it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 20:47:19 No.25872913 Report

Quoted By: >>25873668

Merry Christmas you fucking autistic faggots.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 22:16:41 No.25873668 Report

Quoted By: >>25873763 >>25879351

>>25872913
Love you too, you raging cunt.

What does NMM do for Hearth's Warming?

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 24 Dec 2015 22:27:04 No.25873763 Report

Quoted By: >>25879351

>>25873668
Something adorable. Probably dropping her guard for once, and inviting Anon, Octavia, and Melancholy into the Royal Chambers, and having a simple, but warm harth's warning.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 25 Dec 2015 00:25:04 No.25874890 Report

Quoted By:

>>25872008
still drinkan

Anonymous

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Anonymous Fri 25 Dec 2015 01:40:29 No.25875565 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

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Anonymous Fri 25 Dec 2015 03:01:59 No.25876313 Report

Quoted By:

>seriously awesome that we're still alive and kicking
Happy Christmas Everyone!

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 25 Dec 2015 04:36:17 No.25877185 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 25 Dec 2015 05:50:21 No.25877852 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 25 Dec 2015 08:44:58 No.25879274 Report

Quoted By:

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Fri 25 Dec 2015 08:57:13 No.25879351 Report

Quoted By: >>25880081

>Checking In
Well, after >>25873668 I tried to do >>25873763, but I simply don't have the time, so unfortunately, no holiday green from me. Have a Merry Christmas everyone.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 25 Dec 2015 11:57:01 No.25880081 Report

Quoted By:

>>25879351
>Have a Merry Christmas everyone.
Back acha, you glorious horsefucker.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO darling__I_have_no_idea_why_you_ (...).png, 1MiB, 1000x665

Anonymous Fri 25 Dec 2015 15:44:55 No.25880923 Report

Quoted By:

Merry Christmas fuckers

Olibird

Olibird Fri 25 Dec 2015 17:54:13 No.25881684 Report

Quoted By: >>25881692

>>25854454
>Holding a finger up to your lips, you shush your guest, just in time for Luna to speak up,
>”Cadance? Cadance, come back here at once!”
>Letting your finger slip from your lips, you use it to beckon her to follow you, a direct contradiction to Luna’s demand.
>If Luna’s been messing with you this whole time, then it's your turn to start messing with her.
>For a moment, it seems as though your guest is going to obey her aunt over you.
>She stares at you, her brow furrowing...but she doesn’t make any move to return to the lunar princess.
>...Oh! Of course.
>She’s probably seen maybe two sets of fingers in her life, she might have no idea what you’re saying.
>Let’s see...what would be the best way to get the message across?
>Pointing would probably be a bit too authoritarian right now, and dragging her is completely out of the question…
>An old memory resurfaces, from the last time you were around beings that didn’t have anything resembling a hand.
>Balling your hands to mimic hooves, you pantomime the changeling motion for ‘come hither.’
>Recognition sparks in Cadance’s eyes, barely noticeable behind the murky cloud of her trauma.
>Lifting a hoof, she starts clip-clopping...over to you.
>You bite down on your lip to keep from breaking out in a manic grin.
>”Cadance?! Are you alright?!”
>Luna’s chain rattles behind you as she works herself up in a panic.
>With a quick glance, you confirm that, while she looks quite pained to do so, Cadance is still following you as you lead her away from her aunts.
>Luna wants to keep playing games with you?
>Fine.
>That’s check, moon horse. Your move.
>You know you need to cut off any way for Luna to communicate...but until you can figure out exactly how she summoned Cadance, anything you do could be a waste.
>And you hate being wasteful.
>Once you reach the turnoff to Cadance’s room, you stop and turn around, kneeling down before your guest to be eye level with her.

Olibird

Olibird Fri 25 Dec 2015 17:55:22 No.25881692 Report

Quoted By: >>25881703

>>25881684
>As you stare into her red, puffy eyes, your grin breaks free from its restraints.
“Thank you, Cadance.”
>She takes a jerking, unsteady step backwards, her wings flaring out in surprise, “W-wha..?” “Thank you so much for understanding. For seeing this place for what it is.”
>You’d continue, but you can see your words are barely registering.
>But, her wings slowly lower, settling back in against her barrel as she mumbles out, “You’re welcome, master.”
>Silence settles in between the two of you.>Cadance stands right before you, mentally as far away as she can be.
>You know that’s not healthy.
“Hey You going to be alright tonight?”
>She blinks, snapping back to the present, “I...I don’t know. Can I stay in aunt Celestia’s room, tonight? I’m not used to being alone anymore…”
“You miss your husband.”
>She nods wordlessly as her eyes start to well up with tears once again.
“I’d...really rather you didn’t, right now. But...you shouldn’t be alone, in a place like this. I’m the only one with a blanket, so why don’t you stay with me, tonight?”
>Plus you don’t think she’ll be in any condition to try to dismember you in your sleep, after all that.
>It takes her a moment to respond, “I...I don’t know…”
“Who would you rather have protect you, the one stuck in a cage, or the one who’s already kept you safe twice today?”
>”You’re not going to...try anything, right?” She looks away the instant the words leave her mouth, obviously ashamed she even asked.
>What’s with these mares and constantly insinuating you’re going to rape her?
>You make a show of it as you paint an overly shocked look on your face.
“Cadance, you’re married!”
>”Alright...I’ll...stay with you, tonight.”
>You flash her another smile before standing up.
“Go make yourself comfortable, while I go get your mat.”

Olibird

Olibird Fri 25 Dec 2015 17:56:45 No.25881703 Report

Quoted By: >>25881712 >>25883190

>>25881692
>When you finally enter your room, rolled up makeshift mattress in hand, you find Cadance curled up in a ball under the bear-like pelt you use as a blanket.
“Oh no, that won’t do at all.”
>”M-master?” Cadance jerks out of whatever stupor she had fallen under to look up at you.
>Laying her mat down next to her, you jerk your head to the side,
“Come on, get up.”
>Shakily, she climbs to her hooves, slipping out from under the blanket.
>You push the two mats together, as they had been previously, before flipping the blanket over and laying it down on the bed.
“If we’re going to do this, we’re going to do this right. Lay down in the middle, would you? On your back.”
>She blinks before obeying, your little scheme being lost on her as she lays down on her back, her forelegs curling up above her barrel in a rather adorable manner.
>You get to work, folding the blanket just so, one side securing the other, until Cadance is cocooned in the hide, with only her face poking out.
>A long forgotten word resurfaces in your mind.
>She’s wrapped up like a burrito.
>Well, it’s comfort for her, and if she has any nightmares, she won’t be able to do much more than squirm with that blanket restraining her.
>You also won’t have to worry about her trying to slip away and see Celestia, while you’re asleep.
“There we go, isn’t that better?”
>As you lay down, you can’t help but notice her cheeks seem a bit redder...is she blushing under her fur?
>”It is. Very much so...thank you master.”
>You gently turn her to face away, before wrapping your arms around her and pressing to her bound form, becoming the big spoon.
“I hope you don’t mind...it’s kinda chilly without a blanket. Or fur.”
>”N-no, it’s alright.”
>With a smile, you rest your face against the back of the blanket covering her head, using her has a pillow.
“Good night, Cadance.”

Olibird

Olibird Fri 25 Dec 2015 17:57:57 No.25881712 Report

Quoted By: >>25882335 >>25883190 >>25920921 >>25942879

>>25881703
>”Good night, master,” She repeats before the two of you slowly drift off to sleep.
>...
>The only break from your eternal sentence ends prematurely.
>While you aren’t sure how long you get to sleep, your guest wakes you as she squirms, mumbling in her sleep.
>Her limbs jerk against the burrito blanket as she lets out little half voiced cries, calling out for her husband and “Twilight”-the name of the fourth alicorn, if you guessed right.
>She’d be thrashing around if she could.
>Apparently restraining her was the right idea.
>You shush her and stroke your hand over her face, petting her as you try to calm her down.
“It’s alright Cadance, you’re safe here. I’m not going to let anything hurt you…”
>It takes a while, but she does calm down, your repeated comfort eventually getting through to her.
>With her quiet against you, you once more close your eyes and fall asleep.
>Unfortunately, her terrors return throughout the night, twice more dragging you back from whatever dreams you may be having to comfort your guest.
>You can’t help but get annoyed.
>It’s not like she was ACTUALLY eaten or anything!
“Shhh-shhh-sh Cadance. I got you…”
>You aren’t going to get a goods nights sleep while you have these three, are you?
>The third time seems to be the charm, as this time, she manages to stay asleep allowing you to dream of running away from giant bird monsters uninterrupted.
>At least this time you feel somewhat rested when you’re jolted awake by a loud crack, like thunder striking right next to you.
>”Aaahh!!” Your guest cries out, thrashing helplessly against her blanket.
>”Wakey wakey, Anon!” Discords voice slithers into your ears.

Olibird

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Olibird Fri 25 Dec 2015 18:02:40 No.25881750 Report

Quoted By: >>25881828 >>25882049

Merry Christmas, SiM.

>>25871148
I swear, I had this planned before you posted that.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO nicknod.gif, 682KiB, 320x240

Anonymous Fri 25 Dec 2015 18:16:05 No.25881828 Report

Quoted By:

>>25881750
I'm in yo head, nigga. I'm in yo head.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 25 Dec 2015 18:42:22 No.25882049 Report

Quoted By:

>>25881750
Things gonna get interesting.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 25 Dec 2015 19:14:33 No.25882335 Report

Quoted By: >>25882409

>>25881712
>Discord
Hit him with a barrage of your best profanities and demand an explanation why he didn't show up sooner.

It's been more than a year since they've left us here here completely alone, and he didn't even write.

Tirek made up for it by giving us the princesses, but Discord still owes us at least a proper apology.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 25 Dec 2015 19:22:26 No.25882409 Report

Quoted By: >>25885369

>>25882335
Probably not in the plan, but I like the idea that time runs a lot faster in hell (totally didn't steal that from Constantine)

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 25 Dec 2015 20:54:55 No.25883190 Report

Quoted By:

>>25881703
>On her back
>Hooves tucked above her belly
>Wrapped up tight in a blanket
>Uncertain yet taking comfort in her captor's presence
This my be the most adorable pseudo-bondage to appear in this thread yet.

>>25881712
Well, time to hear what Discord had to say.

Also worth noting that if Luna's dreamwalking is some kind of intrinsic part of who she is - something we can't stop - isolating her from Cadance is going to be near impossible.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1404873202189.png, 191KiB, 500x439

Anonymous Fri 25 Dec 2015 22:30:52 No.25884023 Report

Quoted By:

Merry Christmas SiM

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO discord_riding_luna.jpg, 416KiB, 900x636

Anonymous Sat 26 Dec 2015 00:39:53 No.25885073 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 26 Dec 2015 01:12:39 No.25885369 Report

Quoted By:

>>25882409
funny, I like the idea that time runs slower in hell, seems more torturous to me.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 26 Dec 2015 01:32:40 No.25885524 Report

Quoted By: >>25885616 >>25885723 >>25885994

In the spirit of the Season, what stories would you like to see written? CYOAs, one-shots, or long stories.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 26 Dec 2015 01:45:37 No.25885616 Report

Quoted By:

>>25885524
If I had my choice? I'd like a long story involving AnoNMM. That pairing by Esc is my crack, and I'd love something that explores and develops their relationship in detail.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 26 Dec 2015 01:59:28 No.25885723 Report

Quoted By: >>25905959

>>25885524
My ideal Crimbo miracle would be some Slavelestia spending quality time with Master Anon, or a continuation of the broken Chrysalis story.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 26 Dec 2015 02:28:00 No.25885994 Report

Quoted By:

>>25885524
Honestly, I'd love to see some good ol fashioned someone getting dominated in a dungeon setting (or similar). Seems like we've gone full into the mental and emotional side of things lately, which is great and all, but I miss the simple and dong expanding stuff.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 307281__safe_solo_princess+luna_ (...).png, 588KiB, 900x836

Anonymous Sat 26 Dec 2015 03:49:30 No.25886771 Report

Quoted By:

Up from 10. I may be able to potentially grant a wish here, but it's going to be a few days until I can get some time to write.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 26 Dec 2015 04:21:53 No.25887080 Report

Quoted By: >>25887235 >>25893455

http://strawpoll.me/6364805

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 26 Dec 2015 04:40:40 No.25887235 Report

Quoted By:

>>25887080
Shortstick.. is.. is that you!

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 26 Dec 2015 06:57:57 No.25888387 Report

Quoted By:

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Sat 26 Dec 2015 08:15:56 No.25888934 Report

Quoted By: >>25890080

>Pastebin Update
(COMPLETE) Fall Festival - http://pastebin.com/duJHjuvp

Apparently I missed this story, and never put it in my pastebin. I was digging through my WIPs, and found it. Sorry for the delay.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 26 Dec 2015 11:12:24 No.25889639 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 26 Dec 2015 13:36:33 No.25890080 Report

Quoted By: >>25891363 >>25893767

>>25888934
See, this story really makes me want a follow up where NMM confronts Celestia about NMN. Celestia seemed repentant during Cookies and Tea, but if she did have a hand in the creation or continuance of NMN, that would lead me to suspect otherwise.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 26 Dec 2015 16:44:56 No.25890746 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 26 Dec 2015 18:19:08 No.25891363 Report

Quoted By:

>>25890080
This

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 26 Dec 2015 20:21:20 No.25892490 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 26 Dec 2015 22:12:32 No.25893455 Report

Quoted By:

>>25887080
6 more hours. Just wanted at least 24 hours up. Thank you to those who voted.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 26 Dec 2015 22:52:10 No.25893767 Report

Quoted By: >>25896408

>>25890080
The problem is, any attempt at quantifying what -actually- happened runs a good chance of smacking into various issues. I've seen very good arguments in a whole bunch of directions; especially with how this thread has a tendency to turn into some pretty heavy NMM-waifufaggotry, best to leave it up to everyone's personal opinion on what happened and just go with 'someone screwed up somewhere'.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 795115.png, 423KiB, 803x656

Anonymous Sun 27 Dec 2015 00:03:59 No.25894442 Report

Quoted By: >>25903599

>>25864678

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 27 Dec 2015 02:25:13 No.25895821 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 27 Dec 2015 03:29:46 No.25896408 Report

Quoted By:

>>25893767
>I've seen very good arguments in a whole bunch of directions
Arguments about NMN? Can you summarize them or point me in the right direction? NMN with the SiM continuity is pretty interesting.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO IMG_20151226_221701.jpg, 115KiB, 1150x1020

Anonymous Sun 27 Dec 2015 04:18:34 No.25896897 Report

Quoted By: >>25896914 >>25896940

24 hours have passed and here's the results. Sorry for the shitty phone cap, but I'm dealing with a basement full of water and doing this while I take a quick smoke break.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Screenshot_2015-12-26-22-15-19.png, 2MiB, 1440x2560

Anonymous Sun 27 Dec 2015 04:19:58 No.25896914 Report

Quoted By: >>25896940 >>25896967

>>25896897
Thanks again to those who voted and wish me luck with the fucking basement flooding!

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 27 Dec 2015 04:21:42 No.25896940 Report

Quoted By:

>>25896897
>>25896914
Disregard that, I suck cocks underwater. Got one more hour to go.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 27 Dec 2015 04:23:34 No.25896967 Report

Quoted By: >>25897167

>>25896914
If there's more than a little bit, seriously time to call the insurance and get them to bring people in, especially if it's a finished basement. It's damn hard to properly clean up a serious flood yourself.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 27 Dec 2015 04:39:13 No.25897167 Report

Quoted By: >>25897193

>>25896967
It's pretty bad across the three nearest cities so getting help is pretty much not guaranteed. Dropped by Lowe's earlier and there were so many people wanting to buy those little water pumps that they limited it to one pump per person.

Hell my household is running on a if it's not vital, don't turn it on rule at the monet since we're running seven of those little bastards just to keep the water going down.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 27 Dec 2015 04:41:45 No.25897193 Report

Quoted By: >>25897215

>>25897167
Ah, haven't been watching the news, assumed it wasn't a widescale thing.

Best of luck man.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 27 Dec 2015 04:44:50 No.25897215 Report

Quoted By:

>>25897193
Aye. Not the first time it's happened, so all should be well. Back to work I suppose.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 27 Dec 2015 05:19:18 No.25897555 Report

Quoted By: >>25898958

Well only thing that happened was one additional vote. So we're going forward with that idea. Again thank you for voting.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 27 Dec 2015 07:44:27 No.25898958 Report

Quoted By:

>>25897555
alright

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 27 Dec 2015 11:25:15 No.25900057 Report

Quoted By: >>25900635

Good morning bump

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 27 Dec 2015 14:39:03 No.25900635 Report

Quoted By:

>>25900057
>

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 27 Dec 2015 17:35:04 No.25901574 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 27 Dec 2015 19:00:39 No.25902262 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 558344.jpg, 465KiB, 2197x2990

Anonymous Sun 27 Dec 2015 21:05:00 No.25903599 Report

Quoted By: >>25904574 >>25944716

>>25894442

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 27 Dec 2015 22:28:39 No.25904574 Report

Quoted By: >>25904784

>>25903599
>Broken Armor died

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 27 Dec 2015 22:44:16 No.25904784 Report

Quoted By:

>>25904574
SA a worst

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 28 Dec 2015 00:03:02 No.25905790 Report

Quoted By:

Back from work bump

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 28 Dec 2015 00:20:36 No.25905959 Report

Quoted By: >>25908088

>>25885723
>Broken Chrysalis story
Just to clarify on this, you mean the one cap that's floating around, where she gets drugged on lust?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 28 Dec 2015 02:01:25 No.25907024 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 28 Dec 2015 03:34:40 No.25907912 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 28 Dec 2015 03:49:23 No.25908088 Report

Quoted By: >>25908104 >>25914748

>>25905959
I forget who was writing it, but Chrysalis was a new resident of Nightmare Moon's dungeons and was being broken in by Anon. Last I remember it leaving off, Chrysalis had been surviving on untargeted Love Poison (in this case, the Poison needs a sample of the target individual added to it for it to take full effect and "direct" the love effect) for long enough to get addicted to it, and had finally given up and accepted Anon as her master, culminating in her downing a dose of Love Poison with Anon as the focus, solidifying his hold over her.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 28 Dec 2015 03:51:00 No.25908104 Report

Quoted By:

>>25908088
Oooh. That one. That, I can't help with - sorry about that.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 28 Dec 2015 05:08:58 No.25908873 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 28 Dec 2015 06:00:10 No.25909447 Report

Quoted By:

Bump before bed.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 28 Dec 2015 08:14:56 No.25910818 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 28 Dec 2015 12:09:03 No.25911836 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 28 Dec 2015 15:03:50 No.25912450 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 28 Dec 2015 16:28:18 No.25912748 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 28 Dec 2015 19:23:30 No.25913759 Report

Quoted By:

No one should be forced to use the bathroom after I'm done with it bump.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 28 Dec 2015 19:23:36 No.25913761 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 28 Dec 2015 21:14:35 No.25914748 Report

Quoted By:

>>25908088
This sounds interesting. Bugbutt is second best pone after NMM

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 28 Dec 2015 22:00:49 No.25915199 Report

Quoted By: >>25915329

So this is what SiM meant in the CYOA archive. Here I thought Proportional Punishment had it's own thread.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 28 Dec 2015 22:13:23 No.25915329 Report

Quoted By:

>>25915199
I wish.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 28 Dec 2015 23:55:15 No.25916392 Report

Quoted By:

Blimp

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 29 Dec 2015 01:27:33 No.25917446 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 29 Dec 2015 02:32:36 No.25918187 Report

Quoted By:

>...

