i want female attention but i look ugly have no personality no skills

this breaks the incel

>tfw fat gf who I find attractive, but no one else does.

> Started dating girl in picture 2 years ago
> Currently 34 but i was a virgin up to the point i started dating her 2 years ago
> We had sex almost immediately, a week after or so, when we meet
> I am actually in a happy non toxic relationship where i can be myself with her
> I realize that i dont like sex, its lame
> Maybe is the size of my dick? its around 4.7 inches
> I always knew it was small... but she keeps telling is the correct size
> We had sex now a millon times to this point
> I really REALLY dont like sex
> She is always horney and we fuck... but i dont have a good time i hate it.
> The only good moment is when she sucks my dick and i finish, the rest is bullshit.
> Is sex always going to be like this?, did i burned myself with porn or something?, am i doing something wrong?

https://youtube.com/shorts/uANqJ_ASYTk?feature=share
Just stay home and jack off to porn. You will never be not creepy enough to have a successful or even congenial encounter with a woman

I want a soft boy, a quiet boy. Someone who likes to be kept. I want to collar him, chain him. And have him surrender himself to me. Small.. Fat, Soft... These are qualities I like. My needs should always come before his own. But once my needs are met first my gentle hands will always help him find his. He should be submissive, eager to please. And most of all a gentleman.

Don't bore me with these loud incompetent displays of machismo. Your vain waxing about the days when men ruled the world. Or how unfair life has been for you. If you really wanted to earn my favor you'd toss aside that worthless pride and kneel before your queen. Should you do it I may be merciful, and grant you an audience before me.

Unlike gross men, I am capable of kindness.

What's a good drug to cope with unrequited love? Alcohol makes me feel like shit the next day. I heard shrooms cure psychological turmoil like depression and anxiety. I've heard good things about DXM too. Heroin and meth are a bit too hardcore for me. Benzos are scary too.

>had a dream about having a gf
Good dreams are worse than nightmares, honestly

Ever since I found out I have jewish ancestry I joke about being able to smell money
>end of the month
>ask dad for money to pay the bills
>says we're short
>take his wallet and start sniffing
>sniff all the way to my mother's purse
>go back to the living room
>sniff in between the cushions
>find 10 dollar bill
>dad is fucking pissing himself
>says good job
I am a literal money hound.

I think I have auditory hallucinations. I often hear the sound of my mother crying but when I go to check it's just the TV or her talking normally on the phone. It's quite distressing at times especially when I'm high.