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No.35498011 View ViewReplyOriginalReport
Ho ho ho eh it's yore buddy Carl here, here to tell you whut the latest is on...Pony Life? Whut da hell is dat? Dat some kinda Big Brother thing or sumthin? 'Cuz I ain' gonna watch a buncha hoarses on camera unless dey doin' da horizontal hayride, an' even den dey gotta be dressed up like fifteenth-century peasants.

Listen. I ain' seen Pony Life and I ain' gonna see it. Why? 'Cuz I know dat da only reason it got made was so Hasbro can sell a buncha toys to gullible little girls or guys in their thirties dat know how ta' use a drill, if you get my drift.

Hasbro is evil. You know it. I know it. Even dey know it, but dey don't care 'cuz people like you keep on buyin' der crap an' watchin' de stupid shows dat dey put on da air. Why'd Twilight get her wings? 'Cuz dey wanted to make der sales quota an' keep people watchin' der show. It's like when Doctor Who changes Doctors 'cuz da other guy demanded more money and hoors in his trailer. Well you know what? Yore buddy Carl is too smart for dat. Exceptin' for da' hoors, I mean. I always got time for dem.

Look. Pony Life ain' da best tin' dat Hasbro ever did. Okay. Whatevuh. All I'm sayin' is dat it ain't gonna git any bettuh as long as people keep supportin' it, an' givin' Hasbro da satasfaction an' dolluhs dat dey want. Write a nasty e-mail threatenin' ta kill der dog or sumethin. Mebbe make a petition online talkin' 'bout how you gonna go on a hunger strike until Princess Celestia stops lookin' like sumthin' dat escaped the radiation at Chernobyl. But Pony Life ain' gonna work until yoo, da fans, make it work, an' until den?

Enjoy havin' Pinkie Pie look like sumthin' you'd see just before you died in da woods after gettin' lost on a campin' trip.

'Cuz mark my words, she's der. An' she's watchin' yoo. Good luck, my friend. Yoo gonna need it.