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 29 Dec 2015 03:54:38 No.25919070 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 29 Dec 2015 04:06:38 No.25919192 Report

Quoted By:

Thread nearly died earlier
Bump

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 29 Dec 2015 05:37:02 No.25920024 Report

Quoted By:

goodnight bump

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Tue 29 Dec 2015 06:16:28 No.25920313 Report

Quoted By: >>25920319

>>25784120

Alright, here we go.

A bit of green incoming.

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Tue 29 Dec 2015 06:17:32 No.25920319 Report

Quoted By: >>25920333

>>25920313

"I am afraid I don't follow, Master."
>"I know it seems a bit, well, flippant. But I have my reasons."
"But... candies, Master?" Fleur asks, unsure how to proceed.
>"Yes, we'll be dabbling in candies for a bit. Queen Nightmare has been generous to me, but I have been looking over the treasury reports personally... I was surprised at how much I actually spend."
"So this is a way to pay our way, Master?"
>"Indeed. I knew you would grasp the concept quickly." he smiles.
"Where do we begin, sir?" Fleur asks, beaming at the praise.
>"Manehattan." he says with a grunt, hefting a small wooden crate onto the table.
>It's marked 'Fragile' and is emblazoned with Lord Anonymous's seal.
>He opens it and Fleur peers inside.
>Nine familiar looking jars tightly packed so as not to jostle in transit.
>Each jar is labeled with a cutie mark- one of them her own.
>Seeing a harp etched into one of the lids jogs Fleur's memory.
"Master, is Lyra coming with me?"
>"Mhmm." he nods. "She's loading your things as we speak."
>Fleur looks up and smiles warmly.
"Thank you, Master!"
>He just chuckles and scratches her ear.
>"She's your protégé now, Fleur. Still mine, but entrusted to you."
>Fleur examines the jars once more before turning back to her Master.
"Does she also have our Itinerary, sir?"
>"She does. Eager to leave me already?"
"Oh no! Never, sir!" she exclaims, quickly throwing herself at his feet.

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Tue 29 Dec 2015 06:18:45 No.25920333 Report

Quoted By: >>25920342

>>25920319

>What if he's upset?
>He could replace her with Lyra now, she's not trained, but neither was she when she started.
>Why did she have to phrase it like that!?
>Damn it all! Damn it all to Tartarus-
>Wait...
>He's laughing.
>He was teasing us.
>Fleur slowly looks up to see her Master's bright, smiling face.
>With one hand he wipes a tear from his eye, while reaching down to tousle her mane with the other.
>Crouching in front of her, he gets two arms beneath her and returns her to her hooves.
>"I know you'd never leave me." he reassures her, before lightly slapping her flank. "Now get going."
"Yes, Master!" she says with a smile before trotting out of the room.

>Fleur sits, quietly fuming in the carriage as Lyra chuckles across from her.
>In her haste to leave, she completely forgot the crate.
>Idiot.
>Master had sent it down only a moment after her, but she still felt foolish.
>And now Lyra couldn't stop giggling like a little filly.
>Mercifully they'd be landing shortly, which gave Fleur an excuse to speak up.
"Get a hold of yourself, Lyra." she chided. "You mustn't lose composure when representing Master. We reflect him, and you wouldn't want me sending him a poor report."
>"Okay, okay. I'm fine." she says, breathing slowly in and out.

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Tue 29 Dec 2015 06:19:51 No.25920342 Report

Quoted By: >>25920348

>>25920333

"Get your shoes on. We're almost there." Fleur instructs her, levitating her own ornate hoofwear from under her seat.
>Sneaking a peak while fussing with the locks, Fleur is happy to see that Lyra's shoes, while also gold, are very simple.
>Everypony in their place.

>Not long after, the carriage touches down outside of the Plaza Hotel, and Fleur takes one last opportunity to primp, and to adjust Lyra's mane.
>She may have caught Lord Anonymous's attention, but that didn't make her flawless.
>She had much to learn about appearances.
>But that is why Master entrusted Lyra to her.
>Stepping out of the carriage, Fleur floats the keys to her and Lyra's shoes to the lieutenant in charge, and proceeds into the hotel.
>After checking in they were led to adjoining suites on the Penthouse floor.
"Lyra?" Fleur called after touring her abode. "When and where is our first appointment?"
>"Uhhhh... it's in an hour. Aaaat some address."
>Fleur sighs internally.
>Lyra is such a commoner.
"May I see the itinerary?"
>"But Master gave it to meeee." she whines.
"Fine." Fleur snorts in irritation before taking a slow breath. "The address then?"
>"Here it is." Lyra says, stepping into the room.

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Tue 29 Dec 2015 06:20:52 No.25920348 Report

Quoted By: >>25920351

>>25920342

>She floats a scrap of parchment over to Fleur with an address scribbled on it.
>Fleur makes a mental addendum: Lyra is a commoner with indecipherable hoofwriting.
"Very well, Lyra." Fleur sniffs. "Go give this to the driver, then come and get me when it is time to leave."
"Will do!" she smiles and turns to trot away.
"Lyra." Fleur says, turning to go back into her rooms.
>She can hear Lyra pause.
"While we are out on business you will address me as Miss Fleur. Understood?"
>Another pause.
>"Yes, Miss Fleur."
"That's a good pony." Fleur coos, and closes the door behind her.

>Half an hour later Fleur descends the front steps and meets Lyra in the lobby.
>The mint mare bounces with energy.
>"Fleur! The carriage is here and ready to go!" she beams.
>Fleur barely restrains an undignified grimace and nods, following Lyra to the carriage.

>Once the door is shut and the noise of the city fades Fleur turns her attention to the overexcited mare before her.
>How would Master approach this?
>...how did he train her?
>Of course.
>One step at a time.
>Well, two steps this time. It will have to suffice.
"Lyra, I set down a rule earlier. Do you remember what it was?"

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Tue 29 Dec 2015 06:21:53 No.25920351 Report

Quoted By: >>25920358

>>25920348

>The mint mare furrows her brow in concentration as she searches her memory.
"How are you to address me in public?"
>"Ohhhh" she groans, realization dawning on her. "Miss Fleur."
"Just now-"
>"I'm sorry Miss Fleur, I'll remember next time."
"You had better. I have one more rule, and you had better follow both of them when we reach our destination or you'll learn, as I once did, that there are more than merely culinary uses for ginger."

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Tue 29 Dec 2015 06:22:58 No.25920358 Report

Quoted By: >>25920372

>>25920351

>Seeing that she had Lyra's concerned, if confused, attention, Fleur laid down her next rule.
"When you have something important to tell me, whisper it into my ear. Otherwise, remain silent. Master may have entrusted you with the logistics, but negotiations are still in my hooves."
>At this news Lyra throws herself back against her seat and groans.
"Lyra, you have much to learn. Observation is the first step."
>Unconvinced, she proceeds to sulk, staring out the window.
>How Fleur would love to make this mare walk the rest of the way.
>But Master's business comes first.
>But later...she will have to find a reason-ah, an idea!
"Lyra, seeing as you believe that you already know how to act an Envoy of Anonymous, I'll be quizzing you upon our return to the hotel." Fleur states with an evil smile. "Pray you do not fail, pupil."

>Lyra peppered Fleur with questions about the upcoming quiz, most of which she declined to answer.
>All she let on was that it would be an oral exam, failure would merit unpleasant consequences, and the results would be shared with Lord Anonymous.
>The carriage rolled to a stop, and the driver opened the door.
>"B-but Fleur! How can I pass if I don't know what I'm going to be asked!?"
>Stepping on the sidewalk, Fleur made a show of adjusting her mane while speaking in a low voice.
"That is Miss Fleur, now that the door is open, Lyra. And you were the one who didn't think she needed instruction, surely you can pass a simple test?"

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Tue 29 Dec 2015 06:24:11 No.25920372 Report

Quoted By: >>25920378

>>25920358

>With a frustrated whimper, Lyra stepped out of the carriage and followed Fleur up the steps.
>The house was a multistory brownstone in one of the cities wealthiest districts.
>A maid answered the door and led them into a generously appointed sitting room.
>While Lyra melted into the plush couch, Fleur walked the room, her years in Canterlot Society allowing her to appraise the art and decor with a trained eye.
>Knowing the Oranges were relatives of the Apples of Ponyville had led her to believe there would be more folk and country influences in the home, but it seems that the Oranges have truly integrated into a more urbane society.
>Only a few family photos from when relatives came to visit are left to note their roots.
>"Ah, Miss Fleur? Mr. Orange will home shortly, he asked that I show you to his office?"
"Please do." Fleur smiles, as Lyra trots up beside her.

>The office is large and airy, with a monolithic black desk in the center. A few modern art pieces hang on the walls, and a wide window behind the desk overlooks the city.
>The two chairs facing the desk match the minimalist atmosphere in both design and, to Lyra's dismay, comfort.
>Fleur suppresses a giggle, watching Lyra squirm in her seat.
>She, on the other hand, stood near the window, watching the ponies below.
>Finally hoofsteps announce the arrival of Julius Orange.

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Tue 29 Dec 2015 06:26:04 No.25920378 Report

Quoted By: >>25920389

>>25920372

>Strolling through the door, he glanced at the two mares before taking a seat at his desk.
>With a half-hearted apology, he gestured for Fleur to have a seat, but she demurred, standing between the seats instead.
"You are clearly very busy, Mr. Orange. I shall keep this brief. Lord Anonymous requires a custom line of candies for personal reasons. We have the flavoring syrups with us, as well as a detailed list of what he wants and tentative recipes developed by a mare in his service with considerable experience in sweets. We will be in the city, awaiting estimates of cost. Do you have a quill? If so, Lyra here will be able to give you our contact information."
>Thrown off by her abrupt demeanor, Julius fumbles through his desk until he procures a pad of paper and a quill.
>With a nod, Fleur encourages Lyra to take the paper, and she scribbles down the hotel and their suite numbers.
>"It- it will take several days for my engineers to draw up an estimate." he says, rising to take the address from Lyra's magical grasp.
"We will be waiting. I always enjoyed Manehattan."
>"Very well. I'll contact you as soon as it is done. I should get this started right away."
>Fleur nods curtly, and strides from the room, a confused Lyra following.

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Tue 29 Dec 2015 06:27:24 No.25920389 Report

Quoted By: >>25920397

>>25920378

>The ride back to the hotel was silent, until they reached their floor.
>"What happened back there?"
"Ah, interesting. Well, since you asked, I will be generous and leave that out of your pop quiz, Lyra. Come in, please." Fleur answered as she unlocked her door.
>Inside, Lyra sat on the couch while Fleur poured them both dainty glasses of sambuca.
"I have learned a key lesson from Lord Anonymous, Lyra. Information is power." Fleur began, pausing to take a sip.
>After savoring the floral and anise flavors, Fleur swallowed and pressed on.
"We ponies saw knowledge as a means of furthering society: great inventions, leaps forward in medicine, feats of civil and industrial engineering... all of these things Lord Anonymous has a great interest in. But we never considered the power of information on a smaller scale."
>Lyra nearly chokes on her first sip of the strong liqueur, and Fleur smirks.
"Lyra, Lord Anonymous trusts me to represent him because I am acutely aware of ponies. I am an expert at manipulating them based on what I know about them personally. Reading ponies was essential in the entertainment and fashion industries in Canterlot. But to best use my skills, I need to know the pony."
>Fleur suddenly turns to face Lyra directly.
"Tell me Lyra, what did you think of Julius Orange's art collection?"
>"Ech, it was very modern in his office, and the rest looked fancy and expensive."

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Tue 29 Dec 2015 06:28:34 No.25920397 Report

Quoted By: >>25920405

>>25920389

"Indeed. A very basic observation. Let's push deeper though. I'll start with the easy one. Why was his office so minimal?"
>"It made the space seem empty, but huge."
"A good start. It draws emphasis to the enormity of his desk."
>"And the chairs were really uncomfortable! I bet he did that on purpose!"
"He most certainly did, Lyra. Most people used to negotiations try to put the ponies across the table in a situation where they are distracted. This was Mr. Orange's way of doing that."
>"Ohhh, that makes sense!"
"Lyra, do you know anything about art or music?"
>"I know tons about music, I was in the orchestra after all!"
"Good." Fleur smiles gently "And art?"
>"I never needed more fine arts credits at the Academy, so no, I don't really know anything about art."
"That will have to change. But I am sure I can learn more about music from you. This next question will be difficult for you because of your lack of background, I'm afraid."
>Lyra shifts uncomfortably as Fleur pours herself another.
"What is the theme of his art collection, aside from what we've already established is a very modern office?"
>"I have no idea. I didn't look that closely! I'm sorry!"
"Yes, you probably are." Fleur muses. "The theme isn't immediately obvious. But if you examine the signatures, appreciate that they're all originals, then you begin to understand what kind of paintings Julius buys."
>Lyra looks up expectantly.

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Tue 29 Dec 2015 06:29:39 No.25920405 Report

Quoted By: >>25920423

>>25920397

"Expensive ones."
>"Oh come on, Fleur! I could have told you that! Everything there is expensive!"
"Of course you can, that is what the Oranges want you to see! They want to hide their country roots and convince Manehattan that they're real urbanites, capable of rolling with high society!" Fleur exclaims back, downing her drink.
"They have no idea how to actually assemble an art gallery of their own, so they simply go to showings and buy paintings that are obscenely expensive! They keep pictures of family because deep down in their hearts they can't let go, but they arrange things to keep outsiders from really looking at them! They're fakes, Lyra! A mere generation away from farmers! Every bit of interaction we will have with them is going to be about the facade, so keep your eyes open from now on!"
>"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Lyra began to cry. "Please don't tell Master! I'll do better next time!"
"Kiss my shoes." Fleur said, suddenly very quiet.
>"W-what?"
"The intricate golden shoes Lord Anonymous had hand-crafted for me, that I am currently wearing." Fleur elaborated. "Kiss them."
>"W-why?"
"Now."
>"Y-yes Miss Fleur... just please-"
"I'm waiting."
>Lyra slid from her seat and, with unsure steps, approached Fleur.
>Dropping to her knees, she kissed each of Fleur's front hooves.
"And the back."
>Lyra crawled silently behind Fleur and kissed the golden shoes on her hind hooves.
>Fleur turned her head just enough to watch.
"More tongue."

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Tue 29 Dec 2015 06:31:42 No.25920423 Report

Quoted By: >>25920439 >>25923464 >>25925603 >>25975219

>>25920405

>"Miss Fleur...?"
"Your tongue. Use it. Lavish this gift our Master gave me with your finest attention."
>At the invocation of Anonymous, Lyra's pupils shrank, and she reverently set to work dragging her tongue across the polished metal.
>Fleur watched intently as Lyra moved from the first shoe to the second.
>When the mint mare had covered every inch, Fleur stepped forward to let Lyra know she was done.
"For now, you answer to me. And every night, we will discuss the day's events, and at the end of every evening, you will clean these shoes to a shine, just as you did now. Someday Lord Anonymous will see fit to elevate you from apprentice, and then, and only then, will this routine end. Understood?"
>"Yes Miss Fleur." Lyra whimpered.
"You have much to learn, and we have time until Mr. Orange works up a bid for us. In that time I will attempt to educate you on the ways of high society. Meet me back here in one hour, properly dressed and made up for dinner at Delmonicolts." Fleur instructed, then turned and walked into her powder room.
>When she heard the door click shut, she peered back into the room.
>Seeing Lyra was indeed gone, she locked the door to the bathroom, removed her shoes and stepped into the shower.
>Images of Lyra worshipping her hooves danced in her head as Fleur levitated the shower head across her back and further, her tail beginning to lift.
This arrangement just might be worth it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 29 Dec 2015 06:32:57 No.25920431 Report

Quoted By:

>Hawkeye appears
Damn. I'll have to check out this in the morning.

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Tue 29 Dec 2015 06:34:47 No.25920439 Report

Quoted By: >>25922349

>>25920423

And that's all I've got for tonight, folks. I've got internet again, had it for a few months now to be honest. I'll try to stop by regularly again, and there will be more Fleur in time. I've got the plan laid out, all there is to do is write it.

>>25844302
Well.

This was unexpected.

I'm honored, Escapade.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 29 Dec 2015 07:47:25 No.25920921 Report

Quoted By:

>>25881712
Finally got around to reading (been busy with Christmas stuff).

Good update and a nice place to leave it. Anon's move on Cadence felt a little rushed and direct, but we all knew it was going there so there's something to be said about skipping over the long drawn out build up.

I'm the anon who wanted to wait for Cadence to come to us, so woulda liked to see Cadence spend the night with Celestia. Unlikely she would be able to spin things, so probably couldn't do much harm, would build some cred for Anon, and best case she could storm off and seek out Anon for comfort after all.

>dat pic
My new desktop background.

>discord
This could go so many ways. I assume you already have something in mind, but I suspect we're gonna find out why we're going to be here for awhile.

Discord could also totally screw over our plans with Cadence or help them.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 29 Dec 2015 15:06:04 No.25922075 Report

Quoted By:

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Tue 29 Dec 2015 16:08:57 No.25922349 Report

Quoted By: >>25924182

>>25920439
>>25920439
I've happy you aren't upset, an estatic to see more Fleur. I'll drop a more complete critique later.

Would you mind if I used her in another one-shot? I'm tempted to write that Octavia, Fleur, NMM scene, but don't want to step on any toes. She is practically your character.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 29 Dec 2015 19:12:49 No.25923464 Report

Quoted By: >>25924182

>>25920423
>dat ending
Boot licking isn't really my fetish, but the dom/sub element was great. Subtle and simple but immediately dong expanding.

Your brand of green has always been refreshingly different, glad to see you're back.

