Holy shit this cat has more sense of adventure than this entire board. How do we get motivated to pursue our dreams like this cat?

Over the past four months, I've been "dilating" (haha epic meme I know) my stomach with air. I swallow air like I'm making a burp and then keep it in there. I take one gulp per minute until I can't take any more in, and then I expel the air.

Since I started, I increased my capacity to 2 liters to 7.5 liters, without eating any more than I usually do. I test this every other week with electrolyte balanced water.

I'm still underweight but my stomach capacity beats 99.9% of people now. I recently took a trip to a local buffet and shocked the waitresses.

Thoughts?

Hey, just read this image, Lara. You asked this on the phone but like you often struggle to think of things to say or how to convey thoughts through text I struggle with such things in verbal communication especially on phonecalls.
Especially the highlighted parts. Read it, please. You can forgive me and look past my misdeeds and talk to me until the end. Or maybe there doesn't need to be an end? If I slowly over time win your trust and prove to you I have changed and redeemed myself. That the Old Samuel that made you smile and laugh and warm and happy is back and here for good. Please. Let me show you that.
If not then I promise it'll come soon and I will be good and wholesome and the best and most helpful person in your life until I depart. I need you, and only you, until then. Please. God, just help me. Please.
Come on. When the situations were reversed I always still talked with you. I always stayed in your life. Please. Please, return the favor and be there for me and forgive my past weaknesses and mistakes. Please.

I know you're scared. You're scared if you begin talking to me again you'll fall into that place where I could hurt you again, right. That's it. That's the only explanation for why you won't talk to me at all. Your other explanations were contradictory and don't make any sense. It can only be that.
Hurting you hurts me. So if you cannot believe I care about you at least believe that I care about myself and never feeling this immense, soulcrushing pain again ever in my life, Lara. Please at least believe this if nothing else.
I could never hurt you again. I will never.

Please, God... just give me a chance.

Ok, so a girl i know said that "you can take my hand whenever you want"
She was pretty inebriated when she said this. Does this mean she likes me?
dont judge me im a fucking robot, normies

Hey yourbiggestfan do you want to talk?

Ebola, please come back. I miss you. I think about you every day. Wont you please forgive me and come back and be with your friends?

How much different are you personality wise and socially on the internet as oppose to real life? How do you think the internet has effected your goals/aspirations from the amount of time you spend on here?

Stop thinking about Rome

Trannies spamming the board again

Robots, we have waited long enough. The year is almost two thirds done and the star of 2023 has failed to materialize. There has been a disturbance of the natural order. We must put out the call ourselves.

Registration for the inaugural Next Top Fembot season is now open. The winner will be recognized as the number one challenger to Iris who will be invited to defend her crown or stand aside.

Existing active fembots were automatically registered. Newcomers must timestamp to enter. Your GET determines your opponent in the first round of qualifiers. Dubs can choose their opponent. Once we have eight challengers, the home fembots will be invited to specify their preferred method of competition from the list below. The rules will change in later rounds.

HandStandoff
Most (You)s
Cosplay Off
Vidya
Drawfaggotry
Poetry

Once a match has been fixed, a strict time period for the bout will be set. Missing your deadline or failure to register will result in immediate disqualification with no opportunity to appeal.

~~~Summon:
Cewl (CONFIRMED https://desuarchive.org/r9k/thread/73892632/#73892757) Has until September 12th to post her Glow Up
Pukara (CONFIRMED https://desuarchive.org/r9k/thread/74302948/#74303029)
Vampcha (ELIMINATED BY SANA IN MATCH #1)
BeeBee (CONFIRMED https://desuarchive.org/r9k/thread/74487111/#74488928)
Empath (UNCONFIRMED)
Trick (UNCONFIRMED)
Wren (UNCONFIRMED)
Miyoko (UNCONFIRMED)

AWAY TEAM:
1 Ken-chan (CONFIRMED https://desuarchive.org/r9k/thread/74532091/#74532591) Has until September 12th to post her Glow Up
3 Sana (CONFIRMED https://desuarchive.org/r9k/thread/74454727/#74454925)