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Tue 29 Dec 2015 20:41:30 No.25924182 Report

Quoted By: >>25924410

>>25922349

Knock yourself out, man. I mean, it can't be canon simply because it all doesn't fit the timeline in my head (which you had no way of knowing, as I intentionally kept it to myself). But I'm flattered that someone found Fleur interesting enough to write about her themselves.

>>25923464
It really wasn't a fetish of mine until I started writing it for this story. It just seemed to fit her, and evolved with the character. And thank you for the kind words.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 29 Dec 2015 21:01:05 No.25924348 Report

Quoted By:

Honestly it's not the boot licking itself, or the way that it went down (although that was all quite nice as well), it was this bit that really did it for me:

"For now, you answer to me. And every night, we will discuss the day's events, and at the end of every evening, you will clean these shoes to a shine, just as you did now. Someday Lord Anonymous will see fit to elevate you from apprentice, and then, and only then, will this routine end. Understood?"
>"Yes Miss Fleur." Lyra whimpered.

Something about that just hits me hard. Like every day for probably a long time, no matter what she does, this bit of unpleasantness will be part of Lyra's routine. A simple but effective daily reminder of who's in charge.

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Tue 29 Dec 2015 21:08:59 No.25924410 Report

Quoted By: >>25925196

>>25924182
>Canon
While in the strict sense it might not fit canon, the character works well. I like to think that your /character/ for Fleur could fit in, and work in a similar "messenger-ish" position.

Thanks for permission. No promises I'll ever actually write it, but it's interesting enough that I wanted to get it cleared beforehand.

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Tue 29 Dec 2015 22:32:05 No.25925196 Report

Quoted By: >>25936225

>>25924410

Oh, I think it all fits Canon, but that's for other people to decide.

I meant that I have a timeline and such in my head for Fleur and Anon, and your sequence, while thematically fitting for the early stages, is set too close to the events of MoA for my personal headcanon.

If I ever decide to delve into that back story, we might be able to collaborate on something. But I have no plans for that at this time.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 29 Dec 2015 23:11:36 No.25925603 Report

Quoted By: >>25975219

>>25920423
>Finally got a chance to read this
Interesting section. A lot different from the last one, which is good - keeps things from getting stale.

The whole exercise with the Oranges and the art was an interesting one. As it is, it's pretty good - an excellent display of how Fleur works by observing and manipulating the ponies around her to get her way. What was slightly lacking was a follow-up: Explaining how she put that information to use to get inside Julius' defenses. Maybe that will be in the next section, since Fleur still says she has much to teach Lyra? I'm not really considering this a criticism, since Fleur's obviously going to tell her about it at some point.

If you really wanted to be interesting, you could have loosely described what Lyra saw when they entered and allowed the readers to draw their own conclusions - then dropped Fleur's interpretation. That's not a requirement, though - just something that would have been an option.

What did actually mildly bug me throughout this section and the previous one, though, was Lyra's characterization. She was kidnapped, imprisoned, publicly molested, and traumatized by Fleur.... yet in this section she seems flippant around her, almost eager at times. Somewhere along the line she made the jump from 'I am with you because I was just traumatized and you're the only one around' to 'I actually like you and what you do to me'. Did she forget what Fleur did to the others in Ponyville? It feels pretty jarring - like something that should have happened with more time and development.

Or I could be misestimating the timeframe between these couple sections and them leaving Ponyville.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 30 Dec 2015 00:32:17 No.25926435 Report

Quoted By:

>baaammmppp

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO twilight sweating.gif, 910KiB, 391x393

Anonymous Wed 30 Dec 2015 01:06:30 No.25926719 Report

Quoted By: >>25926773

Holy shit, I'm like 3 threads behind. I read the start of the "Anon is buddies with the villains who escaped Tartarus, and now he's in charge of the alicorns" story, which was pretty great, but am I missing much else?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 30 Dec 2015 01:12:44 No.25926773 Report

Quoted By: >>25926818

>>25926719
Bluebird updated, Octavia PoV updated, Tartarus story's had a hell of a lot of updates, a few Escapade one shots, and Hawkeye's returned from the grave with a sequel to Mouth of Anonymous. I think that was everything?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 30 Dec 2015 01:17:43 No.25926818 Report

Quoted By:

>>25926773
>Hawkeye's returned from the grave with a sequel to Mouth of Anonymous.
Hooray! I've been wishing for that story to update more than I've been wishing for Nameless's (still nameless) story to update!

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 30 Dec 2015 02:58:23 No.25927846 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 30 Dec 2015 04:49:50 No.25929144 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 30 Dec 2015 06:17:37 No.25929923 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO cadence 36546954.jpg, 341KiB, 574x850

Anonymous Wed 30 Dec 2015 07:32:03 No.25930520 Report

Quoted By: >>25931004

The current pastebin should be updated again.

I know that "Proportional Punishment" has updated more recently than Nov 30th 2015. The story bin reads Dec 22 2015.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 515247__safe_solo_princess+luna_ (...).png, 628KiB, 800x797

Anonymous Wed 30 Dec 2015 08:53:13 No.25931004 Report

Quoted By: >>25932193

>>25930520
I'll be honest, m8. I don't know how Namefag did it, but updating the line count of 80 stories by hand is a major pain in the ass. I'll get to it when I can.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 30 Dec 2015 12:44:14 No.25932193 Report

Quoted By:

>>25931004
>a lamp shining right on a screen
I mean, whatever works for you Luna, but I think you are doing it wrong.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 30 Dec 2015 17:05:53 No.25933290 Report

Quoted By: >>25933574 >>25942955 >>25943399

If dubs Olibird posts within the hour.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 30 Dec 2015 17:50:19 No.25933574 Report

Quoted By:

>>25933290
Nice try, but only I can summon writefags.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 30 Dec 2015 19:38:50 No.25934344 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 30 Dec 2015 20:35:59 No.25934846 Report

Quoted By:

>page 6 bamp

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO group lets drink.gif, 2MiB, 720x405

Anonymous Wed 30 Dec 2015 21:36:09 No.25935385 Report

Quoted By:

Looking back, I'm kind of surprised at the variety of stories we've got in this thread.

It's not as limited and one-note as most of the other threads I've been to.

Here's to another glorious year with all you faggots.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO mayor mare choke a bitch.jpg, 120KiB, 640x640

Anonymous Wed 30 Dec 2015 22:59:19 No.25936225 Report

Quoted By: >>25939665 >>25942955

>>25925196
The Mouth Of Anonymous story update/sequel doesn't seem to be on your pastebin.

Actually, What's the general pattern for Writefags updating their pastebin after posting in the thread? I'd imagine the best way to do it would be to put the update on the pastebin, post it on the thread over the course of maybe 15 minutes due to the time limitations, and then set the update to "visible" afterward.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 31 Dec 2015 00:26:35 No.25937136 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 31 Dec 2015 01:25:40 No.25937885 Report

Quoted By:

The Endless Sermon continues, I suppose.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 31 Dec 2015 02:39:12 No.25938717 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 31 Dec 2015 03:46:11 No.25939471 Report

Quoted By:

http://pastebin.com/6bLafhr9

I'm just going to drop this here. It's a link to a pastebin I made a while ago that has the story where Anon lost a bet with Rarity.

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Thu 31 Dec 2015 04:07:49 No.25939665 Report

Quoted By: >>25940557

>>25936225

Sorry, forgot to update my bin.

I'm out of town for a few days, I'll do it when I get home.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 31 Dec 2015 05:35:05 No.25940557 Report

Quoted By:

>>25939665
Thank you kindly.

On that note, are there any writefags in the thread who've written short stories and haven't binned them yet?

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 31 Dec 2015 06:47:43 No.25941311 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 31 Dec 2015 08:51:49 No.25942329 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 31 Dec 2015 09:08:48 No.25942428 Report

Quoted By: >>25942955

Where the hell is Oilbird?

Olibird

Olibird Thu 31 Dec 2015 13:51:02 No.25942879 Report

Quoted By: >>25942883

>>25881712
“You mis-matched son of a bitch!”
>You cry out, leaping to your feet, your guest forgotten, still caught in her blankets.
“Where the hell have you been? You disappear for a year and can’t even be bothered to let me know what happened?! I thought you abandoned me!”
>You glance around, looking for any sign of the draconequus.
>Finally, you spot him floating on the other side of a portal that has opened near your ceiling, identical to the one Tirek opened the other day.
>The chimeric creature grins, looking much more solid than you’re accustomed to.
>”Why, isn’t it obvious, Anon? I’ve completed my sentence! I’m a new draconequus! I won’t be causing chaos...snrk!... anymore, because I’m...I’m...reformed!”
>He breaks down laughing, doubling over in the air.
>”Oh, I can’t keep a straight face! They thought they could take the discord out of Discord!”
>He keeps laughing, giving your guest time to begin work on squirming her way out of her warm, snuggly prison.
>Once he’s calmed down, Discord continues, “Isn’t it obvious? I found a way out, and I took it! I didn’t have any way to contact you while still playing houseguest to a herd of humorless horses. Still…I’m surprised you decided to stick around.”
“Right, because it’s so easy for me to just waltz right past Cerberus.”
>”Well, I summoned another ball!” Discord exclaims, as if you had just declared the sun to revolve around the Earth.
>You deadpan as you continue to pour sarcasm all over the floor,
“Yea, that worked SO well last time. So why are you here NOW? You interrupted our quality time.”
>”Is that…” Discord leans in, his snout squashing as though pressing against glass, “Is that...Condense?! Anon, she’s married!”
“Seriously?! You’re going to start with that, too?”
>You rub your fingers against your temples, before you look back at your guest who has just barely gotten a foreleg free.

Olibird

Olibird Thu 31 Dec 2015 13:52:08 No.25942883 Report

Quoted By: >>25942887

>>25942879
“Cadance? Why does everyone think I want to rape you?”
>She pauses her hoofing at the ground to answer, “I...I don’t know, master. Tirek kind of hinted that you’d do something like that, but...” she trails off, not even looking at you.
>Turning back to Discord, you see him tugging at his goatee, “Well, there was the time with the Changeling-”
“Why are you here?!”
>Great.
>It’s not even been five minutes and he’s already screwing up how your guest sees you..
>”Oh, fine! I see Celestia’s ALREADY rubbing off on you.” With a snap of his fingers, Discord summons a rather cushy chair and settles down in it.
>“I’m hoping you’ve been able to uncover the location of the fourth alicorn, Twilight Sparkle? My only lead seems to be a dud.”
>He points a claw off to the side.
>The portal’s view pans in that direction, revealing a rather quaint looking town with Tirek towering over panicking multicolored ponies, the equines running this way and that.
>...DAMN he really got fit.
>You need to get ahold of his regiment...for...reasons.
>He pulls open the door to a thatched cottage and magically levitates the terrified residents before him.
>”Oh no…” Cadance whines, her voice coming from beside you.
>With a glance, you see she’s made it free and is standing next to you. “Not Ponyville…”
>One at a time, Tirek pulls some glowing...stuff, for lack of a better word, out of the ponies and consumes it.
>He rumbles out, “No,” after each pony, before he tosses them, quite literally, over his shoulder and repeats the process with another house.
>Huh.
>So that’s what his whole ‘consuming magic’ shtik looks like.
>The “camera” turns back to face Discord, who’s still lounging in that chair.
>”Don’t let his new look fool you, he’s as crotchety as always. You know as well as I that he’s probably going to lose his temper soon...and now he can actually do some real damage when he does. So, any luck?”

Olibird

Olibird Thu 31 Dec 2015 13:53:15 No.25942887 Report

Quoted By: >>25942906

>>25942883
>You know...you knew you were forgetting to do something.
“No. I haven’t had a chance to even ask them, after you guys ruined my hunt and dropped them off in the middle of nowhere.”
>”Anon, you’ve had them for three weeks!”
>That statement strikes you like a blow to the head.
“...Huh?!”
>You knew your sense of time has been ruined but...there’s no way it was THAT badly screwed up, was it?
>”Three weeks?!” Cadance cries out behind you, “Ohh no, no, no, no, no...Shining must be worried sick! Discord? Is he alright?”
>”I assure you, Shining Armor is unharmed.” A malicious glint appears in Discord’s mismatched eyes, “but HE is...such a strong word, don’t you think?”
>...He didn’t...
>Cadance blinks, not comprehending. “Wh-what…?”
>With a dismissive wave of his paw, Discord sounds as though he’s talking about going for a stroll.
>“Oh, you know how the ponies of the Crystal Empire are. Without a “Crystal Princess,” they started to panic! So I took the only royalty around and gave them EXACTLY what they wanted.”
>He did.
>There’s a thud as your guest sits down hard, the information having sank in before you had a chance to run damage control.
>Glancing, you see her pupils have shrank to pinpricks.
>Great.
>You need to do something about this.
>Kneeling down, you look her in her shell shocked eyes, rubbing a hand over her withers.
“Don’t worry, Cadance! I’m SURE what Discord means is that he helped disguise your husband, so that way your subjects won’t think there’s anything out of the ordinary.”
“He’d never do something like turn your husband into a mare! Right. Discord?”
>Turning your head back at the end, you give him a murderous glare, demanding he, if nothing else, play along.
>He answers with a look of his own, saying ‘You owe me.’
>”Oh, you know how to take the fun out of everything. YES, I only disguised Shining.”

Olibird

Olibird Thu 31 Dec 2015 13:56:23 No.25942906 Report

Quoted By: >>25942912

>>25942887
>”If it wasn’t for your sudden obsession with comic books, hobbyist miniatures, and a predilection for using the wrong bathroom, they’d have no idea you were replaced, Candy.”
>Yea, it's a blatant lie, but hopefully Cadance still hasn't recovered enough to be realize it.
>”Really, I’m not sure why you two are making such a fuss. It’s only TECHNICALLY been three weeks.”
>He raises his eagle claw with a grin, ready to snap his fingers, “Want to watch me make it a month?”
>Before you can respond, he snaps his fingers, and, behind him, the sun descends at a speed no celestial body has any right to move, the sky quickly darkening.
>Your jaw hits the ground as the moon moves in to replace it at the same blinding speed.
“Did you just…”
>He holds up a finger to silence you, “Hang on!”
>After a moment, the moon seems to shake in the air, rocking back and forth.
>Discord’s grin widens, stretching impossibly from ear to ear before the moon rockets down, the sky brightening as the sun moves back into place...and overshoots it, soon flying down the opposite horizon.
>Your draconequus friend bursts out laughing, doubling over in his chair as the moon mimics the sun, flying through the sky from one horizon to the other.
>The show repeats a good half dozen times before the sun seemingly skids to a halt at...roughly its original location.
>”It doesn’t get old!” Discord cries out between bouts of raucous laughter, “She doesn't get any better at it!”
>You feel like there’s a joke you’re missing, here.
>You knew he claimed he was a trapped god, that he was powerful, magically but...it never really sank in that ALL his stories about playing tapdance with the laws of physics were true.
>...
>You’re best friends with a damn near omnipotent being!
>Not only that...you just bossed him around.
>Before you have a chance to recover mentally, Discord leans in, with that same manic tone.

Olibird

Olibird Thu 31 Dec 2015 13:57:41 No.25942912 Report

Quoted By: >>25942917

>>25942906
>“Is Celestia there? I’d LOVE to see the look on her face when she finds out her ‘Favorwite Stooodent’ is making a mockery of her sun!”
>That snaps you out of your funk...your guest, however, is long gone, a far-off look in her eyes.
“I uh...she’s in the cage. After trying to run away a few times.”
>Discord snickers, “The changeling cage? I still don’t know why you kept that thing…”
>”Discord!” Tirek booms out, denying you the chance to come up with a snappy comeback, “They aren’t here!”
>Your friend’s chair vanishes, and he stands back up to be eye level with the swole centaur.
>”Well, I don’t understand why they WOULDN’T be! I didn’t give them any reason to doubt that I wasn’t “reformed!”
>”All you did was learn what plausible deniability was! You gave in too quickly and she must have known it!” Tirek snarls out and grabs Discord by the throat.
>The draconequus raises a finger, gasping out, “What if we try blowing up Twilight’s tree-bary? Maybe that will get her out of hiding?”
>”How in the WORLD would that help?! She isn’t HERE, you ignoramus!” Tirek roars as his horns begin to glow.
>Ho boy, he’s really pissed. “You’ve done nothing but slow me down this entire time! Give me ONE reason why I should keep you around!”
>...This is going to end bad if you don’t do something.
>Even with their powers restored, they apparently as just as likely to clash as they were before.
“Hey, hey, hey! How about you wait to kill each other until AFTER you get the two of us out of here?!”
>You drape your arm around Cadence to emphasise the ‘both,’ your guest glued to the scene unfolding before you.
>Whelp.
>If you weren't concerned about your chances of them breaking you out before, you are now.
>Tirek, pauses, his horns depowering. ”Is that…” his expression softens and he looks around, taking a moment to spot the portal. “It is! It’s our favorite human!

Olibird

Olibird Thu 31 Dec 2015 13:58:46 No.25942917 Report

Quoted By: >>25945214 >>25948093

>>25942912
>“And the pink alicorn. In MY room?” Letting your other friend go, Tirek bends down and peers at the two of you, Cadance tensing up in fear.
>You squeeze her with the crook of your arm, silently letting her know that there’s nothing she needs to worry about.
>Sadly, it doesn’t do much to get her to relax.
“Yea, the pink one that you shouldn’t have sent here. And let’s get one thing straight, it’s my room now, you got out.”
>Having mostly recovered from his recent throttling, Discord speaks up, his voice still slightly pained,
>”Our good friend was just telling me that he hasn’t been able to get the princesses to tell him where Twilight’s hiding, either. I was thinking, perhaps he could use a little assistance.”
>Tirek looks back towards Discord, his scowl returning, “You just want to see if you can use me as a battery.”
>Discord, in turn, pulls out his snaggletoothed grin, “Oh, is it that obvious? I was thinking we could see about getting our human friend some assistance.”
>”No,” comes Tirek’s curt reply.
>”Well, unless you have a better idea, we’re stuck waiting around until Twilight makes her move.”
“What are you guys talking about?”
>Your question falls on deaf ears, as Tirek marches up and glares at Discord, his beady eyes matching Discord’s comparatively large and larger ones.
>After a moment, he spits out, “Fine.”
“Anyone want to inform the human of your master plan?”
>”I’d be happy to!” your non-roid raging friend speaks up, breaking from the impromptu staring contest to slither over to the portal.
>”To put it simply, we’re going to see if we can temporarily overpower the ward to send you a...care package. Any one item you need to...get through to them.”
>With a wicked grin, he leans in and glares at Cadance, who still hasn’t managed to calm down.
>He jerks back, looking at you, ”Well? What would you like? Try not to make it too complex, or you’ll make ol’ Tirek cry.”

Olibird

Olibird Thu 31 Dec 2015 14:06:29 No.25942955 Report

Quoted By: >>25943399 >>25951481

You know, this update would have fit a lot better thematically if I had actually finished it for Christmas like I had originally planned. This exchange proved to be a LOT more difficult to write than I had thought.

>>25942428
Sorry, I would have been here sooner, but >>25933290 didn't get dubs. Blame him.

>>25936225
>What's the general pattern for Writefags updating their pastebin after posting in the thread?
While I can't answer for anyone else, I know the pastebinning it beforehand doesn't work for me, because I end up making last second changes after pasting it here and waiting for post timer to count down. Instead, I try to update it right afterwards. Except when I'm a lazy faggot. Like right now.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 31 Dec 2015 15:33:45 No.25943399 Report

Quoted By: >>25945870 >>25948093 >>25951481

>>25942955
With friends like these, who needs enemies. I'm actually happy there is no way we can reach out and bitchslap them, because that's what I want to do right now and would regret it afterwards.

>one item
Hold on a sec... he can send here three ponies WITH magical chains attached, easily... but sending one item is suddenly a big deal? Can't the just... umm... "pack" the items into a pony and send them to us that way?

Either there is a big flaw in logic here, or Discord's just fucking with us again.
>"Ho ho ho, I have a better idea! Instead of sending him all he needs to make this operation successful as quickly as possible, we'll tell him he can get just ONE thing! Won't that be HILARIOUS!"

Anyway... If we really can only get one item i say we take a big barrel of food. It will allow us to forego the dangerous and time consuming hunting for a few weeks, and allow us to spent all our time and effort on our guests.

Alternatively we could ask for some useful tool we can't make ourselves. How about a sword? It's not the best thing for hunting, but we can make another spear with some effort, and if our cage ever comes under attack... for a human, there is no better weapon than a sword when it comes to proper fighting.

Another thing I can think off is a proper bed... one of those big, openable ones would allow us to get comfy And could be used as a makeshift cell for our other prisoner.

Or... if discord wants to be so helpful, why don't we ask Tirek to send discord himself? Then he can make us all we need right here.

>changeling
Explain to Cadance that it wasn't rape, the changeling offered services in exchange for food... the cage was used only just to make sure it maintained it's part of the bargain... the whole thing was entirely consensual.

>>25933290
This is all your fault, faggot!

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 31 Dec 2015 17:09:08 No.25943933 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1046945.jpg, 342KiB, 1280x1454

Anonymous Thu 31 Dec 2015 18:42:43 No.25944716 Report

Quoted By: >>25946179 >>25947943

>>25903599

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 31 Dec 2015 19:50:38 No.25945214 Report

Quoted By: >>25945870

>>25942917
What the fuck could we need that would magically bend them to our will?

We need more time! You can't just break age old princesses. Wait....Did Luna or Celestia keep a diary? That would be an amazing insight into them while updating us on what really happened.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 31 Dec 2015 21:14:10 No.25945870 Report

Quoted By: >>25951481

>>25945214
I doubt that there's anything that'd be long term beneficial along those lines.

I would agree with >>25943399 in that I would ask for a pallet, more than a barrel, of supplies. That would help you get things moving easier. You'd still have to go forage, which is good as it gives you alone time with Cadence, but it takes the pressure off so you can be more deliberate with your excursions.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 31 Dec 2015 21:48:30 No.25946179 Report

Quoted By:

>>25944716
>Nightmare bondage
Ooooh, I like this. Wing sheath is a bit weird, but not bad. We don't see enough of Moony getting dominated.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 31 Dec 2015 23:23:09 No.25947109 Report

Quoted By:

News Years Party bump.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 174119.jpg, 158KiB, 1280x1155

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 00:46:38 No.25947943 Report

Quoted By: >>25957088

>>25944716

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 00:59:03 No.25948093 Report

Quoted By:

>>25942917
Seems a bit dull, but I'd say >>25943399
is right on food, it removes the dangers of having to deal with hunting and means we can focus all of our attention on the princesses.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 02:35:32 No.25949146 Report

Quoted By:

>>25757388

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 04:33:42 No.25950311 Report

Quoted By:

>>25757388
Is it just me or we moving faster than usual tonight?

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 05:41:33 No.25951115 Report

Quoted By: >>25951191 >>25951386 >>25951481

Well, 2015 was essentially a year without Nameless. How do you guys think our last year compared to the first? Do you think we can last a third? Or will submission one day be optional?

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 05:47:57 No.25951191 Report

Quoted By: >>25951481

>>25951115
We've slowed down, no doubt about it. I don't think it will last eternal, but nothing ever does on this board. We've still got material to cover yet, though, so I'm not throwing in the towel.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 06:05:27 No.25951386 Report

Quoted By: >>25951884 >>25975726

>>25951115
I'm sure it has been discussed before, but has anyone considered just continuing his story?

Now I know that it won't be his story as anyone that would take that upon themselves may not have the same fetishes or knowledge of fetishes or bdsm etc etc. Their visions would differ greatly.

I just had an idea as I was typing.

Nameless' story essentially stopped with Twilight having escaped her bonds and telling Anonymous to come with her right? What if and I know she only learned the spell when she was an alicorn, what if Twilight cast a time travel spell and just like the whole Season 5 ending episodes it creates various timelines?

It would give any writefag damn near carte blanche (blank check) to do as they please. Has anyone ever thought it if from this perspective?

It would theoretically advance the story, while leaving nameless' story untouched. Well relatively untouched as if he ever returned, he probably wouldn't go with that idea.

Thoughts?

Also happy New Years you freaks. Dropping a small update shortly.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 06:16:22 No.25951481 Report

Quoted By: >>25951591 >>25953355

>>25951191
>>25951115
I think MrNameless disappearing caused a slowdown for sure, but the fandom is shrinking in general and this has always been a niche. We're lucky to still have several regular contributers of green.

I definitely miss the early days though where we had a lot of occasional contributers. Not entirely sure what happened there. We'll occasionally get someone new show up, drop a some green, and disappear forever. Maybe our standards are too high (or we give that impression) or maybe it's just a lack of response in general to stories that arn't one of the established writers?

>>25943399
>>25945870
I disagree with the food thing. I think taking Cadence out and showing her the horrors of Taturus is exactly what Anon wants to be doing to re-enforce his position.

So then what? Maybe something purely for Cadence's comfort.. that would be kinda manipulative (but maybe obviously so). Going the other direction, something to punish the sisters with? Or the obvious, something utilitarian like a spear or sword or what have you.

>>25942955
I absolutely loved this. You nailed discord and Tirek, and I love the whole alternate parallel to canon timeline you're doing. In the show of course Tirek turns on Discord, so I feel it's at least a possibility that's coming up soon.

Said it before, but this is a fucking epic CYOA.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 06:27:13 No.25951591 Report

Quoted By: >>25951659 >>25951741 >>25951884 >>25975219

>>25951481
>I definitely miss the early days though where we had a lot of occasional contributers. Not entirely sure what happened there.

Two things. One, when contributors started dropping we lost our other settings first and the original SiM setting rapidly became nearly the only commonly-greened thing here. Without the story to drive it though, it seems like we're clinging to a dead setting instead of opening up to everything.

Second, frankly, our reputation as 'edgelord general' isn't doing us any favors. Mind you, it isn't wrong exactly, but having that be the near-universal reaction people have to our thread isn't helpful. I think it's moved beyond just 'here resides the darker stuff' to 'domain of the edgiest of edges, anything less than absolute grimdark not accepted'.

That's my two cents on it, anyhow.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 06:35:22 No.25951659 Report

Quoted By: >>25951741 >>25975219

>>25951591
>edgelord general
Sad thing is, there's some truth to it. This general definitely leads on the harsher stuff, and while there's been some well received softer stuff, in general it seems to get a less warm response.

Part of that might be the chicken and egg problem. No softer content means no readers who enjoy that kinda thing which means no one writes it.

Personally I love the shit out of mild consensual bondage/pet play, stuff along the lines of Twilights Pet, but I feel like it wouldn't get much love here.

Shortstick !!pfAmNY4T4Hx

Shortstick !!pfAmNY4T4Hx Fri 01 Jan 2016 06:43:12 No.25951741 Report

Quoted By:

>>25951591
>>25951659
Well I'm certainly not about to make things any less edgier.

Shortstick !!pfAmNY4T4Hx

Shortstick !!pfAmNY4T4Hx Fri 01 Jan 2016 06:44:13 No.25951754 Report

Quoted By: >>25951758

>You picked up the mare and set her down on your lap asking her to make a garter for little Sweetie Belle.
>"As you wish master." Rarity purred enjoying the roughness with which you groped her rear, gasping aloud as you suddenly gave her plump derriere a firm smack.
>For the past half hour you'd both discussed what kind of garter you wanted made for the filly, your pants noticeably soaked from Rarity's juices.
>While not one for fashion the only stipulation you set for Rarity was that the fabric be pink and able to accommodate one of the little vibrator bullets.
>Giving her a quick kiss you watched from the couch as a multitude of fabrics and tools rapidly swirled around the room.
>You lay back as you watched Rarity go on about designs and matching outfits for her and Sweetie Belle before she loudly gasped.
>"I could even make you an immaculate suit master! The three of us would look amazing!"
"Just the garter Rarity."
>"Of course master." She sadly replies before returning to her work.
"Perhaps at a later time pet, but for now just the garter. I'll be taking a short nap my dear wake me in half an hour if you would."
>She nods and returns her attention to the taut fabric in front of her and the ruler that pressed against it.
>Your vision slowly faded to the sight of Rarity casually shaking her rear as she hummed a little tune.
>In what was a blink of an eye your dreamless sleep was interrupted by quiet slurps and gentle smacks.
>That familiar tingle in your loins eased your transition from the void back to consciousness.
>Your fingers slide through Rarity's mane as she continued working her tongue around the your glans.
"Getting greedy aren't you Rarity?"
>She releases your member with a lewd pop and nuzzles it with the tip of snout.
>"But Master, you love it when I wake you like this." She talks to your member like a baby before devouring it once more.

Shortstick !!pfAmNY4T4Hx

Shortstick !!pfAmNY4T4Hx Fri 01 Jan 2016 06:45:14 No.25951758 Report

Quoted By: >>25951770 >>25951778

>>25951754
>Out of reflex you thrust your hips upwards, your penis surging deep into the unsuspecting mare's throat.
>Rarity gave a muffled moan of surprise as she jerked her head back.
"How much time do we have before we need to leave Rarity?"
>She slowly pulled her head back while slithering her tongue around your shaft.
>Rarity's tongue wrapped around the underside of your glans as she gently suckled. "Wuh goht twhunty minnuts."
>You grabbed hold of her head and pulled towards your groin while thrusting upwards.
>Rarity gasped again, her tongue writhing around your trashing dick as your seed spewed forth and filled her mouth.
>You sigh and lean back, releasing your grip on her head.
"That's not nearly enough time to have a lot fun. Perhaps next time?"
>Rarity slurps and gulps as she looks for more of your semen.
"I'm going to need you to dress up before we head out my dear."
>You pause as her tongue tickled your frenulum in its search for more cum.
"I think a nice short black dress or skirt with some black garter stockings and some nice lacy red panties would do nicely."
>Rarity kissed your tip and nodded.
>"I've got just the thing master!"
>She pressed her muzzle against your groin and took a deep breath before running off.
>The sounds of Rarity trying on outfits at a quick pace echoed from upstairs while you made changed your pants.
>"Oh Anon!" Rarity called out as she sauntered down the stairs.
>Rarity exaggerated her hips natural sway and held her tail high.
>"What do you think?" She asked as she struck a few poses.
>You spin your index finger in the air while reaching for the wireless vibrator.
>Rarity nodded and spun in place only to be be stopped when you snatched her rear and pulled her closer.
>Ignoring her surprised squeak you pulled down her already moist panties and inserted the toy into her canal.
>Her little button winked as the vibrator progressed further, her arousal coating your finger.

Shortstick !!pfAmNY4T4Hx

Shortstick !!pfAmNY4T4Hx Fri 01 Jan 2016 06:46:15 No.25951770 Report

Quoted By:

>>25951758
>Removing your finger from her grip with a small pop, you replaced her panties and gave her a firm smack on the ass causing her to yelp.
"Let's go my dear."
>Rarity walked by your side with her rear swaying ever so gently.
>A short walk later and you saw the school house come into view.
>"Rarity."
>The mare looked your way and smiled.
>"Yes Anon?"
"I recall you saying that Mrs. Cheerilee asked about our sex life. Had you ever thought about enlightening her?"
>"Well I wouldn't mind doing it, but how could I bring it up in conversation?"
"Rarity my dear, take a second look at what you're wearing."
>The mare blushed and nodded.
"I've never seen any mares dress up in such a manner in public, so I guarantee it'll be the first thing she comments on."
>You resumed walking towards the mulberry colored pony who busied herself by watching over the colts and fillies playing their games.
>She turned to face you as you neared, her gaze lingering on you for a moment before she looked Rarity over.
>"Good afternoon Rarity, Anonymous!" She called out once you'd gotten close enough.
>"Hello Mrs. Cheerilee, how are you doing this fine day?" Rarity greeted the mare.
>You waved hello and kept quiet.
>"Are you two here to pick up Sweetie Belle?" Cheerilee asked. "Because the little ones have about another 10 minutes before schools out."
"We can wait Mrs. Cheerilee, it's not that long of a wait after all."
>You walked a few paces away, looking towards the school grounds attempting to locate Sweetie Belle.
>Rarity and Cheerilee began whispering to one another and occasionally sneaking glances your way.
>Smiling as you fumbled around with the contents in your pocket, you pull out a small box with a knob and and two buttons.
>You turn the knob all the way to the lowest setting and rub your thumb over the on button.
>Cheerilee gasps and looks your way, her ears laying back with a small blush on her face.

Shortstick !!pfAmNY4T4Hx

Shortstick !!pfAmNY4T4Hx Fri 01 Jan 2016 06:47:16 No.25951778 Report

Quoted By: >>25951788

>>25951758
>You can only imagine what Rarity told her as you pressed down on the button to bring the egg vibrator to life.
>Rarity gave off a high pitched squeal as she threw her forelegs around Cheerilee's neck.
>The fillies in the playground stopped for a moment, curiously looking over to where you were.
>You slowly wave hello to the large group and look over at the two mares.
>Cheerilee's body trembled ever so slightly as Rarity moaned into her ear.
>"Rarity?" The mare asked, her tail twitching slightly side to side. "Are you alright?"
>The children lost interest and resumed their games.
>Turning off the vibrator you walked towards the mares.
"You okay Rarity, you look a little red?"
>"I'm f-fine Anon, just seem to have suffered a slight dizzy spell."
>You placed your palm on her forehead for a few seconds.
"You don't seem to have a fever, but it'd be for the best if you lay down for a bit when we get back home."
>Rarity exhaled and nodded, still holding onto Cheerilee as you went back to the wooden fence.
>"Are you sure you're alright Rarity, you look positively riled up?" Cheerilee questioned.
>Rarity simply nodded and let go of the other mare.
>"Yes Mrs. Cheerilee, I'm fine." She replied as her body trembled slightly.
>You glanced back at the fillies and then to the mares who returned to their whispers.
>"That's so risque!" Cheerilee's voice rose from a whisper.
>You yawned and looked back to see the teacher trotting towards you.
>"Well Anonymous." She glanced at Rarity, her voice trailing off.
>"It would seem looks can be deceiving and I must admit I'm a tad bit jealous."
>She trotted past you towards the school house and turned around before getting too far.
>"Please take care of my friend Anonymous, she may be a bit high maintenance, but I assure you she's worth it."
"Don't worry Mrs. Cheerilee, I'm taking very good care of her."
>Cheerilee smiled back to you and nodded. "Yes, that's exactly what she said."

Shortstick !!pfAmNY4T4Hx

Shortstick !!pfAmNY4T4Hx Fri 01 Jan 2016 06:48:17 No.25951788 Report

Quoted By: >>25951797

>>25951778
>She turned around and made her way inside the school house.
>Rarity nuzzled against your leg, prompting you to scratch behind her ears.
"So how did it go Rarity?"
>"It was exhilarating master!" Rarity beamed with joy. "Mrs. Cheerilee couldn't believe how often we made love, she almost didn't believe me when I told her abou."
>That was as far as she got with her reply before you pressed the on button.
>Rarity gasped and wrapped her forelegs around your thigh, her hind legs shaking as she bit her lip and quietly moaned.
>Her moans grew louder as you raised the power on the vibrator until she bit into your thigh.
>It wasn't a bite with intention to hurt, but rather as a way of keeping her moans from escalating any further.
>The loud cheering from inside the schoolhouse was your cue to turn the vibrator off.
>Rarity gently licked at your thigh, her breath slowly returning to normal as her tongue methodically rubbed on the fabric.
"That's enough Rarity, the fillies and colts are coming out."
>The doors burst open as if on cue and the young ones rushed out in a tidal wave of chaos.
>Rarity jumped into your arms as the mass approached your position, her tail coiling around your forearm like a serpent.
>"Whoa I almost slipped!" Yelped a random colt as he ran by.
>The surge slowly became a trickle until Sweetie Belle and her friends trotted up.
>"Hello Mr. Anonymous!" The orange filly greeted you, her wings fluttering as she tried to hover for a moment.
"Hello girls, how are you all doing?"
>"Ah'm actually in a hurry everypony." Applebloom spoke up. "Ah promised my sis Ah'd help gather apples from the southern acre today."
>"Ah man, I was hoping we could go crusading!" Scootaloo huffed. "You got any plans Sweetie Belle?"
>The white filly was looking up at Rarity and you, her little nose slightly scrunching as she sniffed the air.
>Scootaloo tapped the filly's horn. "Equestria to Sweetie Belle! Hello?"

Shortstick !!pfAmNY4T4Hx

Shortstick !!pfAmNY4T4Hx Fri 01 Jan 2016 06:49:18 No.25951797 Report

Quoted By: >>25953355 >>25975553

>>25951788
>"Huh, wha, who?" Sweetie Belle stuttered.
>"I asked if you had anything planned tonight?" Scootaloo repeated her question.
>"Oh, I uh, yeah, Anonymous is taking Rarity and me out to dinner tonight." She replied, her ears drooping slowly as she lied to her friend.
>"Oh well. I guess I'll go hang out with Twist, maybe we can go help Applebloom for some apples or something." Scootaloo gave her friend a hug and trotted off.
>"Enjoy your dinner Sweetie Belle!" She called out from the distance.
>Sweetie Belle waved goodbye to her friend then turned to you.
"Dinner Sweetie Belle? Well I suppose I can have some dessert before the main course tonight."
>"D-do we have to Anon?" Sweetie asked solemnly.
>You traced you finger on Rarity's moist panties in an S pattern, you digit slightly pressing the fabric into her slit.
"Of course Sweetie. I even have a special sauce for the main course."
>Rarity's hind legs jerked a bit as you went knuckle deep into her.
"Let's go. Now."
>Sweetie Belle nodded and followed after you and Rarity, her mind racing as to what could possibly await her at home.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 06:53:24 No.25951823 Report

Quoted By: >>25951841 >>25951884 >>25953026 >>25959019

I can't say how often I'll be updating. I certainly find it harder to get things going once I sit down and stare at the blank page.

If this general is going to decide to cut down on the "edge" then I'll need to know before I start the next section and the whole Spike section down the line.

So do give me a heads up if this general is going to go soft.

Happy New Years everyone. Here's a shot of Tequila for all around!

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 06:56:00 No.25951841 Report

Quoted By: >>25954312

>>25951823
I don't think anyone is proposing we curtail the edge, writers should write how they want, just would be nice to attract some softer stuff/an audience for said softer stuff I think. Little diversity.

Olibird

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Words of Wisdom.jpg, 51KiB, 500x666

Olibird Fri 01 Jan 2016 07:01:55 No.25951884 Report

Quoted By: >>25951983 >>25953026 >>25954312 >>25957405 >>25975553

>>25951386
>Thoughts?
Alright, I'm naming up for this. I find the concept of continuing another writer's story (without their permission) to be absolutely disrespectful. If I woke up and saw someone decided to finish Safeword "for" me, I'd be pissed. There's a world of difference between writing using a setting and declaring "THIS is how the story ends!"

With that said, before Punishment, I had considered taking the Sunset story and seeing how close to SiM I could get. I still wouldn't have claimed it to BE SiM, though.

>>25951591
>our reputation
I'll fully admit, I KNOW I didn't do the thread's reputation any favors with Safeword. The fact that there's STILL a Slave Pone general separate from this one shows that we have a serious issue. I just have no idea how to begin fixing it, or if we even can.

The thing is, if there was any truth to it, you guys would have turned Punishment into a rape fest from moment one, or abused Jewel in Crystals and Collars. Yea, we do lean right on the edge when it gets fetishy, but for the most part, it seems to me like we've moved away from the ultraviolent >rape territory.

>>25951823
I'm so hyped to see this continue. I'll read it in the morning, but I don't think the general needs to cut back on what we have going now. I think, if anything, we should encourage other writers who want to write softer stories, while still continuing what we have.

I'd say >pic related said it best.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 07:16:10 No.25951983 Report

Quoted By:

>>25951884
You didn't do anything bad for the rep either, though. It's no worse than any of the other >rape greens that get written on a daily basis.

If I can offer a counterpoint to your comment about turning things into a rape fest, though, I don't think it's that simple. Yes, we don't always jump for the rape and like to play the long game. However, the mental misery factor isn't so innocent either; writing about characters having their wills broken and crushed into obedient servants is pretty edgy too. Not having the immediate fetish payoff for it can make it seem even more edgy (though, in a counterpoint to a counterpoint, one might also argue that seeing them mentally crushed like that -is- the fetish).

Now, I'm immensely guilty of this myself. My own writing has a lot of that kind of mental playing around with no immediate sex payoff, so I'm not trying to cast myself as the innocent looking down on the guilty by any means. I'm not arguing for excluding or telling people not to write something in particular either; that never goes anywhere good.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 09:11:31 No.25952842 Report

Quoted By:

Hawkeye

Hawkeye Fri 01 Jan 2016 09:45:20 No.25953026 Report

Quoted By: >>25955241

>>25951823

Welcome back, however briefly.

>>25951884
I didn't mind when Escapade wrote that short for the Fleur series. It was rather touching, honestly. Even if it does fit my headcanon, it was nice to see someone appreciated my work that much.

And Mouth of Anonymous has not helped our reputation either. While Fleur herself rarely gets involved directly, she is guilty of overseeing the gang-rape of the flower sisters as well as leaving Bon-bon bound and exposed for the purpose of being raped.

All that being said, I think we lost a lot of people in the storm around ERA and Vhatug.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 10:43:58 No.25953355 Report

Quoted By: >>25954065 >>25954312 >>25955241

>>25951481
>but the fandom is shrinking in general
this.
I used to be a massive fan of the show, but the latest seasons have been getting worse S5 is just hard to watch, it feels like an autistic meta fanfiction headcannon of faust's two and a half seasons, I struggle to watch an episode now instead of looking forward to one.

>>25951797
10/10
I honestly dropped your story when you first posted the scat section. However a month ago I picked it up again planning to skip through the 'shitty' bits, I'm so glad I read it again! Your story is my wet dream of the perfect sexual fantasy that I would never dream of doing irl.
Saved into my favourite clops and I'm looking forward to the sweetie belle parts as long as they're not 'crappy'.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 14:45:00 No.25954065 Report

Quoted By: >>25954312 >>25955241

>>25953355
>S5 is just hard to watch, it feels like an autistic meta fanfiction headcannon

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 15:55:45 No.25954312 Report

Quoted By: >>25955241 >>25975726

>>25951884
You're the only one to reply to the suggestion and while I do agree with you that finishing another writefag's story is in poor taste, if you'd followed the suggestion of time travel, then you would essentially be doing a spin off and continuing a completely new branching story at your discretion without interfering with the orginal SiM. You'd have the setting and characters, free to change whatever detaisl you wanted to as a result of the time travel spell. The most difficult part to justify is just how Twilight was able to learn the spell itself. Seeing as you're the only one who even bothered to reply gives little no no chance of it happening, but at least I can say that I gave a suggestion, however it was received.

>>25951841
>>25951884
Perhaps I'm unaware of what drama has occurred since I've last been here. Anyone willing to discuss it via pastebin messages lest we open up old wounds?

>>25953355
Would it be considered "shitty" if I were to describe how the ponut worked on anon's junk? The whole idea for the "scat" scene (Going to spoiler this so if you don't want to read it, you don't have to, but it's a small explanation for the "scat" scene) came to me as a form of humiliation and that Rarity didn't consume any of the droppings. I guess just having to have licked at the droppings to clean off any semen was enough to upset some people and I suppose I should have driven home the point that she didn't actually eat any of it.

I don't partake in scat, diaper, fart, watersports, or foot fetishes. It's more realistic that I could, could end up liking feet in such a manner, but the rest of them just make my stomach a bit queasy.

>>25954065
Not that anon, but are we calling anything we don't agree with bait these days or are just not allowed to have a differing opinion.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 18:23:54 No.25955241 Report

Quoted By: >>25955388 >>25956183 >>25975726

>>25953355
>>25954065
I really don't feel like this is even bait these days.

I used to impatiently wait for season 2 episodes, and was disappointed like everyone else when they skipped a week or two. Contrast to later seasons, and especially season 5, where I'm often several episodes behind and watch them more out of a sense of duty than interest.

Part of it is that the magic wore off, part of it is community drama, and I think part of it is an actual drop in show quality, but I know there's lots of people in this mindset now, sticking around largely because of the community.

>>25954312
>>25953026
I'm not a writer, but I feel like there is a big difference between doing a sidestory/crossover and a continuation. I think in either case though, it's a good courtesy to ask the author first, especially for a continuation.

In the case of MrN, he seemed to be pretty cool about side stories at minimum, and I don't remember but fairly sure he was cool with Fall of the Moon (which is basically a time skipped continuation treated as a non-canon sidestory).

I think at this point a time skipped continuation might be ok, but I don't think it's what people in the thread really want. Be better off to just write another sidestory within the SiM universe at that point.

A straight up "leaving off where the author stopped" continuation though is a bit of a different story and I'm with Olibird on that one.

>>25954312
>ERA and Vhatty
I think those wounds are long since healed. Basic story is ERA had some hard core Ayn Rand politics, got drunk, and started arguing them. Him and Vhatty got into a huge shitpost war that literally spanned multiple threads. Afterwards ERA tried to drop and continue his story but people wouldn't let him and eventually he left. Vhatty was also kinda salty about his stuff not getting as much attention at MrN and others (which was probably true), and he also left shortly after. Least that was my impression from the thing.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 18:41:18 No.25955388 Report

Quoted By: >>25955648 >>25955706 >>25957777

>>25955241
I was around when that went down, but I thought it was something recent like a new writefag tried doing a story here and got chased out.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 19:06:28 No.25955648 Report

Quoted By: >>25957405 >>25957777

>>25955388
The only thing I remember like that was someone showed up and tried to do something with Escapades story and didn't ask or even label it as such. Escapade was surprisingly cool about it but it still turned into a mini shitstrom.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 19:11:58 No.25955706 Report

Quoted By: >>25958078

>>25955388
I don't remember anyone getting legit chased out, but there's probably been cases of people getting lukewarm response and/or serious criticism and disappearing.

This thread can have high standards, and what would be good green in some generals gets ripped apart here. That probably has chased away a few.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 20:06:54 No.25956183 Report

Quoted By: >>25957594

>>25955241
>a time skipped continuation might be ok
That's pretty much what all but one of Escapade's stories are.

Here's the issue I see with simply a timeskipped continuation: The great appeal of SiM was just how unstable everyone's position is. Anon (at least until the Twilight fiasco) was constantly faced with the very real possibility that Nightmare would kill him if he screwed up even once.
On top of that, there was the fact that Equestria was in shambles, the changelings were threatening war, and who knows if the fledgling empire will still be there tomorrow, or if the rebellion will storm the place? Hell, Anon, with one yank of a chain, could have ended Nightmare's reign...but he didn’t.

Skipping ahead removes that instability. All you're left with is the bondage >rape scenario, or AnoNMM waifu stories which...why would we want to keep using the SiM setting for that? I’m not trying to insult the stories we have, because seriously. Mastermind, Hawkeye, Escapade, Beran? You guys fucking rock, you managed to breath real life into a setting which very easily could have gone stale the day Nameless left.

So how do we get the instability back, if at all? Bring back a villain from the show? Alright, how do you keep the bondage-rape aspect still prominent? If it’s just abusing the villain, then again, why use the SiM setting?
I’m not trying to be an asshole, I’m genuinely curious. Almost every "big" story idea I come up with for the SiM setting could be told better, and be more accessible to new readers, if I drop the setting.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 21:43:18 No.25957088 Report

Quoted By: >>25957103 >>25958844

>>25947943

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 21:44:40 No.25957103 Report

Quoted By:

>>25957088
Very nice.

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Fri 01 Jan 2016 22:11:12 No.25957405 Report

Quoted By: >>25957468 >>25957610 >>25967971 >>25975553 >>25976020

Figured I'll trip this.

>>25951884
>The fact that there's STILL a Slave Pone general separate from this one shows that we have a serious issue.
I don't entirely agree. Most of those stories are feel-good, "Anon buys a slave and treats them well" stories. Very little D/s. I'm not sure they'd fly too well in this thread.

>Continuing SiM.
I don't believe there is something /inherently/ wrong with continuing a story after the author disappeared, so long as it's made /very/ clear it's not the same person, and it's not official. With that said, it's a touchy subject, ad should be approached carefully.

Realistically, I don't think it's a bold statement to say that I'm the primary candidate for continuing SiM. While I've entertained the idea briefly, I've never given it serious consideration. I'd probably want some sort of permission from MrN to do it. If he wants to trip a post here and off-hand that permission, I'd take a longer look at it.

>Reputation.
I've said this before. SiM is a gift and a curse at this point. Because so many of the stories here use that universe as a basis, there is a massive amount of pre-reading required to understand the new stories. Realistically 95% of my stories don't make sense to "new" visitors. That's a problem for gaining new readers.

>Standards.
This is a problem. The thread has a habit of crushing topics they don't like. NTR, Femdom, soft-dom, etc. It limits variety of stories we get.

>High Quality.
A massive issue. Writing in SiM is difficult for new writers, and even older ones. Since the standard demanded is so high, these stories take more work than normal. Once their published, new writers get no real feedback.

SiM has a very poor "time invested > Comments Received" ratio for non-CYOA stories. That kills motivation.

>>25955648
For me, this is a "what not-to-do" story. He didn't ask permission, AND he didn't have a disclaimer.

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Fri 01 Jan 2016 22:15:31 No.25957468 Report

Quoted By: >>25976020

>>25957405
>CYOAs.

Speaking of CYOAs, I've been thinking about starting one, but have been bad at thinking about topics. Anyone got suggestions for CYOAs?

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 22:24:55 No.25957594 Report

Quoted By:

>>25956183
Everything I would have said, said better. Focusing so heavily on the setting - and especially the absurd amount of NMMwaifuism that goes around - is a detriment, in my opinion.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 22:26:34 No.25957610 Report

Quoted By:

>>25957405
>If he wants to trip a post here and off-hand that permission, I'd take a longer look at it.
>Trying to trick MrN into posting here with a trip and causing a shitstorm.
If only it was this easy.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 22:40:34 No.25957777 Report

Quoted By: >>25958078 >>25967951

>>25955388
Hmm, I don't remember this.

I vaguely remember >>25955648 but that was short lived.

Azenanon got a lot of hate early on but stuck around for a while until vanishing.

Somewritefag got a lot of hate from one anon cause of the gay stuff, but he got a lot of good response too and stuck around for awhile. He ended up getting neck deep in some other story he was working on and vanished.

JohnColt got a bit if hate cause of his story setup, but again, he also got a lot of positive and stuck around until suddenly disappearing.

Everyone else I think just burned out, got little feedback, or lost interes. I don't remember anyone getting told to GTFO with any seriousness.

>SiM setting
I find it weird that this keeps coming up because BB and Olibirds stuff is set elsewhere. What we lack is a non-SiM shared universe, but writers seem to have no problem coming up with their own. Escapade and recently Hawkeye are the only ones really actively using the SiM universe any more.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 01 Jan 2016 23:08:34 No.25958078 Report

Quoted By: >>25975726

>>25955706
>>25957777
checking those quads

There was that one newbie writefag who started writing a ow the edge story, full of gore and grimdark he got BTFO and told to leave after half a thread

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 00:19:18 No.25958844 Report

Quoted By: >>25959042 >>25967725

>>25957088

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 00:34:35 No.25959019 Report

Quoted By:

>>25951823
Loving the story and glad to see you back!

I first found this general after reading your story from the herding threads rip so I feel I've got too thank you for leading me to this horrible wonderful place.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 00:36:43 No.25959042 Report

Quoted By: >>25961390

>>25958844
...I would do so many awful things to them.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 02:19:51 No.25960352 Report

Quoted By:

I see what you mean about the slave general being a softer kinder box.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 03:40:13 No.25961390 Report

Quoted By:

>>25959042
What kind of things senpai?
I'd tease them as they actually went about doing house chores.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 05:32:22 No.25962697 Report

Quoted By: >>25963980

The only good part of this comic bamp.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 07:25:40 No.25963980 Report

Quoted By:

>>25962697
That maw shot of chrysalis is pretty good desu senpai

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 09:52:31 No.25965086 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 12:40:27 No.25965626 Report

Quoted By: >>25965632

>You are Anon.
>Opening your eyes, for what feels like the first time, you reach up instinctually to touch your pounding head.
>As you try to move, you realize your body is incredibly stiff and resists the motion.
>Upon scanning the room, you realize you are locked inside a holding cell.
>A conversion catches your attention.
>Wait, no, an argument.
>"Why can't you get it through your thick skull that we should study this creature? He could prove to be a valuable asset," one voice booms.
>Definitely an argument.
>"I've seen his kind before, Doc," another voice chimes. "Believe me, the only thing special about them is their opposable thumbs."
>"Well General, did you ever think that understanding their anatomy more thoroughly could make advances in robotics?" Doc grumbles in retort. "It could even help create more realistic prosthetics or we could discover something about humans that make them special."
>Two stallions emerge from down the hall, entering the room, and stopping right in front of your cell.
>One is draped in a white lab coat while the other dons a wide breastplate.
>Were they the ones talking?
>As soon as the thought occurs, you realize how idiotic that sounds.
>Unless you're dreaming. Then everything would make perfect sense.
>"So why did you make me bring you to it?" the General asks.
>"Just to get some preliminary observations," Doc responds. "I've never seen a human in the flesh. Books and documents can only tell you so much with so few having been recorded in Equestria."
>"What is your angle, Doc?" the General presses, turning to his peer.
>Doc turned in response, wearing a face of mock surprise, "Why, whatever do you mean?"
>"Your attempts to convince me to donate it to your department seem desperate at best," the intimidating stallion growls. "What is it you actually wish to do with... this specimen."
>Doc grins. "Isn't it obvious?"
>The General squints his eyes for a moment before responding, "Enlighten me."

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 12:42:40 No.25965632 Report

Quoted By: >>25965692 >>25965693 >>25965717

>>25965626

>"Tell me," Doc begins, pacing towards the opposite side of the room. "If a human magically appeared in the sky and crashed on Equestrian soil, what would you think?"
>The General raises an eyebrow. "It's an anomaly. Every other human has just... appeared one day trying to interact with citizens, sometimes violently so."
>"Exactly, this is the first human we've recorded and had video footage of appearing in Equestria. Not to mention it's only been two years since the last human appeared. This is a huge outlier relative to our pretty consistent ten year average."
>"It's strange, but I fail to see your point."
>"I see it as being a possibility for an invasion of some sort. The previous humans could have been scouts or sleeper agents, planting themselves in society only to uproot it when we least expect it!"
>"Well, it's a possibility we've always considered," the General answers straight faced. "We've always monitored the humans that have entered Equestria. None have done anything without knowledge. None have disappeared spontaneously or exuded magic. We've even watched some until they've passed of old age. None of the humans have seemed militant and I wouldn't invade a location I had no intelligence on. It'd be like sending your armies to the moon."
>Doc stops pacing and begins staring at the General. He sighs, "Looks like I really can't change your mind on this."
>Doc turns to face you and the General follows suit.
>"So what are you going to do with it?" Doc questions in an unusually calm voice.
>"We'll interview it, implant a chip, and sell it like the others."
>With that, the General turns and exits the room. Doc is quickly catches up to him.
>"Your department could use some new uniforms," he snorts.

Continue? 2/6

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 13:02:26 No.25965692 Report

Quoted By:

>>25965632
You have my attention. Please continue.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 13:03:08 No.25965693 Report

Quoted By: >>25965760

>>25965632
If it's 2/6 post the whole thing. Giving critiques of something this short is meaningless, and would likely be useless vitriol or headpatting.

Post more for actual feedback.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 13:14:24 No.25965717 Report

Quoted By: >>25965721

>>25965632

>After they leave, you are finally left with your thoughts.
>Surely a dream would have you in a more active role and not stuck in this cage.
>You can't even remember how you got here.
>The last thing you remember is sitting alone in the dark, dreading what the future had in store for you.
>You had then gone to bed to sleep it off and hopefully feel better in the morning.
>To your amazement, you're now here.
>Slowly, the vivid ice cold floor and smell of chemicals makes you believe you're not dreaming.
>Your migraine and body aches agree, this is very real.
>The sensation of two prongs pressing into your neck catch your attention.
>It feels like some sort of collar but the prongs scared you for a moment.
>There is a plastic box sitting right where the prongs are.
>A shock collar, perhaps?
>Besides the cold, hard floor, your holding cell has a bed and a toilet.
>The bed can't be any harder than the floor.
>Or any colder.
>When you try and stand up, you recoil suddenly, remembering your joints are extremely stiff.
>It felt as if you hadn't moved in weeks.
>You slowly ease your legs out in front of you, pulling back slightly each time you feel pain.
>Eventually, you manage to fight through the stiffness and your legs feel operable.
>Time to try standing again.
"Using the bed would probably be a good idea," you tell yourself.
>As you rise, you stumble slightly but catch yourself on the bed.
"Good idea, me," you mumble.
>Huh, didn't know it would feel so nice to be standing again.
>Pacing around your cell, your body feels more flexible as you begin using your joints again.
>Glancing at the toilet again, you decide to relieve yourself.
>Amazing, even better than walking.
>Despite the fact you had just woken up, you feel exhausted.
>The bed stares at you longingly. You share the same look in return.
"Can't be any harder than the floor."
>Lying down, you can't help but wander in the realm of denial.

3/6?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 13:16:23 No.25965721 Report

Quoted By: >>25965724

>>25965717

>This can't be real life can it?
>There are talking horses for fuck's sake.
>The sand man manages to find you though, even in this strange place.

>The sound of clanking startles you awake.
>The cell bars remind you this isn't a dream.
>Something else quickly grabs your attention.
>A pony with soft features standing outside of your cell, picks up a clipboard and begins writing something.
"Who are you?" you ask in a hoarse, tired voice. It's almost inaudible.
>Feeling embarrassed to yourself, you clear your throat.
>She jumps slightly, bumping the cart and sending objects sliding across the surface.
>Once she regains her composure, she says, "Oh, you startled me."
"Who are you?" you repeat.
>"I'm just here to check your vitals, get some basic information, and double check you've made a full recovery," she replies, her attention returning to the clipboard.
"Full recovery from what?" you ask, perplexed.
>The other ponies said you fell from the sky. Surely that would have killed you so what really happened?
>"I'm not surprised you don't remember," she answers making a check on the clipboard. "You fell from the sky."
>You lean your head forward in disbelief.
"The sky?" you stammer.
>"W-well, more like a couple meters," she stutters. "But still, you had a concussion and a few cracked ribs."
>That sounded more reasonable.
"How long have I been here?"
>She tilts her head, thinking a moment before responding. "You've been in your cell a good sixteen hours. Equestria? More like sixteen days."
>So much time had passed and you hadn't even been a part of it.
>Who knows how long it was from your last memory to falling here in... Equestria.
>"I need to ask you some basic questions now," she says slowly, looking over her clipboard.
"Okay," you manage to spit out.
>"How old are you?"
"Twenty two."
>"What's the last thing you remember?"
>Considering suicide a pretty viable option.
"Staring at my computer screen."

4/6?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 13:18:02 No.25965724 Report

Quoted By: >>25965731

>>25965721

"It's a machine," you begin slowly, unsure how to concisely describe it. "You use it to play games and talk to people who aren't nearby."
>She raises an eyebrow and begins writing on her clipboard.
>"What country did you live in?"
"The United States."
>She finishes writing on her clipboard, "That's everything we'll need for now."
>Really? She never asked your name.
>"I'm going to do a check up on you," she says approaching the door to your cell.
>Unlocking it, she steps inside, pulling the cart along with her.
>You stand up and begin walking towards her.
>She jumps again but quickly turns and holds out a radio device in front of her.
>All your muscles from your neck up to your jaw and down to your chest start seizing.
>You fall to your knees in pain.
>"There is no need to be irrational," she growls.
>The mare stabs something into the back of your neck.
>With your nerves shot, you can't identify the object.
>"Well, I was going to do this after the numbing shot, but may as well implant the chip now."
>It almost sounded like she thought she was being humane.
>Yeah, whatever makes you sleep better at night, bitch.
>She straps something to your arm and cuts off blood flow. Must be looking for your pulse.
>"Well that covers our checklist," she exclaims almost happily. "Time to give you your shot and get you sold." She sticks another shot into your neck.
>Sold?
>You heard it before but what that specifically entailed, you weren't sure.
>The shot's effect hits and you don't have time to figure out its effects before you're unconscious.

5/6?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 13:19:37 No.25965731 Report

Quoted By: >>25965742

>>25965724

>A soft vision plays before you, like an old video.
>The faded, bright colors were warm.
>It was strange how tactile it all seemed, even though you knew immediately it was a dream.
>You're standing in the doorway of your house, looking down a hallway straight into your backyard. There's a doorway to the left and stairs leading to your on the right of your of the scene.
>It feels surreal and the sensation to reach out and touch it swallows all other thoughts.
>As you do, your sister turns a corner walking away but turns her head momentarily and notices you.
>"Nonny, what are you doing back so soon?" she says, giving you her usual beaming smile.
>You return her smile weakly.
"How could I leave behind my baby sister?" you reply softly.
>She chuckles a bit at your statement. "Are you okay Nonny?"
"No," you say honestly. "I miss you. I shouldn't have left."
>What were you saying?
>She walks over and hugs you with unexpected force.
>"I miss you too Nonny. I miss so much."
>No.
"Don't say that... Please... Just forget."
>"I'll never forget my forget my favorite Nonny."
>No, this is only a dream. None of this is real.
>She can't miss you. She just can't.
>You could never forgive yourself.

6/7

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 13:22:07 No.25965742 Report

Quoted By: >>25965999 >>25976535

>>25965731

>Your head slamming on metal awakes you from your horribly pleasant nightmare.
>Memories are the worst. They trickle such sweet dreams over your conscience while you sleep.
>You become aware of the scene and bury those feelings where they belong.
>At least you weren't in that fucking jail cell.
>It felt like the room was moving.
>The heat was sweltering and the darkness revealed nothing about what was going on.
>The last thing you can recall is the notion that you would be sold.
>You began to let your mind wander.
>Slavery wasn't an unfamiliar topic.
>History mentioned it a few times.
>Sometimes it wasn't even necessarily called slavery.
>Indentured servitude for some.
>Thinking about it, the scale of the enslaved affected what the title was.
>Large scale forced labor was slavery for world wonders or sometimes carrying an economy.
>If it's just one person with a few slaves, then it's more often called indentured servitude.
>Letting your mind ramble on was nice. It helped keep your emotions numb to what all of this meant for you.
>The vehicle eventually rolls to a stop and the backdoors open.
>You're pulled from the truck and tossed down onto the ground.
>The blinding sunlight makes it difficult to discern your whereabouts.
>If it wasn't pitch black, it had to be pure white.
>You stumbled to your knees, feeling chains limit your mobility.
>After a second you realized there were cuffs on your
>As your eyes become accustomed, you see yourself on a large dirt lot.
>Colorful ponies stand in various locations.
>Other more faded ponies are locked in chains, walking in lines or crowding into rooms.
>"Get up," snarls a gruff male voice. You feel a hard hit you in the back, knocking you over.
>Bastard.
>"Did you hear me?" he growled again. "I said get up!"
>He kicked again, hitting squarely in the side of your lower ribs.
>You stumbled to your feet as quickly as possible to avoid taking another hit.

7/7

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 13:26:03 No.25965760 Report

Quoted By: >>25976535

>>25965693

Really, I was just looking to see if anyone was interested in the premise I had set up.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 14:27:24 No.25965999 Report

Quoted By:

>>25965742
Not a big fan of Anon-sub, but the writing is good enough to keep me reading anyway.

Going forward I'd like to see Anon do more things, rather just witness stuff happening around/to him. So far he's kinda like Mad Max in Fury Road, if you saw that movie and know what I mean.

Also whoever is going to be anon's owner should be introduced soon, so far we've seen four other characters (Nurse, Doc, General and Anon's sister) of which I assume only the memories of his sister are going to be relevant in the future.

I really liked the parts where anon was talking to himself, and the part after the nurse opened the holding cell, showing how ponies threat and feel about humans was much better than flat out telling us exposition on how often humans arrive. I definitely wouldn't mind seeing more of that nurse in the future.

The parts that didn't wok were the Doc and General talking and the part where Anon was discussing the semantics of slavery and indentured servitude. I understand what you were going for, but it felt really forced. Would slavery really be the thing he would be thinking about when he's tying to avoid thinking about him being a slave?

Overall, you did a good job, though, and I would like to see more.

If you are taking suggestions, on who should become Anon's owner, Id definitely like to see one of the canon characters instead of some OC. How about Princess Luna? Anon certainly has a dream thing going on. Princess Celestia would work too.

Also, get a name, tripcode and pastebin.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 17:27:14 No.25967046 Report

Quoted By:

>read later bamp

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1057466.png, 435KiB, 900x794

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 18:47:50 No.25967725 Report

Quoted By: >>25970484

>>25958844

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Sat 02 Jan 2016 19:13:19 No.25967951 Report

Quoted By:

>>25957777
>SiM Universe isn't that popular.
I agree that SiM has a minority of the writers. However, for a while, in terms of shear volume, it took the majority of the thread's green. To be plain, up until recently, I was probably the most active writer, and most of my works were in SiM. That's probably where that perception came from to begin with.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 19:15:31 No.25967971 Report

Quoted By: >>25968408

>>25957405
Wait shit was that guy me? I wrote the story about Luna yelling at Celestia for feeling her aura touching her moon.

And I drew on your stories as well as a few others for inspiration.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 19:41:27 No.25968193 Report

Quoted By:

Just got done with my GRE and I'm gonna drink this headache away bump

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j

Escapade !!4eiZF7gVx4j Sat 02 Jan 2016 20:00:37 No.25968408 Report

Quoted By: >>25969388

>>25967971
No. I actually remember that exchange about "how dare you touch /her/ moon?" I enjoyed it a lot, and it's been an untouched part of my Headcanon, so seeing someone else with it was exciting. I'm normally don't take issues with people referring to my work. That's what I did with MrN after all.

The story in question was a F grade continuation of RichAnon. Extraordinarily poor quality, and missed the concept of the story entirely.

If you don't mind, what story was that "my moon" line from? I've been wanting to read it, but I forgot the name.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 21:27:46 No.25969388 Report

Quoted By: >>25973940

>>25968408
Oh um. Awesome. Phew. Also that sounds awful...
The My Moon? I honestly just went with it. It seemed like something she would say. I never actually pastebin'd the story. I just remember it was thread 67, in case I ever became prolific enough that I'd want to throw it in.

I don't know if it came from any particular story, just the tone drove me to that way of saying it.

I remember going overboard with the ye olde speak. Was a little daunting haha

I'm not prolific enough.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 823629.png, 172KiB, 1280x853

Anonymous Sat 02 Jan 2016 23:21:36 No.25970484 Report

Quoted By:

>>25967725

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 01:11:18 No.25971573 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 02:58:25 No.25972703 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 02:58:58 No.25972719 Report

Quoted By:

Almost caught up. I read up on the archived threads, and am 25% of the way through this one, too.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 04:29:59 No.25973940 Report

Quoted By:

>>25969388
>in case I ever became prolific enough that I'd want to throw it in.
Everyone's got to start somewhere, Anon. Pastebin it!

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 04:51:27 No.25974189 Report

Quoted By:

>>25804282
It's an interesting flavour of sadism.

The post-cheating backstory gives good context, and enough of a justification for the current open affair, given a person who's just gone through a betrayal like that.

>>25804238
>“How was the bouquet today?"
Pretty sure you meant Boutique.

>>25808827
>>Your guest nods, her eyes the size of dinner plates.
>>...You think anyway. It’s been a long time since you’ve had dishes of any kind.
Like that clay bowl he's got back at the cave right now.

>>25808827
>an unguarded source of obsidian around here
Obsidian is just any lava that cooled too quickly to form crystals, so it appear glassy.

Just find an exposed lava trench that tartarus uses for lighting, and scoop out a glob with one of your sticks so you can move it to an accessible location for it to dry. You can do it with probably nothing more than some mild first degree burns if you move quick.

You'll get better results if you pick lava that flows better. That's one way you can tell you're working with a Mafic lava flow. Put simply, the lava with a lower viscosity releases it's gases faster, so what you get is going to be more like glass than pumice (which is actually just glass with a ton of bubbles in it on a microscopic level).

Think of the difference between an explosive eruption (no mafic chemistry), and a volcano that just kind of oozez lava like on hawaii (mafic chemistry).

>>25808837
Regarding the "restraining the person who has to watch something they don't like" idea.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ZdGbyOlRxs Spoilers for Unlimited Blade Works.

>>25839183
Agreed. That was the last big change the story had, if I remember right.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 05:58:49 No.25974956 Report

Quoted By:

>>25860913
>My idea so far is that Anon got those power either by founding some kind of magical item or by winning a bet against Discord.
>Anon got those power
>By founding some kind of item

>>25860968
>I already tough about some limitation he's going to have.
>Except my around midnight.

Get an editor. If this is an indication of the level of English that you have, then it needs to have a proofreading pass done by one or two native speakers.

>>25865190
>>25866833
>Chinese water torture on Luna
I could see it

>>25870449
You have your Chessmaster!Anon and your Cuddle!Anon, why not have a story with a Sadist!Anon? Even once.

Everything else is indirect, with anything rougher than a few slaps or whip hits seems to trigger the delicate sensibilities of the thread. We have enough indirect mind manipulation in the story archives to make a little bit of room for DoomGuy!Anon to rip and tear his way through a few problems.

Even when we had the imaginary dream sequence with Celestia way back when. Even when Gilda was center stage and things were well on the way. If it is allowed for fictional characters to be put into a smut setting, then it is reasonable for these same characters to have no special protections from being put into a violent setting, especially when the narrative justifies it.

Edge is badly done violence and meanness. Torture doesn't mean edge.

>>25871148
>rapetrain story.
It started off pretty uninspired and pointless, but that story grew over time into a more character and setting-driven plot. Very much like how Nameless' story grew from a setup that seems pretty crappy and limiting in retrospect, but got really interesting later on.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:25:14 No.25975169 Report

Quoted By: >>25975182

"Twilight, we've been over this. I don't *want* a marefriend."
>She just narrows her eyes a little more and smiles.
>"A stallionfriend then? There's nothing wrong with that, you know."
>You'd facepalm if this entire topic wasn't far beyond worn out by this point.
"I just don't want anyone- anypony, Twi. That's all."
>"Anon."
>She shakes her head.
>"You know I can't accept that. Everypony belongs with somepony."
>You narrow your eyes to match her's.
"Not me. And you really shouldn't end those words with 'pony' when you're including me. I'm not a pony, Twilight. You should be able to tell."
>Twilight seems to think for a second.
>"Yeah...I guess you're not, huh?"

********

>"Anon! Good news!"
>She comes barreling through your bedroom door.
>Her tone of voice is somehow as detached as it is cheerful.
>Meddling weirdo or not, she set you up with a lot of things here.
>A house. A job. A tailor who doesn't mind working with non-pony types.
>And of course, that little phone she built that can somehow call the human world.
>Well, your human world. They have another one here, somehow, but it's not the one you came from.
>Everyone there is all...multicolored and proportioned funny.
>Hell, when you fell outta the sky into Twi's house, she thought you were a human from that world - but with some kind of deformity.
>Not a great first impression for either of you.
>But, still, you owe the weirdo a lot.
>Despite how standoffish yesterday got with her damn attempts to set you up...you can still share some nice moments with her.
"Oh? What happened?"
>"I've been thinking about what happened yesterday, and I wanted to apologize."

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:27:19 No.25975182 Report

Quoted By: >>25975195

>>25975169
>That lifts your spirits.
"Yeah, you got a little pushy..."
>She cuts you off.
>"See, I realized - the reason your libido is so low is because, since you're the only one of your species around, we're not showing interest in you the right way."
"I. Um, what, Twi?"
>She giggles and smiles one of those dumb horse smiles of hers.
>"You know, every species has its own courtship rituals. Its own way of signaling a desire to mate, and what times of the year and stuff."
>Well, it's not like she's wrong, but...
"Twi, that's not really what the-"
>"So I built another one of those phones to your world, and called a few of you."
>She what.
"You what?"
>"Pushed numbers at random until I called a human male willing to talk about the sex stuff you guys do, and how it works and all that."
"Oh my god, Twi, who the hell did you bother with this crap?"
>She looks confused.
>"'Who the'-"
>And then she doesn't.
>"Oh! Right! Hell is what you guys have instead of Tartarus! I forgot for a second cause I'm so excited. Anyway, the human said his name was 'Neckbeard'. I think he might know you since he said you 'should know what that means'."
>She did little air quotes with her front hooves there.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:28:32 No.25975195 Report

Quoted By: >>25975215

>>25975182

>oh yeah, you know what that means
>some dateless loser on the internet - one who apparently wanted you and Twi to KNOW he was a dateless loser on the internet - set up Twi for some crazy bullshit you're gonna have to talk her out of.
>You almost don't wanna ask.
>But you're not gonna slam the door in the face of your dumbass friend, dumbass though she may be.
>So you dryly choke the words out.
"And what did he say?"
>"This might get a little obscene-"
>She steps forward, closing the door behind her.
>"-we don't need anypony- oh, I'm sorry! - anyBODY hearing this stuff."
>You'd remind her you're both already in a private residence with no one inside but the two of you - but she's done this before.
>Little nerd is just that shy apparently.
"Anyway, Neckbeard told me all about the sex games you humans play."
>The what.
"The what?"
>"Oh, he said there were other names for them. Like 'porn games' and 'hentai games'."
>Oh sweet god.
>You can practically smell the tentacles in the air.
>"And he talked about of lot of other things too, once I told him about how you were acting. Like how the females always take charge with your kind of human, and you guys don't really have-"
>She makes those air quotes again.
>"-'consent'."

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:29:23 No.25975204 Report

Quoted By:

Oh I thought the title meant "submission in this thread is mandatory." What a hi-larious misunderstanding.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:30:32 No.25975215 Report

Quoted By: >>25975258

>>25975195

>Your eyes widen, and you suddenly know what it's like to do a spit take without actually drinking anything.
"Whoa whoa hold on, that's-"
>She silences you with a wave.
>"Yeah, he talked about how you guys' social rules said the males aren't even supposed to acknowledge sex stuff, so you'd deny it up and down."
>oh that prick thought of everything, didn't he?
>"He talked about a lot of other stuff too, like something called 'cucking', but I didn't really believe him there. He kept laughing. And what kind of species wants to be cheated on?"
>You felt your fucking hair stand on end when that word came out.
>But at least Twilight has enough sense to have not fallen for that.
>Like this needs to be any more awkward.
>"But anyway, I took care of everything."
>...somehow...that's a terrifying sentence.
>You steel yourself.
"Twilight. What exactly does that mean you did?"
>She blushes.
>Put a hoof behind her head.
>"Well, I mean, it was a little awkward, but-"
>oh good god no
>"I called a town meeting - most of the mares in town showed up - I guess a few were too busy to make it something so last-minute - and told them all what they need to do if they're interested in you."
>you feel your face contort into some horrible, nightmarish expression
>Purpleautism doesn't seem to pick up on your displeasure.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:30:50 No.25975219 Report

Quoted By: >>25975252

>>25920423
Fleur seems to be getting ideas beyond her station, in how she can force other ponies / pets of Anonymous to act. The pets are among the lowest of the low, but they're answerable only to Anon. This is less a guidance role and more an abuse of power that's borderline unacceptable at best.

Plus the implied bits of intra-pet shipping are not good.

>>25925603
>Lyra's characterization. She was kidnapped, imprisoned, publicly molested, and traumatized by Fleur.... yet in this section she seems flippant around her, almost eager at times.
She's been tricked into putting all the blame for the situation on BonBon, since she sees that Fleur really wasn't the one who got to choose what happened. She was just following orders. It was BonBon who went and made things into a problem.

>>25951659
>>25951591
>reputation as 'edgelord general' isn't doing us any favors
I've been in the thread for a while.. Anything that is remotely associated with what might potentially become edge if mishandled is flamed by people who insist that things only be done with a softer hand. I can't remember any real edge story we've had. There have been odd instances of dipping into violence, like the Gilda scene, but the borderline hugboxers in the thread spam negativity so much when that happens that the writers are afraid to dip into that well for a long time afterwards.

Without exception, everyone I've seen who's actually looked into the stories has seen that the reputation is absurdly exaggerated at best. I've seen more actual grimdark edgy rape in the Reverse Gender Roles general and in AiE than I have over here, to be honest.

It's just like the tumblrtards that think the fandom is evil itself, when every story they've got that points to that has been debunked dozens of times, and only seems to come from personality-disordered mental patients.

The only story theme for this thread that separates it is bossing people around in a sometimes mean way. Everything else is mirrored.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:33:39 No.25975252 Report

Quoted By:

>>25975219
No no no no no anyone who says this place is too fucking edgy can go slit their own throats on an altar to Satan while listening to death metal. You keep doing what you're doing and let these fucking softies go home if they don't like it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:34:19 No.25975258 Report

Quoted By: >>25975268

>>25975215

>"So I really was doing the wrong thing all along by telling you to find a marefriend, Anon. I'm sorry."
>She...she actually looks apologetic...
>"I had no idea that with guys the females did all the finding. Well, 'finding'."
>Those damn air quotes again.
>This time they kinda make your stomach turn, and your dick scream in horror.
>But Twilight just looks amused.
>No, that smile is more than that.
>Her eyes are closed in smugness.
>She's *proud* of her turn of phrase.
>"Aaaanyway, you can rest assured if there's any mare in Ponyville who's interested in you, she'll give you a 'gameover' before you even know what hit you!"
>You actually take a step back.
>This is horrifying.
>This is too surreal to possibly be happening.
>Did she...
>Did she seriously tell every mare in town they should just fucking *rape* you if they wanna?
>Well, almost every mare.
>Still.
"Tw--Twilight, you can't seriously-"
>She interrupts you again.
>Fucking master of being polite in a social situation she is.
>"Me? Oh, geez, Anon, I was hoping that wasn't coming."
>She steps forward and puts a hoof on your hip.
>"I'm just not interested in you like that. I'm sorry if that hurts, really."
>...You have no fucking clue where to begin.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:35:33 No.25975268 Report

Quoted By: >>25975280

>>25975258

>So you kinda don't.
>Instead you scramble for words for a bit.
>That is to say, for what must be too long, because Twi interprets the silence as an awkward, 'unrequited love' thing.
>"I...I'm sorry. I'll just let myself out."
>She backs towards your front door.
>...which hides a town-full of possible rapists who have the go-ahead to do as they want with you, just beyond it.
>Jesus, is this what tumblrina feminists think Earth is like?
>You take a tentative shuffle towards Twi.
>But you still can't make words come out.
>"Take all the time you need to get over me, Anon. I understand. I've been friendzoned too."
>She opens that now-suddenly-intimidating door.
>"But hey, there's good news, right? Every pony in Ponyville knows the proper way to approach you now! So when you do get over me and join us all out here again, you've got a real human experience waiting for you!"
>No no no.
>no no no no no no no no
>"Just focus on how much fun that'll be, okay?"
>She smiles an actually-warm smile-
>"Bye, Anon!"
>-and closes your door behind her.
>...You're not sure you wanna open that door right now.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:36:34 No.25975280 Report

Quoted By: >>25975308

>>25975268
This next chunk was written by anon other than me.

>Day 14
>Your windows are boarded up with dismantled furniture parts
>Your door is blocked by several chairs, a couch
>They had cut off your electricity to starve you out
>That, or because you stopped paying
>You light a match
>And set the candle alight
>6 matches remain
>30 candles remain
>You really should have prepared better for this apocalypse
>The sun is down
>And the pale moonlight filters through the gaps of your windows
>The tap still works, but you feel a little weak from the rationing
>Your supplies were only meant to last you a week
>2 cans of food remain
>All the perishables have long since expired
>The future is looking bleak
>The only comfort you have is your journal
>And you write down the happenings of the day
>"Day 14. Low on food. Water still works. Low on matches."
>The several entries before are equally bleak
>But this way, if someone finds your body, they'll know what happened
>Will it really end this way?
>It seemed almost like an eternity since Twilight sent her missive out
>And now the ravenous ponies of the world seek to take your chastity
>You shudder at the thought of their glistening marehoods, wrapping around your virgin member
>Flanks squeezing your thighs, hooves pushing your shoulders down
>You squeeze your eyes shut
>You can't let them get to you now
>They can't win

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:39:15 No.25975308 Report

Quoted By: >>25975330

>>25975280

>Day 20
>You write in your journal, the one part that keeps you sane
>"Day 20. No food (again). Water gone. Matches gone. Sun is setting. Heading out."
>Today was the day
>You needed to go out to forage for supplies
>You had prepared a sack of essential materials for you
>A crowbar
>A hammer
>A bag of bits
>A backpack for the haul
>A map
>A marker
>You check your gear
>Some gloves
>A padded sweatshirt for armor
>Thick jeans
>If they're going to try to get you, you're going to give them hell for it
>You slowly remove the piled furniture on your front door
>Breathing heavily
>Your senses are dulled, and you're fatigued easily from the lack of food
>The way is cleared
>You start prying the nails off the boards
>And then the door lays there
>Waiting
>Inviting you
>You take a deep breath
>And open the door

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:41:24 No.25975330 Report

Quoted By: >>25975373

>>25975308

>It creaks as you open it, and you look out
>Empty
>Clear
>Dark
>Crickets chirp
>The sun had gone down while you prepared
>And the moon now lit your way
>You heft your backpack
>And hold up your map
>There's a grocery store two blocks to the left
>Your eyes scan the streets
>No pony in sight
>Good
>So far so good
>You slowly make your way towards the grocery store
>Holding your crowbar, gripping it tightly
>You make it halfway through, and see the store in front of you, when you hear distant giggling
>You freeze
>Looking around
>And see shapes on the horizon, heading your way
>Shit
>Shit
>Instinct tells you to run, but the noise would attract attention
>You walk to the side of the street, finding a bush
>And slowly worm your way into it, hoping to avoid contact
>You drop your backpack into a nearby bush
>Freeing you up and giving you some more mobility
>And you lay in wait, while the shapes come near

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:45:47 No.25975373 Report

Quoted By: >>25975387

>>25975330

>There's 2 of them
>You recognize what used to be your friends
>Lyra, her once gentle smile now replaced by the psychopathic smirk of a rapist
>BonBon, a predatorial glint where her innocent eyes used to be
>You hold your breath as they pass
>And it looks like they would almost go by, with no incident
>Until one of them stops
>Your heart takes a leap
>Lyra sniffs the air
>Turning her head around
>And faces your direction
>Your fight or flight sense engages
>And you bolt away from the pair
>You run through bushes, hop fences, trying to keep a mental note of where you're going
>You hear their footsteps following you, bounding after you
>Shit
>You're going to get caught
>It's going to end here
>Everything you've done
>You breath heavily as you round the next fence
>A light from a window blinks on
>They're onto you
>You turn towards her
>And...
>Your backpack is still left behind
>You're defenseless
>Unarmed
>It's over
>Your body relaxes as you feel yourself making peace with your end
>You close your eyes as the rustling gets louder
>And the first of them jump on top of you

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:46:47 No.25975387 Report

Quoted By: >>25975400

>>25975373

>You collapse onto the ground, stomach first
>And feel her warm body on top of you
>Her muzzle is near your ear
>You feel her breaths as she exhales onto you
>"I've got him!"
>It's Lyra
>Oh, where did things go wrong
>You feel her get up slightly
>And she turns you over, back on the ground, with her magic
>You had made peace with it
>But now as rape stares you in the face
>You're unsure
>What happens afterwards?
>Is anyone really ever sure?
>Her ravenous eyes pierce your own
>She licks her lips
>"I found you, Anon."
>You gulp and see her partner walk out of the bushes
>A stern look on her face, frowning
>Bits of branch and leaves are stuck in her mane
>"Really? You ran all the way for this?"
>It's the typical good rapist/bad rapist shtick
>You can't let their psychological games get to you

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:47:57 No.25975400 Report

Quoted By: >>25975432

>>25975387

>"C'mon, I've been wanting this for a while."
>BonBon rolls her eyes
>"Just get it over with."
>No
>Even if she's the loving rapist that tells you she wanted to stop Lyra
>Even if she holds you afterwards, telling you that you're still clean, pure
>She's still a part of all this
>You won't fall for her
>Lyra's body grinds against you
>And her horn's magic works your pants, sliding it off
>This is it
>The ride ends here
>Your completely limp dick is exposed to the extremely cold air
>And the pony above you presses her warm lips down on you
>Sliding her wet slit across the tip of your erecting cock
>You don't want this
>But your body keeps telling you that this rubbing feels good
>It feels dirty, wrong, that you're doing this
>And you have to look away, closing your eyes
>"Aww, Anon, you don't want it, huh?"
>You feel her shifting, the slit sliding backwards
>Soon you feel her exhales on your ear
>Her muzzle is close when she whispers
>"Too bad."
>And she plops her soft, juicy, rapey marehood down onto you
>She takes your cock into her warm folds
>And you feel her inner walls squeeze and squeeze
>So you can't help but squirm at the touch
"N-no..."
>"Yes yes, Anon."
>You hear a sigh from BonBon, who's no doubt watching and getting off to this

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:50:59 No.25975432 Report

Quoted By: >>25975441

>>25975400

>Lyra thrusts her hips up and down on you
>Your cock can't help but get hard and it fills you with shame
>What if this was all your fault?
>Maybe if you had dressed differently
>Or walked differently
>You feel your tip press against hard resistance when she slams all the way down
>Your balls rub against her soft fur
>Suddenly, they tingle
>And you realize Lyra is using her magic to massage your balls
>Why is your body telling you it feels good?
>It's wrong, so wrong
>"C'mon, Anon."
>You feel soft hooves against your cheeks
>Spreading wetness
>You don't remember crying
>Wait
>Her hoof presses on your lips
>And it's not the salty taste of tears
>But the sweet honeyed taste of...
>Oh gods
>You retch
>And she pushes her hoof further in
>The monster giggles as she fiddles with your tongue
>Spreading her delicious - no, disgusting - juices all over your tongue
>Her moans crescendo
>And you feel her body shiver on top of you
>Her insides squeeze your cock, and the folds slide across your sensitive spots
>It's enough to coax you to edge
>As she keeps thrusting you realize you're about to actually cum
>And the idea fills you with so much shame you can't help but give a small whimper
>She gives out a loud gasp, and you feel warm liquids envelop your cock
>Which drives you also to climax, and you gasp into her hoof
>Filling the rapist up, giving her your life, your seed

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:52:00 No.25975441 Report

Quoted By: >>25975496

>>25975432

>She pops off with a squish
>And laughs
>"You came, Anon."
>Her hoof is freed from your mouth
>And you curl up into a ball after she gets off of you
>"Don't lie to yourself, you enjoyed it."
>Slut
>Whore
>That's all you are now
>"Can we go now?"
>"Sure you don't want a go, BonBon?"
>"Yes, I'm sure."
>Their footsteps recede into the distance
>And you're left there with cum stains on your cock
>Stains you know you can never fully clean yourself of
>You cry to sleep that night
>Hoping for a better tomorrow

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:57:24 No.25975495 Report

Quoted By:

THIS IS NOT M FETISH

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:57:50 No.25975496 Report

Quoted By: >>25975504

>>25975441
Me again.

********

>And you don't get it.
>But she does.
>And you think she might be trying to give you one too.
>Cause when you come to, Lyra's in your house, but...she's just cleaning up.
>"Oh hey! You're up! Good morning!"
>You make an inarticulate gurgle of fear as you feel the tingle of her magic on your head, pulling you up and-- laying you back down onto the cool side of the pillow.
>Huh.
>"You really let your place get dirty, Anon. And you're low on food and stuff, but- don't worry! -me and Bon Bon are taking care of it."
>Huh again.
>"We actually talked to Twilight about it. She's pretty sure it's that you guys get depressed without a mate."
>As you listen to the sounds of magic firing, and trashbags crinkling, and piles of this or that being cleaned up, you actually kind of manage to find the words, never mind your dry throat.
"Well, I mean, that's true, but-"
>You hear that damn front door creaking open.
>"Still more." comes the flat voice of Bon Bon.
>You sit up and watch as the earth pony drops a few cases of water from her back onto your floor, and then Lyra loads a bunch of burlap sacks filled with who-knows-what onto her.
>Well, it's probably trash.
>Probably.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 06:58:51 No.25975504 Report

Quoted By: >>25975514

>>25975496

>"Oh he's up." says the two-tone maned mare.
>Lyra smiles, "Yep! Our human coltfriend!"
>...oh that's what they think this is.
>wait. 'our'?
>You exhale, remembering they literally got told that what they did was not only normal and okay, but *precisely what you wanted*.
>Like this isn't okay, but...are they really 'evil'?
>Lyra cuts off your train of thought.
>"We did the human mating ritual, so we're, uh, Twi said...pears?"
>"Pair-bonded." responds Bon Bon, characteristically unamused.
>She walks out as this shit sinks into you a little further.
>You sit up on your own this time.
>Lyra smiles at you.
"Lyra, this isn't how that works."
>She frowns.
>"H...how what works?"
"Well, uh..."
>You massage your temple for a bit.
"I guess 'pair bonding'."
>She tilts her head, still looking distraught, and gently sets down a pile of your laundry she was sorting.
"We're not...you and me and Bon Bon aren't... like a...thing."
>She looks around the room, chewing on her lower lip.
>"Oh! Oh, I get it! You mean cause Bon Bon hasn't raped you yet!"
>Fucking what.
>No way. You need to put your foot down here.
>One rape is more than enough.
>You raise up your hand, one index finger extended, about to correct some bullshit.
>Lyra looks at it, eyes widening.
>"Oh! That means, I'm right, right?! I should go get her right now!"
>what no
"what no"
>"Look forward to this one, Anon! She's got that earth pony strength!"
>She rushes for the door as your face does that horrible contortion again.
>"Plus, she's not super into males, so I bet it'll be all weird and cute and stuff! Back in a jiff!"
>And just like that she's gone, should-be-adorable little hoovesies clip-clopping down the road.
>Fuck.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 07:00:18 No.25975514 Report

Quoted By: >>25975528

>>25975504
And him again.

>As soon as she's out, you realize you have to act fast
>You can't let that experience repeat itself
>Lyra's wet, sopping pussy, squeezing around your shaft still haunts your dreams
>You slam the door closed after the two make their way out
>And set about piling what furniture you can
>You set chairs on stools on desks
>The whole construction teeters dangerously as you continue to build on it
>But you just don't have time to nail it
>You're sliding a desk over when you here that voice
>"Anooon! We're baaaack!"
>It triggers you, and you see flashes of your past assault
>You close your eyes and shake your head
"You can't come in!"
>You hear the unclicking of the door
>Wait, when did she get a key?
>And the door swings outwards
>You slap your hand on your face when you realized it
>"Woah, someone's been busy!"
>You don't really see much of her face through all the furniture
"I won't le-"
>The shockwave propels you backwards, and you see the barricade obliterated before you
>Pieces of shattered furniture flow out in a spiral, and you hold your hands up
>To shield you from both the bright light that emanates from Lyra's horn, and the whirling pieces of wood
>You feel a piece smack against your forearm, and you let out a yelp
>It stings, sending vibrations down your arm
>You're sure it's going to bruise
>"Are you ready, Anon?"
>The light fades
>As the clattering subsides, you lower your arms
>Lyra stands at the doorway, smiling
>Floating a drink with a bendy straw next to her
>And in steps BonBon

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 07:01:19 No.25975528 Report

Quoted By: >>25975539

>>25975514

>No
>Not this time
>You scramble around, feeling on the ground for something, anything
>And you find the broken leg of a chair
>You stand up, holding the piece of wood in your hands
>Feeling its weight, its balance
>The voices of like, 2 anons ring in your head, telling you to fight back
>You grip the wood in both hands, facing it towards BonBon
>Who looks at you with a puzzled look on her face, one that you imagine saying "really?"
>Lyra giggles
>"Oh yeah, fighting back! You're gonna love her!"
>She sits her ass down near the door
>And raises a hoof
>"Go!"
>She lets it fall as BonBon rolls her eyes and springs forward
>You widen your legs, keeping a low center of gravity
>Your newfound reflexes slow her motion down just enough
>And you swing out, a broad swideways swing, pushing your hand at the base of the club for more force
>It connects with her side, sending shock waves down through your arm
>You feel your entire body shake with the force
>There's barely a single grunt from BonBon as she goes with the swing
>Her body flings to the side, and she hits the floor rolling
>The club swings back for the force, and you stagger backwards, shoulders feeling sore
>The weapon feels heavier in your arms, and you hold it up towards the mare
>She doesn't seem fazed at all
>Well, shit
>You yell and run towards her
>You need to take the initiative
>She rears back and holds her hoof up
>Taking the club in her frog with a little grunt
>And sends a punch with the other
>You see it coming
>And roll your body into her, sending your weight into the tiny mare
>The slam sends the two of you backwards, tumbling
>And ends with you on top of her, and the weapon sprawling away
>Her eyes are wide in surprise
>You sit back up
>And rear back a punch
>"Oh shit, you go Anon!"
>her hooves fling upwards in defense

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 07:02:20 No.25975539 Report

Quoted By: >>25975544

>>25975528

>You send your fist crashing down against her
>Her hooves are actually really strong though
>And they really hurt when she blocks you
>You had sent your entire body travling into that punch
>And she takes that momentum, bucking her legs up
>And sends you flying over on top of her, landing on the ground with your chest
>It knocks the wind out of you, and you hear her roll back up
>You hear her panting a little
>Of course, nothing compared to how heavily you're breathing
>But you just have to wear her down
>You struggle to get up, the fatigue setting in
>And stars suddenly flood your vision as she slams down on your back
>Her hoof digs into your shoulder blades and you yell out in pain
>And try to roll back
>Your weight has the advantage over the little pony
>And you send her onto the ground beside you as you flip over
>She rolls away and gets up
>You shakily get on your feet
>Scanning the floor for another weapon
>And spy a chair
>You keep your eyes trained on BonBon, who barely looks tired
>Walking slowly to the side, hands reaching out
>She strifes opposite your motion, ready to pounce
>Her eyes notice where you're nearing
>And she leaps
>You grab the chair as quickly as you can and turn it towards her
>You feel your feet slide back as her body slams into the seat of the chair
>None of the legs stabbed her, and it looks like it barely phased her
>She grips one of the chair legs in her hooves
>And breaks it off
>Fucking shit

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 07:03:21 No.25975544 Report

Quoted By: >>25975562

>>25975539

>You give a loud battlecry
>It probably just sounded like a weeabo shouting
>And charge forward, pushing your entire weight into the makeshift shield
>She's surprised by your onslaught, and...
>Well, the force pushes her over, so that's good
>Except she's now on the floor while your momentum carries you forward
>On top of her
>She holds a hoof out and you trip
>At least you didn't charge forward that much, because when you land on the ground it doesn't hurt too much
>BonBon gets back up and you turn around, holding your chair up towards her
>She's taking in more breaths now
>You're making a dent in her stamina
>Her hoof bats at the chair in your hands
>And it sends the thing flying, smashing into the wall
>Wait, was she going easy on you?
>You scramble backwards as she approaches, eyes looking around, panicking
>You pick up another wooden leg
>And throw it at the slowly approaching BonBon
>She bats it with her hoof, smashing it to pieces
>You feel the wall behind you
>And you naturally start to sit up as you scoot further back
"W-wait, don't!"
>"Looks like you're screwed, Anon!"
>Lyra slurps loudly, having emptied her drink
>She steps over your legs
>And sends a hoof ramming towards you
>You close your eyes
>And feel shudders on the wall behind you
>You peek open, and see that she had punched right beside your head
>And made a fucking hole in the wall
>She leans her head in, eyes leveling
>"Take off your pants."
>Her words are flat
>Emotionless

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 07:04:08 No.25975553 Report

Quoted By: >>25975579 >>25975696

>>25951797
I have to say, with Cheerilee being such a recurring character, and given her interest in this, I'm really hoping she ends up joining in with this debauched herd that's forming.

>>25951884
>Slave Pone general separate from this one
I was getting a "Humans thing ponies are just dumb animals" vibe from things, when it wasn't a plain >"Anon buys a slave and treats them well" stories. like >>25957405 mentioned.

>I find the concept of continuing another writer's story (without their permission) to be absolutely disrespectful.
As long as it's made clear that it's a new author, then most of the problems vanish. That was the problem we had with the last person who tried continuing the story. The fact that he didn't have any understanding of what the story was was also a big factor. He was about as faithful as Micheal Bay, except replacing the explosions with mediocre first-time writing.

I'd also have no problem with continuing another writer's story at a branching point of some kind. Like choosing to make a different decision that makes more sense to the new author, or choosing to go down a different route. It's a pretty clear "alternate universe" version of the story.

>I think, if anything, we should encourage other writers who want to write softer stories, while still continuing what we have.
We've been encouraging the "You guys are mean! Where's the nice, healthy, consensual bondage stories that describe a safe, sane scene like at the fetlife meetups?" people to create the smut they want to see for a long time, and almost none of them do it.

It always seems to be the longer-term writers throwing them a bone that they leave the thread before they can appreciate.

I think that the narrative requirements dictate the level of acceptable severity in the story. Punishment /could/ have gone the route of raping Celestia after breaking her legs, but that would have required Anon to be a much simpler, more shallow character.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 07:04:45 No.25975562 Report

Quoted By: >>25975601

>>25975544
The rest is me, though I'm not super confident in it. Might rewrite at some point.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 07:05:58 No.25975579 Report

Quoted By:

>>25975553

>"I might be able to warm up to a dick, but I know I already love tongues."
>"Psssh, yeah you do." says Lyra, practically beaming as she raids your fridge for another drink.
>Your vision is dominated by her twin holes.
>Well, fraternal twins, at any rate.
>One is a big meaty pussy, wet, and smelling animalistic and fleshy.
>The other is a suprisingly small anus. Dry as any unlubed body part.
>And you don't really wanna smell it.
>You don't really wanna lick either one of these things either.
>Even though that puss is...appealingly wet. Slimy, really.
>Did that fight really do that?
>You might be in this one for the long-haul...
>There's a powerful *THUD*, the sound of a hoof on the floor next to you.
>"Lick something." she says, though it's a little hard to hear her with her fleshy flanks bulging around you ears.
>But you do.
>You tilt your head up so your lips touch hers, and stick your tongue out into her scented passageway.
>Almost immediately, Bon Bon tenses every muscle in her body, putting pressure around your face, and somehow feeling heavier.
>Fucking magic, physics-defying rapist horses.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 07:07:32 No.25975601 Report

Quoted By: >>25975627 >>25975634

>>25975562

>"I might be able to warm up to a dick, but I know I already love tongues."
>"Psssh, yeah you do." says Lyra, practically beaming as she raids your fridge for another drink.
>Your vision is dominated by her twin holes.
>Well, fraternal twins, at any rate.
>One is a big meaty pussy, wet, and smelling animalistic and fleshy.
>The other is a suprisingly small anus. Dry as any unlubed body part.
>And you don't really wanna smell it.
>You don't really wanna lick either one of these things either.
>Even though that puss is...appealingly wet. Slimy, really.
>Did that fight really do that?
>You might be in this one for the long-haul...
>There's a powerful *THUD*, the sound of a hoof on the floor next to you.
>"Lick something." she says, though it's a little hard to hear her with her fleshy flanks bulging around you ears.
>But you do.
>You tilt your head up so your lips touch hers, and stick your tongue out into her scented passageway.
>Almost immediately, Bon Bon tenses every muscle in her body, putting pressure around your face, and somehow feeling heavier.
>Fucking magic, physics-defying rapist horses.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 07:09:20 No.25975627 Report

Quoted By: >>25975641

>>25975601

>She shudders and moans for a bit, making a kind of warbling, shaking noise.
>"Dang, one touch. We raped the human, huh, Bon Bon?" says the familiar voice of your first rapist.
>"Y-yes! Yes we did!" Bon responds, and you realize that this cannot be anything other than an orgasm.
>From one touch.
>Jesus, how turned on *was* she?
>You lick again, suddenly remembering how strong she is, and the fact that you stopped licking for a second.
>Like a good boy.
>NO WHAT
>THAT IS NOT AN OKAY THOUGHT
>...You still do though.
>She rides out her orgasm, grinding into your tongue, your nose...everything.
>It gives you a good opportunity to savor her candylike flavor.
>You face is sopping wet with Bon Bon juice by the time she finishes.
>You hear a wet sound from Lyra's location.
>"Mmmm...That was hot. Human's mate cool." says Lyra, and you realize she's masturbating to the show.
>The wet sound repeats, with a familiar rhythm.
>Probably the same rhythm she rode you with.
>Well, at least she knows how she likes it. That should make things nice and eas-
>WAIT NO WHAT
>WHERE ARE THESE COOPERATIVE THOUGHTS COMING FROM
>Bon Bon, above you, speaks sternly.
>"You stopped licking."

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 07:10:20 No.25975634 Report

Quoted By:

>>25975601

>The fear hits you like a train.
>You don't know what to do except resume.
>"No, that's too late. You already messed up."
>aaaaaaah lick harder! harder!
>Get the rest of the mouth involved! Suck! Figure something out!
>aaaaaaa
>"But that's okay." she says softly.
>"This time." she says in that flat-commanding tone again.
>Accompanied by another *THUD* for emphasis.
>"Right now, I want to see why Lyra likes dicks so much. Finish taking your pants off."
>You realize they're still half on, and try to get to your feet to to remove them properly.
>And, you know, your underpants, which are still entirely on.
>But you don't get to your feet.
>You try, but all it accomplishes is pressing your face extra hard into Bon Bon's snatch.
>"Mmmmm. Yeah, get in there." says Lyra, those wet sounds getting a little louder.
>"That's your place, right? Pinned under one of our asses? I bet you love it, don't you?"
>The wet sounds get a little more intense, and she just 'mmm's for a while.
>"He was trying to stand up, Lyra." says Bon Bon, nonplussed.
>"Oh." the green mare replies.
>Then you hear her voice get mischievous.
>"Well don't let him! This should be reeeeeally rapey. That's the right way. Twilight said!"
>"I know." Bon responds, matter-of-factly.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 07:11:21 No.25975641 Report

Quoted By: >>25975653 >>25976161

>>25975627

>Then to you she says.
>"You're not getting up. Take your pants off with my pussy right where it is."
>You feel her crotch flex and twitch as she says that.
>One of the pinches to your nose actually hurts a bit.
>How fucking strong is this mare?
>A voice in your head says 'too strong to deny'.
>You don't acknowledge it.
>You just obey her command.
>You slither your body like a sine wave as your hands work to get your pants off.
>Feeling a slight shift in the distribution of Bon Bon's weight on your face, you realize she's looking intently at your groin.
>Anticipating.
>You work those off the same way - it's a little easier since they're smaller.
>You don't need to be told.
>You're a good boy.
>NO YOU'RE NOT
>YOU'RE A BAD BOY
>A VERY BAD BOY
>'and bad boys get punished' says that voice, seemingly coming from nowhere.
>You realize with a sinking feeling as you take out your dick for the use of your two rapists, you might be in this one for the long-haul...

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 07:13:01 No.25975653 Report

Quoted By: >>25975739 >>25976535

>>25975641
All for now.
I'm anticipating no one liking it, so that might be all forever.
Still, wanted to give the story another hurrah. The thread it originated in died a horrible death when someone cringe-highjacked.

And to that other anon who contributed parts of this: you're a cool dude.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 07:17:34 No.25975696 Report

Quoted By:

>>25975553
This won't be a herding story, that's another story for another time.

>We've been encouraging the "You guys are mean! Where's the nice, healthy, consensual bondage stories that describe a safe, sane scene like at the fetlife meetups?" people to create the smut they want to see for a long time, and almost none of them do it.

It's easier to bitch than create your own green. Look at the weekly "Why are there so many stories featuring anon oc self insert stories?" threads that crop up almost on a weekly basis. Suggest that they go write those stories and they don't even bother to respond. Not once have I seen them say "You know what? You're right, I'm going to go do that right now and contribute to these niche stories!"

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 07:21:16 No.25975726 Report

Quoted By:

>>25951386
I think it could work, but it'd have to be someone with a few posts of green under their belt, just because the starting stuff is usually pretty consistently bad.

>>25954312
>Would it be considered "shitty" if I were to describe how the ponut worked on anon's junk?
I've had this idea for an anal scene that involved having the mare clean Anon Jr. With the caveat that it was a planned, or prepared for sex session, so everything was cleaned and rinsed out.

>>25954312
>Not that anon, but are we calling anything we don't agree with bait these days or are just not allowed to have a differing opinion.
I think they're just having a hard time separating legitimate, thought out show criticism with the repeated complaint over and over again.

>>25955241
>Basic story is ERA had some hard core Ayn Rand politics, got drunk, and started arguing them.
/pol/ had an outage at that time, apparently. Then, of course, since he posted it with his trip on, it became part of his identity.

>Vhatty was also kinda salty about his stuff not getting as much attention at MrN and others
It was also explained to him a dozen times that his story was pre-written, and Nameless had an ideal CYOA story on his hands. It was a formatting issue. I don't know if he ever really got the message, but the majority of the other writers seemed to understand that.

>>25958078
>There was that one newbie writefag who started writing a ow the edge story, full of gore and grimdark he got BTFO and told to leave after half a thread
When was this? I don't remember it. I remember getting into an argument with one person who was pushing for edge like a broken record when it wouldn't make sense storywise. I gave an example of an OwTheEdge story sequence, and someone suggested that I actually write something, so I did.

I got like three entries in before I stopped giving a shit about writing a story that was an exact example of what I didn't like.

This would have been before the thread numbers, though.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO rarity_sweetie_belle_by_apricolo (...).jpg, 139KiB, 1200x829

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 07:22:00 No.25975739 Report

Quoted By: >>25975776

>>25975653
I'll give it a read. Thanks for posting it anon. Have a Rarity.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 07:25:15 No.25975765 Report

Quoted By:

>>25868878
>not wanting luna to play us
>not wanting luna to beat us

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 07:26:16 No.25975776 Report

Quoted By:

>>25975739
That's appreciated anon.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 07:48:45 No.25976020 Report

Quoted By:

>>25957405
>>High Quality.
>A massive issue. Writing in SiM is difficult for new writers, and even older ones. Since the standard demanded is so high, these stories take more work than normal. Once their published, new writers get no real feedback.
>
>SiM has a very poor "time invested > Comments Received" ratio for non-CYOA stories. That kills motivation.
I don't think that that's much of an issue. We usually give new writers a hell of a lot of thorough feedback, and backup proofreading.

I was one of the more thorough people who gave feedback on stories, usually 1-3 posts worth per entry, and I made a special effort to make a good writeup for a new writer or new story. I was away from the thread for a time, so maybe the volume of feedback dropped off a bit.

>>25957468
>Anyone got suggestions for CYOAs?
Set in Equal Town, either long before Twilicorn's visit, or in a unicorn Twilight version of Equestria like it should have been.

Reader is a newly-inducted earth pony member of the town who didn't take a lot of convinving to say it was probably a good idea to join up, because he's suceptible to some peer pressure. The thing is, after he has his cutiemark removed, the voices (us) start talking, telling him what to do, and they speak a lot more convincingly than the ponies around him. Like most crazy people, he's smart enough to keep ponies around him from finding out just how out of it he is.

Basic storyline and goal: find out what's going on with him and investigate whether his lost cutiemark had something to do with it.

SiM elements included: Uhh... ends up domming Glimmer in private as her stress relief since she sees he's willing, but not entirely programmed. All public appearances remain the same. Opportunity for soft domming during inept sex interrogation...?

This got harder towards the end.

The Pip

The Pip Sun 03 Jan 2016 08:07:06 No.25976161 Report

Quoted By: >>25976243 >>25976472

>>25975641
This is literally Flutterrape. Post that stupid shit there.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 08:17:43 No.25976243 Report

Quoted By: >>25976253 >>25976287 >>25976309

>>25976161
I thought rape was cool here . . .?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 08:18:44 No.25976253 Report

Quoted By: >>25976287

>>25976243
And by "cool" I meant like an "acceptable topic."

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 08:23:51 No.25976287 Report

Quoted By:

>>25976243
>>25976253
Haven't read the story yet, but >rape is usually fine as long as the focus is on sub/dom or at least vaguely tied to BDSM. Straight up >rape tends not to be popular here, at least that's my understanding.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 08:26:32 No.25976309 Report

Quoted By:

>>25976243
Its not the rape that's the problem its the retarded set up and the comedic tone trying to be played seriously towards the end. Its stupid, but luckly for you there is an entire general of stories exactly like that called Flutterrape seriously go read one of the stories over there and compare it to the one you just posted notice look at the similarities. Read any of the stories here notice how fundamentally different even a random story from here is from any given story there as well as yours.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 08:48:20 No.25976472 Report

Quoted By: >>25976512

>>25976161
Back to RGRE with you, The Pip.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 08:54:44 No.25976512 Report

Quoted By:

>>25976472
Shitposting got a little out of hand and I forgot to remove the name I was using for funzies. I'm better now. Don't hate me.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 08:58:00 No.25976535 Report

Quoted By: >>25976562

>>25965742
>>Sometimes it wasn't even necessarily called slavery.
>>Indentured servitude for some.
Indentured servitude ends after a few years, at which time, the individual is paid a lump sum and becomes a free person. During those years, however, it's functionally slavery.

I think your story would have started off better in the cage, with Anon remembering how he got here.

Giving Equestria high tech labs and exposition fairies right outside his cage, and the callous treatment of what they recognize as a sapient creature that even speaks the same language as them doesn't make a lot of sense considering how griffons and minotaurs exist in this world.

>>25965760
Having a bit of a language difficulty causing the issues, like in the PetAnon threads (Check out the Lost In Translation story here: http://pastebin.com/u/Uh-hmmm only 3 chapters), would have been a viable way to do things.

As it is, it doesn't feel like or evoke the Equestria setting at all. Not even with the talking horses of unknown colouring.

It reminded me of this HiE story with Lyra being the interviewer, since they just discovered a strange ape who they didn't know was sapient or intelligent. I dropped that story pretty hard when the author showed that his human had hands for feet for... no adequately explained or hinted at reason.

I dropped it at the end of that chapter, so maybe there's a good explanation, but I'd just lost any way I had to really relate the the main character.

>>25975653
Started off meme-tastically bad. Started to get decent from a scene-oriented point of view when he woke up near Lyra.

The meme inner voice is trying to make this into a comedy, but everything else about it is trying to push this into more of a horror-ish story.

There are serious tonal inconsistencies here.

I don't think this is the comedy thread you're looking for, but the writing in the story got decent. It's the plot and characters that need work at this point.

Also: New Thread Needed.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 Jan 2016 09:00:59 No.25976562 Report

Quoted By:

>>25976535
Oh hey, complicated-answer guy is back. Excellent, I love your feedback.

Tumultuous !Fj8KDKpu76

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Tumultuous !Fj8KDKpu76 Sun 03 Jan 2016 09:43:32 No.25976894 Report

Quoted By:

New Thread!

>>25976873
>>25976873
>>25976873

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